SYNOPSIS

ZAPPY

A Screenplay

by

Gazza & Andy King

(c)2002

This is a contemporary, fantasy comedy screenplay for young adults.  The story revolves around a thirteen year old boy by the name of Johnny Longbow. He has an elder brother two years his senior, a mother and an airline captain father. They live in a two storey house near the sea in a suburb of a major Australian city - although the story could be adapted to anywhere in the world. His best friend is Clifford Fischer, who lives just down the road, and they attend a local high school, about half a kilometre from Johnny's home. Clifford is a genius at maths, but not so good with other subjects, and a little naive. He also has an uncanny knack of mispronouncing words. Johnny's elder brother, Alan, who attends the same school, is in year nine, Johnny and Clifford are in year seven.
   On Johnny's thirteenth birthday he is expecting a radio controlled model aeroplane, but instead receives a beach comber metal detector. Johnny has bragged to the school bully about the present he will be receiving, and when the day arrives and he gets a metal detector instead of the plane, he decides he has to miss school for a while to avoid the embarrassment and unpleasantness of facing the bully, so he heads off to the local beach with his metal detector to get himself bitten by some kind of marine animal to be temporarily injured, thus allowing him a week or two away from school. However, while prodding around in the shallows he is knocked off his feet by an electric eel. After a few moments, Johnny Longbow comes to and drags himself back home, soon to discover he now has the power to read people's minds. Johnny Longbow now encounters all variety of weird situations and dramas with his new found power. Meanwhile, Johnny is vying for the attention of a girl in class, which only complicates matters.

ZAPPY

a 

Screenplay

by

Gazza & Andy King

(c) 2003

THURSDAY, SPRING, 2005

FADE IN:

Opening sequence - whilst credits are rolling - will be P.O.V. of something swimming under the water in early dawn, passing the occasional fish. The camera will then leave the water and go airborne to about a hundred feet, giving a perspective of one of the main story settings, passing over the water, the beach, some parkland, before pausing above Johnny Longbow's home, a couple of hundred metres away. We then descend in through the roof and the story begins.

INT.  BEDROOM  -  MORNING.

OPEN:

Johnny asleep in bed, the early morning light coming in through the window.

FADE TO:

DREAM SEQUENCE:

Johnny is flying a radio controlled aeroplane, telling his DAD how it is the best birthday gift he'd ever received as he swoops and dives and lands and takes off at the parkland near the beach. His big brother, ALAN, then gets his hands on the controls and after a little hell raising, he crashes the plane into a tree. Alan has a stupid look on face as father and Johnny stare at him with shock. Then they all look up at the plane which is embedded high in the tree, leaking fuel. Alan's eyes widen as he turns and starts to run, screaming, "Run for it! It's gonna blow!"

										CUT TO:

Johnny being awakened by his MUM, DAD and big brother, ALAN, all bearing gifts, singing 'Happy Birthday To You.'

                                                           	 ALAN
                    (thrusting a gift about the size and shape of a football into Johnny's chest.)
			 Here. Open mine first!

Johnny obliges, pretending to be surprised as he unfolds the wrapping to expose an Australian Rules Football.
   
                                                           	JOHNNY
			Gee, thanks, Al.
 
Johnny hand balls it across to Alan quickly, just so he can unwrap what he really wants. Johnny grins broadly as he tears the wrapping to shreds of the largest present, desperate to see the front of the box, which undoubtedly would display the picture of the actual plane inside. But when he gets through all the wrapping, his eyes suddenly bulge when he sees a picture of a Beach Comber Metal Detector.
 
                                                         	JOHNNY
                                       Oh...Beauty.

Johnny says it in a way which could be interpreted many ways. The way he means it is, "This is the biggest box of shit I've ever seen in my life!" His parents and brother take it as, "Excellent! This is brilliant!" Johnny quickly opens the other gifts, made up of socks and pajamas and other paraphernalia, hoping like crazy that maybe amongst all this crud is a model aeroplane. But there are no planes. The last gift is a small parcel, containing a miniature, Micro-Recorder, (the type used by reporters) which he hasn't opened yet.

 			                      	FATHER
	                           It's great, isn't it? Best metal detector
		               on the market. Water proof and everything.

				          	JOHNNY
 			           	     (almost convincing)
		    	   Yeah. I've never seen anything like it.

					ALAN
      			    Be great at the beach. A lot of idiots lose rings
			    and things down there.

Johnny now unwraps the micro-recorder, almost as an after thought, aware that something this small cannot be an aeroplane. It's about the size of two match boxes, silver and state of the art. He wonders what it is until his dad explains.

					FATHER
			 What do you reckon? Great for studies. I used to
			 have one when I was at high school.

					JOHNNY
			 What is it?

					FATHER
			 It's a Micro-recorder. The batteries are already in it.
			 It's digital, doesn't even need a tape. It's even got a
			 keypad to put in your own secret password so no-one
			 else can use it. Go ahead. Give it a go!

Johnny turns it on, keys in a password, then holds it to his mouth.

					JOHNNY
				       (into recorder)
			 Hello. Hello, this is me speaking, is anyone there?

Johnny then clicks a button or two and replays his words. His parents grin broadly, but Johnny still can't quite bring himself to excitement, having not received a plane. But he tries very hard to look impressed.

					FATHER
			 See, works great. You'll wonder how you ever
			 got along without it after a while.	

                                                     	MOTHER
                                     Okay everyone, time for breakfast.

Mother and Alan exit. Father is last to leave, lingering at the bedroom door.

					FATHER
			  Happy birthday, Johnny.

					JOHNNY
				         (forces a smile)
			  Yeah, thanks, dad.

Dad smiles, then closes the door behind him, leaving Johnny sitting there in a state of shock.
                                                  
                                                  	 MOTHER(O.S.)
		   	  Brekky will be ready soon, Johnny!. You don't have
			  to go  to school today, remember. Wear your new 
			  socks and shirt.

Johnny fails to reply. He just sits there, double checking the gifts. Then he gazes into his dressing table mirror and we see his reflection as he mutters to himself, like he's talking to his twin brother.
 
                                                      	 JOHNNY
			                 (to mirror, mortified) 
			 I can't believe it. How could dad not get me the
			 plane?
			 		   (beat) 
			 Oh no, I stuffed a photo of it in Big
			 Bad Barry's face the other day. He's going to
			 make my life unbearable tomorrow.
 			
                                                   	MOTHER (O.S.)
                                     Johnny! Breakfast is on the table!

					JOHNNY
					(calls out)
			 Okay, Mum. I'll be right down! 
				          (then to mirror)
			There's only one answer. I've got to go down to the
			beach with my crap, soon to be in the bin metal
			detector, and get stung by a sting ray or something.

Johnny gets out of bed and moodily dresses, mumbling bitterly to himself.

					JOHNNY (cont)
			 Yeah. A sting ray. That should put me in bed until
			 the embarrassment wears off.

INT.   KITCHEN/DINING ROOM  -  MORNING.

There is a big juicy birthday cake sitting in the middle of the table, thirteen candles ready to be lit. Alan and father are already seated at kitchen/dining room table eating. Mother is still serving breakfast as Johnny pastes a forced smile on his face.

                                                 	MOTHER
                                   			(to Johnny)
                                    How many friends are coming on Saturday, darling?
				(referring to his birthday party)

                                                  	JOHNNY
                  		I don't know yet, ma. I've asked about a dozen, give or
		            take a few.

                                                 	 MOTHER
  			Well make sure you find out tomorrow, okay. I want to
			 know how many to cater for.

                                                  	FATHER
                                                  (looking out window)
            		Looks like you're gonna get some good weather for
		            it, Johnno

                                                 	JOHNNY
                                                      (forcing a smile)
                                   Yeah, beauty. Great barbecue weather.

					MOTHER
					(to father)
			You'll be home Saturday, won't you honey?

					FATHER
			Yep. No prob. That reminds me. Alan, can you take
			the pool cover off when you get home tonight?
			Check the chlorine levels too.

					ALAN
			Why can't Johnny do it? He'll be home all day.

					MOTHER
					  (tisks)
			C'mon. It's his birthday. It won't hurt you to do it.

					ALAN
			But it's his chore day today. Do I have to do all
		            his chores?

					FATHER
			Yes, you do, Alan. And don't forget to rake the
			 leaves. Johnny can do yours on your birthday.

					ALAN
					(2 beat)
			But my birthday falls on his chore day anyway.

					JOHNNY
			How do you know that? Your birthday's two months
		            away.

					ALAN
			I checked the calendar.

					JOHNNY
			Who gets the extra day?

					ALAN
			What do you mean?

					JOHNNY
			There's 365 days in this year. Who gets the 
		            extra day?

					ALAN
		 	I don't know. I didn't work that out. I just worked
			out what days I have to do.

					FATHER
			(wavering head and rolling eyes with slight annoyance)
			It doesn't matter who gets what days. It all works out
 		            the same in the end. Alan, when it's your birthday,
			Johnny will do your work on the following day too,
			alright?
 
Alan reaches over and takes the last sausage from the centre plate, dips it into the sauce on his own plate and takes a bite. Then he holds the other half out as an after thought.

                                                  	ALAN
                                                        (mindlessly)
                                     Did anyone want this?

                                                  	FATHER
                                                        (tolerantly) 
                       		Would it matter if we did, it's a bit late now isn't it?

Alan shrugs, then stuffs the rest in his mouth and stands from the table. He picks up his school back pack and the football and bounces the ball as he turns to head out the nearby back door.

					MOTHER
                              	Hang on, Alan. We've got to light the cake.

Alan returns to the table. The candles are lit.

					MOTHER
					(to Johnny)
			 Okay, darling. Blow out the candles and make a wish.

                                    		JOHNNY
 				        (embarrassed)
			Oh, ma. I'm a teenager now. I'm gettin' a bit old for that,
			aren't I?

					FATHER
			 Come on. You never get too old for making a wish.
               	
Mum, Dad, Alan sing another chorus of "Happy Birthday". Begrudgingly, Johnny blows out all the candles.

					MOTHER
			 Did you make a wish?

C.U.: on slightly peeved expression.

					JOHNNY
			 Yes, mum. I made a wish                                                                                                                              

					MOTHER
				(handing Johnny a knife)
			 Here you go, darling.

Johnny slices the cake and four pieces are placed on plates. Alan stuffs his down as he heads to the back door again.. 

					ALAN
       			Come on, Johnno. Let's have a quick kick before I
			have to get to school!

                                                            JOHNNY
			Nah. I've gotta learn how to use my new...metal
			thingy so I can get down to the beach and...and
			find, a fortune, in buried treasure. Yeah, that's it. I'm 
			going to find buried treasure!'

					ALAN
                                                 (carefree, bouncing ball)
                                     Alright. I'll see yas later!

C.U.: Johnny's eyes like daggers toward his brother, watching him take the football.
 
Alan exits. Mother starts clearing table. Father is drinking coffee. Johnny stands.

					JOHNNY
  			Anyway. Thanks, Mum. Thanks, Dad. Gotta go
			up and read the instruction manual. I'll see you
			later.

					FATHER
			 Okay, Johnno. Have a good day, son.

					MOTHER
			 Alright, darling.

INT. BEDROOM  - MORNING

Johnny is sitting on his bed. He picks up the micro-recorder, almost like it's an old habit, and puts it to his mouth.

					JOHNNY
				         (into recorder)
			Hello. Hello. Is this stupid thing still working?

He replays the words to test that it is actually working, then he puts it back to his mouth.

					JOHNNY(cont)
					(into recorder)
			I made a wish alright. I wished I'd gotten a plane
			instead of that dog turd metal detector.
				(he is about to switch off the
				recorder, when he puts it to his mouth
				 again.)
			I can't believe it. Alan bought that football for himself.
			That rotten mongrel. Make a note. Buy him a pair of
			underpants for his birthday. And make sure they're
			at least two sizes too small.

He switches off the recorder, puts it in his pocket, then picks up the box containing the metal detector and takes out the instruction manual.

EXT.  BEACH  -  MORNING.

Johnny arrives at the beach, about a two minute walk from his house. The beach and pier are sparse of other people. The weather is fine, about twenty seven degrees. A beautiful Spring day. The tide is out and the sand flats stretch out about  fifty metres, before the salt water grows inch by inch out into the bay. Johnny removes his runners, peak cap and socks, placing them in a neat pile in the sand, next to the pier. He stashes his micro-recorder in his socks, then switches on the metal detector. He takes a coin from his pocket and throws it on the sand, pushing it a few inches deep with his toe. He then waves the detector over it and it hums loudly as it detects the coin. It then dawns on him that the detector really works and decides to give it a proper go.

					JOHNNY
				        (mutters to self)
			 Hey. This thing works. Maybe someone's
			 lost a gold ring or something. Yeah, then I
			 can buy my own aeroplane.

Johnny retrieves the coin, then casually walks along the beach, wavering detector back and forth.

He tries for about a minute without success and the boredom beats him. He looks up at the vast expanse of beach ahead of him and he screws up his face.

WIDE ON:

Johnny and beach as it seems to go on and on.

					JOHNNY(cont)
					  (to self)
			 This is ridiculous. I could be here forever.

He meanders out to where the sand flats meets the gentle lapping water, waving the detector back and forth as he goes.
					
					JOHNNY(cont)
				              (to self)
			 Now, let's see what nasty little sea creatures
			 are out here.

His metal detector hums gently to show it is working, but there is no indication that any type of metallic objects are lying about as Johnny goes ankle deep into the water. As he walks into slightly  deeper water he turns over the occasional rock or shell on the bottom, gently raising each object with the water proofed detector dish, looking carefully to see if anything lives beneath. But there is no sign of life. He wanders around for another twenty metres when he comes upon, what looks like a discarded bicycle inner tube.

					JOHNNY(cont) 
				      (mumbles to self)
			What's this, an inner tube.

Curiously, he prods it with his detector when all of a sudden his machine goes off the dial, squawking loudly. Suddenly, a blue flash erupts, blowing Johnny ten metres backward. He lands on his back with an enormous splash. The cool, shallow water lapping around his ears brings him back to his senses. He sits up in the water, metal detector laying across his chest. He rattles his head to gain some clarity, looking around to try and figure out what had happened. Then it dawns on him.

					JOHNNY(cont)
 			That was no inner tube. That was an electric
			eel.

He brings himself to his feet and plods from the water. He puts on his socks, shoes and cap and grabs his micro-recorder, and with a thumping headache, drags himself and his metal detector back home, noticing a slight, purplish shock mark on his hand where he'd held the detector.

					JOHNNY(cont)
    			That should do it. A migraine headache and 
 			a sore hand should put me in bed for a while.

EXT.  DRIVEWAY  -  MORNING

As he turns into his driveway, he sees his dad leaving through the front door, dressed in his captain uniform, (ESTABLISHING HIM AS A PILOT) on his way to the airport. They meet halfway down the driveway.

					FATHER
					(frowning)
			 What happened to you?

					JOHNNY
					(drowsily)
   			 I got electrocuted by an electric eel.

					FATHER
  			 Oh my God. Are you okay?

His dad removes his captain's cap and kneels down, holding Johnny by the shoulders, as if to keep him steady on his feet.

					JOHNNY
   			Yeah, I'm okay, dad. Just got a bit of a headache
			and a sore hand. I think I just need to lie down for
			a while.

 					FATHER
		            (Feels son's forehead and checks his hand) 
			Come on. Let's get you inside and tell your mum.
			We might have to take you to hospital for a
			check up.

					JOHNNY
				 (before they start inside)
   			Dad. Can I ask you something?'

				          	FATHER
			Of course, son. What is it?
   
					JOHNNY
			Why didn't I get an aeroplane for my
			birthday?

His dad pauses for a few long moments, then looks Johnny square in the eye. But before his dad can move his lips, Johnny hears the words - in his father's voice, along with a type of radio static.

In scenes such as this, the V.O. thoughts of the person Johnny is reading will be scripted in UPPER CASE.

					FATHER (V.O.)
C.U.: on father as he sighs, trying to find the right way to put it.
			    (type of radio static in background)
YOUR MUM AND I JUST THOUGHT YOU WEREN'T READY FOR ONE YET. WE'RE GOING TO GET YOU ONE NEXT BIRTHDAY.
 
Johnny knows the words his dad is thinking even before he speaks them, as if his dad had told him telepathically. A moment later his dad says the exact words again, but this time he actually speaks them.

					FATHER(cont)
			Your mum and I just thought you weren't ready
			 for one yet. We're going to get you one next
			 birthday.

C.U.: Johnny's eyes going wide with shock.

					FATHER (cont)
			 Do you understand, son?'
   
					JOHNNY
				(nods and replies nervously)
			Hey? Oh. Yeah. I understand, dad. Where
			are you	flying today?

C.U.: on father.
   
					FATHER (V.O.)
				         (usual static)
I GOT THE ADELAIDE, PERTH RUN. WHY? 

					FATHER
				         (moments later)
			I got the Adelaide, Perth run. Why?'
   
					JOHNNY
			Hey? Oh, just wondering.

					FATHER
   			Come on. Let's get you inside.

Father stands and escorts Johnny inside.

INT.  KITCHEN/DINING ROOM  -  MORNING

					MOTHER
			Oh my lord, what happened?

					FATHER
			Don't panic, love. He's alright. Just got a 
			bit of a shock from an electric eel

Mother makes a big fuss about it. She wants to call an ambulance immediately, but Johnny convinces her he just needs some rest. She gives him two aspirin and orders him up to bed.

INT.  BEDROOM  -  MIDDAY

He awakes without the headache several hours later. (his bedside clock reads 1.00 PM) He sits himself up in bed and switches on his television, then remembers the sudden, unusual power which had afflicted him.

					JOHNNY
					(to self)
	 		Hey. My headache's gone.
					 (beat) 
			I wonder if that mind reading thing went with it?
 
Just then his mum comes bustling up the stairs, carrying a tray loaded with birthday cake, hot sausage rolls and ice cold cola.

					MOTHER 
			You awake, darling? I brought you a little
			snack.You just lay back and rest, okay.
			How are you feeling?

					JOHNNY
   			Mum, if you had to pick a number between
			one and a thousand. What would it be? And
			Don't tell me. Just think of it!

					MOTHER (V.O.)  
				           (usual static)
MY GOD. I'D BETTER CALL A DOCTOR. I THINK HE'S DELERIOUS?

					JOHNNY
			I'm feeling good, mum. Honestly. Go on. Pick a
			number.

					MOTHER
			Oh, alright. Let's see now. Ahhh.
					(usual static)
TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY SEVEN

					JOHNNY
   			Let me guess. Was it two hundred and
			fifty seven?

					MOTHER
   			Yes, it was. How did you know that?

					JOHNNY
   			Hey? Oh. It was just a magic trick I saw on
			tele. Pretty cool eh?

					MOTHER
			Yes, that's very clever. How's it done?

					JOHNNY
   			Sorry, mum. A magician can't reveal his secrets.

					MOTHER
			Well, that shock couldn't have done you too
			much harm to be doing magic tricks.
				           (exiting)
			Just call if you want something, darling.
   
Johnny sits up and eats his snack, watching television.

					JOHNNY
				       (frowning at tele)
 			 Hey. How come I can't read the minds of
			 people on TV?
					(shrugs)
 			 Must have something to do with pre-recording.
			 Or distance maybe.

Johnny puts aside his food tray and lays back in bed, until gradually he drifts off to sleep.

FADE OUT:

on bed side clock, reading 1.43. p.m.

FADE IN:

on bedside clock, reading 4.10. p.m.

Alan comes stumbling in through Johnny's bedroom door, waking him up.

					ALAN
   			Coooool. I've been stung by a bee and bitten
			by a spider, but I've never been pinged by an
			electric eel. That must be something, hey? 
			Did it hurt?

Johnny brings himself up in bed, wiping the sleep from his eyes.

					JOHNNY
			Yeah, a little bit. How was school?

					ALAN
   			Just the same boring day at the same boring
			place with the same boring people.

Johnny notices the football under his brother's arm. It looks like it has been kicked around the school oval all day long. Suddenly, Johnny remembers his special talent and a question which has plagued him for the past several weeks comes to mind.

					JOHNNY 
			Al. Remember that thirty bucks I saved up and
			hid under my mattress? I was just wondering if
			you knew what happened to it?

					ALAN
			                   (usual static)
NOT THE THIRD DEGREE AGAIN. I PINCHED IT. HOW DO YOU THINK I BOUGHT THIS STUPID FOOTBALL?
			I swear. I know nothing about it. I reckon it was
			stolen by that rotten little mate of yours. What's his
			name? Clifford, isn't it? Yeah. He's the one I'd be
			looking at. I've never trusted him. How long have
			you known him? About eight months?
			And already he's your best mate. I'm telling you,
			Johnno.You can't make someone your best mate
			until you've known them for at least a year. Trust
			me. I know. I've been at that school two years
			longer than you and I still haven't got a 'best mate'.

					JOHNNY
					(cannily)
   			Hmmm, yeah. Maybe you're right.

Alan looks very pleased with himself, swapping the football from under one arm to under the other.

					ALAN 
			You wanna go out for kick before tea?
   
					JOHNNY
			Nah, I've still got a bit of a head ache.

					ALAN
				        (heading out)
   			Okay, no prob. Catch ya later.

After Alan exits, Johnny climbs out of bed and dresses into some fresh clothing.

INT. LOUNGE ROOM  - AFTERNOON.

Johnny creeps into lounge room and looks to see that his mum is in the kitchen/dining room and his brother out of sight, then sneaks out through the front door.

EXT. STREET  - AFTERNOON.

Johnny scurries off to Clifford's house, just down the road. 

INT.  CLIFFORD'S LOUNGEROOM  -  AFTERNOON

CLIFFORD is slightly smaller than Johnny, rather naive and has difficulty with certain English. He is however, a genius at maths. 

Clifford opens the door when the doorbell rings and his eyes light up.

					CLIFFORD 
			I was just about to come around to your place.
			What kind of plane did you get? Was it the
			Jet Fighter? Has it got fold up wheels?

					JOHNNY
			 I didn't get a plane...

					CLIFFORD
			 What?!

					JOHNNY
			 Let's go to your room for a minute.

INT. BEDROOM   -  AFTERNOON.

Clifford sits on the end of his bed. Johnny sits on the side of the bed. The look on Clifford's face could peel the paint from a brand new car.

					CLIFFORD
			You've got to be joking? You're kiddin' me,
			 right?

Johnny slowly shakes his head.

					CLIFFORD (cont)
			What did you get then?
					
					JOHNNY
			A metal detector.
   					
					CLIFFORD
			A what?! What's a metal detector?

					JOHNNY
   			You know, one of those things that finds hidden
			 metal, like rings and coins and things.

Clifford flops backward onto the bed, staring at the ceiling as if he'd been exposed to Frank Sinatra music.

					CLIFFORD
 			Oh my God. I can't believe it. I called Big Bad
			Barry a loser today 'cause he hasn't got one.
			You should have seen the look in his eyes. If it
			wasn't for the plane, he would have torn me a
			new one right there and then. He only left me 							alone because he thought he'd get to fly it. I'm
			a dead man.

					JOHNNY
			Cliff. Pick a number from one to a thousand.
			Don't tell me. Just think it.

					CLIFFORD
   			 What?

					JOHNNY
   			Just do it.

					CLIFFORD
				              (shrugs)
					(usual static)
UHHHM, LET'S SEE. SIXTY TWO.

					JOHNNY
  			Sixty two, right?

					CLIFFORD
					 (frowns)
   			Yeah, that's right.

					JOHNNY
			 Do it again.

					CLIFFORD
				            (usual static)
SEVEN HUNDRED AND FOUR.

					JOHNNY
			 Seven hundred and four.

					CLIFFORD
			 Yeah, that's right. What about now?
					(usual static)
NINE HUNFRED AND NINETY NINE

					JOHNNY
			 Nine hundred and ninety nine.

					CLIFFORD
					 (frowning)
			Alright. What is it this time?
					(usual static)
OKAY. THIS TIME I'LL TRICK HIM. I'LL JUST ADD THE FIRST FOUR PRIMES TOGETHER. SEVENTEEN.

					JOHNNY
   			The first four prime numbers equal Seventeen.
			Right?

Clifford maneuvers himself on the bed, like he is preparing himself for a bigger shock than hearing there is no aeroplane.

					CLIFFORD 
			That's exactly right! How'd you know that?

					JOHNNY
   			If I tell you something, you've got to promise me
			you won't tell another soul. You're the only person
			in the entire world I'm going to tell this to. Do you
			swear?

					CLIFFORD
   			Yeah, yeah, of course. I swear.

					JOHNNY
   			Well, I went down to the beach with the metal
			detector this morning. You know, to see if I could
			find a sting ray, or something like that, and get it to
			sting me so I wouldn't have to go to school
			for a few weeks...

					CLIFFORD
					(interrupting)
   			What about a blue ringed octopus. (innocently)
			 That'd knock you out of action for a while.

					JOHNNY
				       	(frowns)
			 What? Are you crazy? Blue ringed octopus don't
			 just knock you out of action, you idiot. They
			 actually kill people.
				 (Johnny stares at his mate, as if to
			 	 try and figure him out, then rattles his
				 head to get back on track)
			 Anyway. While I was there I poked
 			 an electric eel and it zapped me with an electric
			 shock. It knocked me back about a hundred
			 metres.(exaggerates) And when I woke up I could
			 read people's minds.

					CLIFFORD
					 (skeptically)
   			Okay then, what am I thinking right now?
					(usual static)
 GEE I HOPE MUM DOESN'T MAKE CABBAGE TONIGHT

					JOHNNY
   			You're hoping your mum doesn't make cabbage for 
			 tea tonight.

					CLIFFORD
				     (leaping from bed) 
			Oh my God. That's right! That's exactly what I was
			thinking. Alright. Now what am I thinking?

Johnny pauses, looking at his friend intently.

This time we don't show the thought and static process of the other player to ESTABLISH that it isn't always necessary to do so.

ANGLE ON:

Johnny as he seems to be concentrating.

					JOHNNY
   			You want to know if Big Bad Barry is gonna
			 beat the hell out of you tomorrow.

					CLIFFORD
   			Yes. That's right! That's amazing. I can't believe it.

					JOHNNY   
			See. I know exactly what people are thinking. That
			eel gave me the power to read people's minds.

					CLIFFORD
					  (2 beat)
   		            Well?

					JOHNNY
   			Well what?

					CLIFFORD
   			Is Barry gonna beat me up tomorrow?

					JOHNNY
					(frowning)
   			I can read minds, Cliff, not tell the future.

					CLIFFORD
		           Oh...Right.

					JOHNNY
   			You can't tell anyone about this, okay? It's got to
			be our little secret. Just you and me can ever know
			about it for as long as we live.

					CLIFFORD 
					  (excited)
			Of course. You're my best mate. I'll never tell anyone.
			Do you realise what this means? Do you realise the things
			you can do with this?

					JOHNNY
   			I know. I know. The only thing is, I've noticed that
			I've got to be looking at the person and concentrating
 			a little bit for it to work. I can't read their minds if I'm
			not actually looking at them.

					CLIFFORD 
				   (resuming seat on bed)
      			Big deal. Who cares. Besides, imagine how confusing
			it would be if you were reading everyone's mind at the
			same time. It'd be no good to you. Hey! You know
			Sally, the chick who likes sitting near the back of the
			class?

					JOHNNY
   			Yeah, the one with glasses.

					CLIFFORD
   			Can you use your..."zappy"(coining film title)
			 powers to find out if she likes me?

					JOHNNY
   			Yeah okay, I don't see why not. I didn't know you
			fancied Sally.

					CLIFFORD
   			Are you kidding. She's fantastic. Hey, while you're
			at it you can see if Kelly likes you. Everyone knows
			you've got the hots for her.

					JOHNNY
					(frowning)
   			What do you mean "everyone" knows? You're the
			only one I ever told that to.

					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
I'M SORRY. OH MY GOD I'M SORRY. I TOLD TRISH, SALLY'S BEST FRIEND. I ONLY DID IT TO SEE IF YOU HAD A CHANCE WITH HER. I DID IT FOR YOU.

					JOHNNY
   			What exactly did you tell Trish?

					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
I SAID YOU THOUGHT KELLY WAS THE HOTTEST CHICK IN THE WHOLE SCHOOL. Is what Clifford thinks, but then, as if he has suddenly forgotten about Johnny's talent, he tries making it sound less forthright.

					CLIFFORD(cont)
			 I asked her who Kelly liked.

Johnny and Clifford exchange looks, then Clifford realises. He gulps.

					CLIFFORD(cont)
 			I'm sorry. You know exactly what I said, don't
			you?

Johnny rolls his eyes, then nods slowly with forgiveness

					JOHNNY.
			It's probably good that she knows I like her. Might 
			work in my favour. When did all this happen?

					CLIFFORD
			Last week

					JOHNNY.
   			What did Trish say?

					CLIFFORD
   			She said it was none of my business. But hey. It
			doesn't matter now. You can find out for yourself.

					JOHNNY
 					  (hums)
   			Trouble is, I know Big Bad Barry likes her too.
			Even if she does like me, how do I get past that
			big freak?

					CLIFFORD
   			Are Kelly and Sally coming to your party on
			Saturday?

					JOHNNY
   			I don't know. I invited them. I think Sally is a definite,
			but Kelly seems a bit iffy.

					CLIFFORD
   			Just read her mind tomorrow and find out for sure.
			Barry's not invited, so we'll make a good impression
			on the girls and before you know it, they'll be all over
			us like a bad rash.
				 (Clifford's mispronunciations
			 	 are scripted in bold text)
 			Anyway, what are we gonna do about Barry? When he
			finds out we didn't get the plane he's gonna stir us
			stupid. He'll show us up in front of the whole class. 
			Not to mention what he's gonna do to me for calling him
			a loser. He's gonna knock me out, then shave my
			eyebrows. Remember about six months ago when 
			Sidney Bayer fell asleep in class and Barry shaved
			his eyebrows and painted those big black Gonzo 
			eyebrows on him?

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah I remem...
					(frowns)
			 Who's Gonzo?

					CLIFFORD
			 You know. That Gonzo Marx bloke.

					JOHNNY
			 It's not Gonzo Marx, you idiot. It's Groucho Marx.
			 One of the Marx brothers.

					CLIFFORD
			Who cares? You know who I mean. Remember
			 that?

DISSOLVE TO:

classroom as Johnny recalls incident. Everyone is writing except for SIDNEY BAYER, a tall kid with glasses, face down on a desk at the back of the class, sound asleep. He really does look like Groucho Marx. The teacher is writing at the front of the class when the teacher notices Sidney asleep.

					TEACHER
					   (loudly)
			 Excuse me, Mr Bayer! We're not disturbing
			 you, are we?!

Everyone looks around as Sidney slowly raises his head. Sure enough, his eyebrows are gone, and in their place are two big black strips of indelible ink, about two inches higher than where they should be. A black moustache has also been printed on his face. Everyone starts to laugh, especially BIG BAD BARRY and his best friend, STEWART SIMPSON. Barry is the school sports hero. He is a lot bigger than most kids in years seven and eight and has a tendency to bully. His best friend, Stewart, is a little smaller and has really bad teeth.

RETURN TO SCENE:

					JOHNNY
			Yeah, I remember. Anyway. You know how it works.
			Just don't show any fear. Barry only gets nasty when
			people show they're scared of him.

					CLIFFORD
			 But I am scared of him.

					JOHNNY
			Yeah, I know that, so am I. But we don't let him
			 know that, do we? 
   .
					CLIFFORD
   			What about his stirring? You know how bad he gets.
			He's gonna start throwing paper planes around the
			class and making jokes about us in front of everyone.
			It's gonna be a living hell.

They both ponder deeply for a few long moments, until CLIFFORD'S MUM (V.O.) calls out that dinner is ready, snapping them out of it.

INT.  LOUNGE ROOM  -  AFTERNOON

As Johnny and Clifford enter the lounge room, Clifford's MUM comes from the kitchen, wiping her hands on a tea towel.

					CLIFF'S MUM
					     (smiling) 
			Hello, Johnny. I didn't know you were here. Would
			you like to stay for tea?

					JOHNNY   
			No thanks, Mrs Fischer. I've got to get home.

					CLIFF'S MUM
   			Are you sure? We're having roast lamb.

					JOHNNY
   			No, thank you. I've really got to go.

Clifford walks him to the front door.

					JOHNNY
    			See you tomorrow, Cliff.
				 (then softly, having read mum's
				 thoughts)
			Oh, and by the way, you're not having cabbage
			for tea, you're having Brussels sprouts.

					CLIFFORD
				      (screws up his face) 
			Oh no. They're worse than cabage.

INT.  KITCHEN/DINING ROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny arrives home and his own dinner is being prepared. His dad isn't home, and no-one has noticed him gone. He enters the kitchen.

					MOTHER
   			Hi, darling. You didn't have to get up. I was going to 
			bring your dinner up to you. I cooked your favourite. 
			Grilled Flounder and mashed potato.

					JOHNNY
   			Great. Thanks, mum.

Alan suddenly appears from the back yard, the football still in hand.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
SPOILT LITTLE BRAT. IT'S HIS BIRTHDAY EVERY DAY. AT LEAST HE NEVER GOT THAT AEROPLANE. SUCKER. NOW, I'LL SIMPLY FORGET ABOUT BREAKING THE WINDOW ON THE BACK SHED AND HOPEFULLY NO-ONE WILL NOTICE UNTIL JOHNNO'S PARTY ON SATURDAY. THEN ONE OF HIS LITTLE WEASEL MATES CAN TAKE THE WRAP.

   					JOHNNY
			(turns to his mother and scratches his head)
 			Did you hear that smashing sound before, mum?

  					 MOTHER
			What smashing sound?

   					JOHNNY
					(shrugs)
 			I'm not really sure. But a couple of minutes ago I
			thought I heard a sound out the back like, I don't
			know, kinda like the shed window being smashed.
			It woke me up.

His mum looks at Alan, who stands there with a stupid look on his face, trying to conceal the football behind his back.

					ALAN
		            It was an accident, mum. It came off the side of my
			boot. I was gonna tell you. Promise.

					MOTHER
					  (sternly) 
  			I want that window fixed by tomorrow, young man. 
			Before your father finds out. Otherwise you'll be
			"chore boy" for sixty days straight.

As mother goes back to preparing dinner, Alan glares at Johnny.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
YOU ROTTEN LITTLE MONGREL. HOW DID YOU HEAR THAT? THE SHED'S RIGHT DOWN THE BACK OF THE YARD AND IT BARELY MADE A SOUND.

   					JOHNNY
					(to mum)
			I think I'll go up to my room and watch tele. Would
			it be okay if I have dinner up there?

   					MOTHER
					(smiling)
			Of course, darling. I'll bring it up as soon as it's ready.

INT.  JOHNNY'S. BEDROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny enters his room and sits on his bed. He switches on tele.

C.U.: on Johnny pondering, eyes darting about as he lays back on his pillow.

					JOHNNY
			                   (to self, thinking)
			Hmmm. How do we get Barry off our backs
			tomorrow?

He sits bolt upright as an idea springs to mind.
Johnny rises from his bed and pops his head out the door to see that the coast is clear. Mum is still in the kitchen and Alan is sitting in the lounge room watching tele.

INT. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny creeps up to his parents' bedroom door and slowly opens it, wincing as the door makes an almost, really loud, creaking sound. He peers over the second storey balcony to see that no-one had heard it, then makes a quiet dash into his parent's bedroom.

INT. PARENT'S BEDROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

He rakes his fingers through the contents of  his mum's jewelry box in the wardrobe until he comes upon a gold watch. It is quite beautiful, a fourteen carat band and snow white face, surrounded by what could be four tiny diamonds, encrusted in the gold bezel over the numbers twelve, three, six and nine. Johnny replaces the box and shoves the watch in his pocket, then slinks from the room.

INT. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny closes the door as slowly and quietly as he had opened it. The door has almost finished it's creaking sound when Johnny hears his mum say something to Alan in the lounge room, obviously on her way up to Johnny's room with his dinner. His hand is still on the door handle, the door almost closed when he hears her start up the stairs. Another two steps and she'll be head high to the landing, able to see him standing there, at her door with his hand on the handle. As quick as a flash, he secures the door and shimmies, James Bond style, along the wall to his own room, making it to his bed moments before his mum enters with his dinner.

INT. JOHNNY'S BEDROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

					MOTHER
			Here you go, darling. How are you feeling?

					JOHNNY
				(gulps, accepting the tray)
                           	Great, mum. All this rest has done wonders for
			me.

					MOTHER
   			That's good. If you don't feel up to it tomorrow,
			you can stay home from school if you like.

					JOHNNY
				     (shaking his head)
			No, no, I'll be fine, mum. No worries.

					MOTHER
			Alright, darling. Enjoy your tea.

As she leaves the room and closes his bedroom door, Johnny glances down at his pants and sees half the watch band dangling from his pocket, the gold glittering so bright he is amazed his mum hadn't noticed it. He wipes his brow.

					JOHNNY
					 (to self)
			Phew, that was a close one.

He starts his dinner while watching his portable television, when suddenly he leans down to his school back pack and takes out his mobile phone. He writes an SMS message to Clifford, softly speaking the words as he writes.

					JOHNNY
				        (to self, texting)
			I've...borrowed...my mum's...gold watch.
			We'll stuff...it...in Barry's face...tomorrow
			and say...we found it...with the detector.
			Make it...look like...a better present
			than...the plane. What do you think? 

INT.  CLIFFORD'S KITCHEN/DINING ROOM  -  AFTERNOON

Clifford is at the kitchen/dining room table, screwing up his face at three Brussels sprouts, pushing them around his plate as if to put off the inevitable, when his mobile phone beeps audibly in his bedroom. His mum is finishing up in the kitchen.

					CLIFFORD
			 Ohhh, I'd better get that, mum. I'm expecting an
 			 important message about...homework.

					CLIFF'S MUM	
			 Alright, hon. But hurry up. You haven't finished
			 your dinner yet.

INT.  CLIFFORD'S BEDROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

He dashes into his room and picks up his mobile. He frowns, trying to understand the message until he finally gets the gist of it. Then he writes a reply.

C.U.: of reply message on mobile screen: "Thats a Grate Ideer. Dont Furget. Wee Got GIM Furst Clas Tomowwo." Clifford sends the message.

										CUT TO:

Johnny getting message. He screws up his face, scratching his head while trying to understand it.

										CUT TO:

Clifford puting his mobile phone in his top pocket. He sneaks down the hall and we show his P.O.V. as his mum enters the loungeroom and sits down to watch tele. Clifford then creeps around the other way and goes into the kitchen. His plate with sprouts is still sitting on the table. His mum always demands he eats his greens. He quietly picks up the plate and takes it to the bin next to the fridge. He quietly opens the bin with the foot lever and is about to pour the sprouts in, when all of a sudden his mobile phone rings with a very loud, Benny Hill tune. Clifford leaps into the air with surprise and although the plate is still in hand, the three sprouts go flying into the air - one lands back on his plate and the other two splonk on the floor, right infront of Clifford. His mum is about to come in to see what's going on when Clifford soccer kicks one of the nearby sprouts out into the loungeroom, basically under his mum's feet. Just as mum enters the kitchen, Clifford takes a step forward and stomps on the other sprout to cover it. His mum goes over to the sink as Clifford takes his phone from his pocket. As yet, his mum is non the wiser as to what's going on.

					CLIFFORD
		         (answering phone, plate and sprout still in hand)
			Hello...

										CUT TO:

					JOHNNY
					(irritably)
   		            You idiot, Clifford. Why don't you use the predictive
			 text? That's why it's on the phone, you know.
			 I can't understand a single word you write
			 half the time. I feel like I'm working for ASIO. It 
			 takes me ten minutes just to decipher it.

										CUT TO:

					CLIFFORD
   			I don't like using that thing. Halfway through a 
			word it 	beeps and takes you to that stupid, spell it 						yourself box. And you know I can't spell.

										CUT TO:

					JOHNNY
			You'd better believe it. If you weren't a maths
 			wizard, you'd still be in kindergarten. Listen.While
 			we're on the phone, think of something. I wanna
			see if I can use my...what'd you call it again?
			Zappy power over the phone.

					CLIFFORD
			                (beat, then through phone)
   	 	            Okay, Did you get it?

										CUT TO:

					JOHNNY
   			Nah, not a thing. What was it?

										CUT TO:

					CLIFFORD
			      (he is obviously thinking, 'Fucking hell.
			      What am I gonna do about the sprouts'?) 
			 Ummm...nothing important.

										CUT TO:

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah, alright. Anyway, I'd better go. I'll see
			 you tomorrow.

										CUT TO:

					CLIFFORD
				        (through phone)
    			Okay. See you outside my joint around twenty to
			 nine. (switches off phone and puts in pocket)

					CLIFF'S MUM
				    (holding hand out for plate)
			 Come on. Eat the last one. Then you can help me 
			 do the dishes.

FADE OUT:

on Clifford picking sprout off plate, like it's a hand grenade. Then, as he starts to chew it, his mum turns away with the plate and Clifford lifts his foot to see the mess he's going to have to cop to.

INT.  LOUNGE ROOM  -  AFTERNOON. 

Johnny enters lounge room and sits with his big brother to get some life long, unanswered questions out of him, like - "When I was six, did you deliberately get me lost at the Royal Show?" and "When I was eight and you accidentally bumped me off the pier while fishing, was it really an accident?"

Alan is watching tele, minding his own business. Johnny sits down on a chair across from him.

					JOHNNY
			     So, how you doin'?

					ALAN
				         (usual static)
WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CARE.
	 		    Why?

					JOHNNY
					 (shrugs)
			    Don't know, just wondering.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
YEAH. WELL GO AND WONDER SOMEWHERE ELSE. I'M BUSY.

Johnny laughs softly to himself, getting Alan's attention.

					ALAN (cont)
			 What are you laughin' at?

					JOHNNY
			 Oh, nothin'. I was just thinking about that time we
			 went fishing and I fell off the pier.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
FELL? YOU FOOL. I PUSHED YOU. THEN I PRETENDED I WAS GETTING SOMETHING OUTTA THE TACKLE BOX.
			Yeah. That was a real hoot, wasn't it?

					JOHNNY
			 And that time I got lost at the Royal Show.
			 Remember that?

					ALAN
			    	  (shrugs indifferently)
				        (usual static)
 WHAT SHOW? I DON'T REMEMBER THAT. WOULD HAVE BEEN FUNNY BUT.

					JOHNNY
			  What about the time I was up the ladder cleaning
			  the guttering when the ladder suddenly disappeared,
			  leaving me hanging there. That was a bit of a laugh,
			  wasn't it?

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
YEAH. LAUGHED MY HEAD OFF. ESPECIALLY SINCE I ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE KICKED IT FROM UNDER YOU.
			 You were lucky that day, weren't you?
		 	 If I didn't come along and help you down 
			 you'd have probably fallen off and broken a leg.

					JOHNNY
			 I gave you half my pocket money for saving me
			 that day, didn't I?

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
 YEAH I KNOW. YOU SHOULD'VE GIVEN ME THE WHOLE LOT.

					JOHNNY
			 What about the time...

					ALAN
				 (becoming agitated)
			 Hey, what is this? A trip down memory lane
			 or somethin'? I'm tryin' to watch tele here.
			 Get lost.

					JOHNNY
			 Oh, sorry, Al. Anyway, I'd better get up and
			 do some homework.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. JUST BEAT IT AND LEAVE ME ALONE. I'M TRYIN' TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET OUT OF SCHOOL TOMORROW SO I CAN GO TO RYAN'S AND PLAY PS2 ALL DAY. I CAN'T WAG NO MORE 'CAUSE MUM AND THE VICE PRINCIPAL ARE ON TO ME. THE ONLY WAY OUT IS TO GET A LETTER FROM MUM TO SAY I'M CROOK. BUT HOW. SHE JUST DON'T TRUST ME NO MORE...

					JOHNNY
					(starting out)
			 Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. Did you hear about
			 Jack Monroe's brother. (all lies)

					ALAN
			 No, what?

					JOHNNY
			 I heard from a kid at the beach that he broke his
			 thumb the other day and doesn't have to go to
			 school for a whole week.

					ALAN
			 You're kidding? How'd he break it?

					JOHNNY
			 Got it caught in a door. But some say he done it
			 on purpose with a hammer, just to get out of school.
			 But you know how much bull gets thrown round
			 that school. Probably just another tall tale.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
HANG ON A TICK. COME TO THINK OF IT, MONROE'S BROTHER WASN'T AT SCHOOL TODAY. IT MUST BE TRUE. WHAT A BRILLIANCY.

Mother walks into lounge room. Alan stands from seat.

					ALAN (cont)
					  (to mum)
			 Anyway. I'd better go out to the shed and check
			 the frame of the window, you know, check the size
			 before I put the glass in.

FADE OUT:

on Johnny heading upstairs, Mum about to return to kitchen/dining room, and Alan heading out to shed.

INT.  SHED  -  AFTERNOON.

The back yard shed is about the size of an average bathroom. Inside is a lawn mower and things of that nature. There is a work bench, with tools and things lying about. Alan is fossicking around for a hammer. He finds one and goes to the work bench. He places his left hand on the bench and raises the hammer with his right hand. He practices the blow again and again, his anguished face growing more and more painful as he gets closer to doing it. Then he pulls a weird face, raises the hammer and thwacks himself with it, his eyes bulging from his head.

										CUT TO:

JOHNNY'S BEDROOM:

Johnny is lying on his bed as a huge, unholy roar echoes throughout the neighbourhood.

					JOHNNY
				       (chuckles to self)
			 Monroe's brother wasn't at school because he's
			 having his appendix out, you knuckle head.

										CUT TO:

KITCHEN:

Mother is frowning like she is trying to figure out what the hell that noise was. The howl is so unnatural that as yet she isn't aware that Alan is involved.

RETURN TO SCENE:

Alan drops the hammer like it is poison. He grabs the thumb with a pained expression and staggers from the shed.

INT. KITCHEN/DINING ROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

Mum is looking in the fridge when Alan comes stumbling into the kitchen, holding his thumb, a big blue, throbbing SPECIAL/FX bruise on it. 
  
 					MUM
			 What on earth have you done?

					ALAN
			 My thumb. I think I broke my thumb.

					MUM
			 How did you do that?

					ALAN
			 I accidentally hit it with a hammer.
			 	(sits at table, placing thumb on
				 table for mum to inspect)
			 Damn it. Now I can't go to school for a week.
			 I'm not going to be able to write.

Mum gives thumb some very close scrutiny, then goes to freezer and takes out ice tray before returning to table.

					MUM
			 What are you talking about. You write with your
			 right hand. Besides. It's not broken. Just swollen.
			 We'll put it in ice for a while and it'll be as good
			 as new by tomorrow.

C.U.: Alan's look of total dismay, then down arm to thumb, which is pulsating with SPECIAL/FX.

					MUM(cont)
					 (O.S.)
			I'll just go and get a bandage.

FADE OUT:

on Alan's face, now contorted with a sneer as he glares down at the thumb.
 
INT.  JOHNNY'S BEDROOM  -  MORNING.
   
FADE IN:

on Johnny awakening to a beautiful day. The sun is streaming in through the window as Johnny stretches, then folds his arms behind his head and has a yawn.

					JOHNNY
				    (sitting bolt upright)
			Hey! I wonder if I've still got my zappy power?

Just then his brother opens Johnny's bedroom door and pops his head in.

					ALAN 
			Mum said to get your butt out of bed and get ready
			for school!

					JOHNNY
					(innocently)
   			Is that what mum really said?

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
NO. SHE SAID TO SEE IF YOU WERE WELL ENOUGH TO GO TO SCHOOL TODAY.
			Just hurry up and get down for breakfast,
			will ya.

As Alan closes door and leaves the room, Johnny chuckles to himself.

					JOHNNY
				    (muttering with a grin)
			I know every single word you think, bro.
			You might be the big brother, but you're not the
			boss of me anymore.
					 (beat) 
			Anyway, time to get up for school. Wild horses
			couldn't keep me away today.

INT.  KITCHEN/DINING ROOM  -  MORNING.

Dressed in their school uniforms and sitting at the kitchen/dining room table, Johnny gazes over at his brother, watching his every thought as Alan eats. Father is not present and mother is making herself a coffee. Alan's thumb has a huge, EXAGERATED bandage around it, sitting it on the table like he is giving everyone the thumbs up.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
I LOVE FROOT LOOPS. I LOVE FROOT LOOPS. I LOVE FROOT LOOPS. Is what Alan keeps thinking while eating breakfast, as if his mind is a broken record, stuck on the same track. 

Totally fascinated, Johnny continues watching until his brother has finished his cereal and starts on his vegemite and toast. The froot loop fixation suddenly ends, and in its place comes Alan's plans for today at school, in year nine.

					ALAN(cont) 
MIGHT HAVE A SMOKE BEFORE SCIENCE IN THE DUNNIES NEAR THE SHELTER SHED. GOTTA TAKE THE FOOTY TOO. ME AND THE GUYS CAN HAVE A MINI MATCH AT LUNCH TIME. A REALLY GOOD FOOTBALL THAT ONE. I'M GLAD I GOT THAT BRAND. THE SHERRIN CRAPS ALL OVER THE KOOKABURRA. IMAGINE CRAPPING ON A KOOKABURRA. NOW THAT WOULD BE FUNNY AS HELL. I WONDER IF A KOOKABURRA COULD FLY WITH CRAP ON IT? I GUESS IT DEPENDS HOW MUCH IT'S GOT ON IT. IF IT WAS A LITTLE CRAP, THEN IT COULD PROBABLY STILL FLY, BUT IF IT WAS ONE OF THOSE REALLY BIG CLANGERS THEN NO WAY WOULD IT GET INTO THE AIR. STUPID THING'D JUST HAVE TO WALK AROUND ALL DAY UNTIL IT RAINED. STUPID KOOKABURRA.
				(Alan suddenly stops everything to
				 stare at his thumb)
DAMN IT. FORGOT ABOUT THIS THING. I'M GONNA HAVE TO PLAY ONE HANDED. HEY! HANG ON A TICK. IF I BROKE MY THUMB, HOW WAS I GONNA PLAY VIDEO GAMES? (shrugs) OH WELL, NO BIG DEAL.

Johnny looks away from his brother as if averting his eyes from some hideous Spielberg creation. He stands from table and goes to get his back pack from his bedroom.

INT. BEDROOM  -  MORNING.

Johnny is preparing his back pack for school. He suddenly takes out his micro-recorder and puts it to his mouth.

					JOHNNY
				        (into recorder)
			 Finally confirmed my earlier suspicions. My brother is
			 the dumbest human in the world. I can't believe that guy.
			 He's as dumb as a bag full of marbles. Oh yeah, he smokes
			 too. Imagine if dad found out. My God, even I couldn't stand
			 the punishment dished out to Alan if that kind of news
			 got loose. I had a puff of one of those things once. Tasted
			 horrid. I just don't get it. Give me a Paddle Pop any day.
				 (switches off recorder, then, just before
				 he puts it in his pocket, he turns it back
				 on and places it to his mouth)
			 P.S. get a Paddle Pop at afternoon tea.

EXT.  STREET  -   MORNING.

Johnny meets up with Clifford outside Cliff's house and they start walking the rest of the way to school, each wearing a back pack loaded with books, computer disks and gym wear. 

Johnny takes out the gold watch and shows it to Clifford, his eyes growing wide.

					CLIFFORD 
			Geez, that's beautiful. Can't wait to see the look on 
			Barry's face when he thinks we're making a fortune.
			I can't believe your mum leant it to you. Looks
			expensive.

					JOHNNY
			Well, actually, she doesn't know I took it. No big
			deal. I'll just replace it after school. She only wears
			it on special occasions, so she won't even notice it
			missing.

					CLIFFORD
 			 Yeah, no worries. You know, after you left yesterday,
			 I was breaking my brains to try and come up with an
			 answer. The best idea I could think of, was for you to
			 read Barry's mind and get his locker combination, then we
			 could pour a bag of maggots into it and make him look
			 like a loser before he could even start on us about not
			 gettin' the aeroplane.
			
					JOHNNY
			 Where were you gonna get the maggots from?

					CLIFFORD
 			My uncle Toby. He owns a butcher shop down the main 
			drag. I've been there a few times and out the back I've
 			seen some chucked out cuts of meat with maggots
			crawlin' all over em'.

					JOHNNY
					 (frowning)
			Where did your mum get that lamb from last night?

					CLIFFORD
		 	Uncle Toby. Mum gets a great deal from him. Actually,
 			he's got some really good tucker, you know, seafood, 
			rissoles, all kinds of stuff.

					JOHNNY
				  (stops dead in his tracks)
			Where's your uncle's shop?

					CLIFFORD
			The one across the road from the mall, why?

					JOHNNY
		               (takes mobile phone from bag and calls mum)
			Hi mum. It's Johnny. Where did you get that flounder
 			from last night?

										CUT TO:

JOHNNY'S LIVINGROOM:

Mum is watching tele, on the telephone to Johnny.

					MUM
		  	Why, darling? Are you alright?

										CUT TO:					

					JOHNNY
 			Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I was just wondering where
			 you bought that fish from. I was just curious.

										CUT TO:

					MUM
			 I got it at the mall supermarket. I do all our shopping
			 there, why?

										CUT TO:

					JOHNNY
			 Nothing. I was just telling Cliff how good it was.
			 In fact. I think 	you should keep shopping there
			 'cause they have really good stuff.

										CUT TO:

					MUM
			Oh. Okay, darling. Have a good day.

RETURN TO SCENE:

					JOHNNY
			Alright, mum. See you later.
				 (turns off phone, then shakes
				 head at Clifford)
			I can't believe you never warned me about that.

					CLIFFORD
					  (shrugs)
	 		Why? What's the big deal? He sells high quality stuff. 
			It's only the off cuts he throws out the back that goes
			all maggoty. A truck picks it up once a week.
					 		
Johnny gives Clifford a quizzical look, then they start walking again.

INT.  GYM CHANGING ROOM  -  MORNING.

At ten past nine, the fourteen boys from Johnny's twenty six student, co-ed class, are all getting changed in the gymnasium dressing rooms, when all of a sudden BIG BAD BARRY appears, arms folded, looking down his nose at Johnny and Clifford while awaiting the verdict. Barry's best mate and lackey, STEWART SIMPSON, who has VERY BAD TEETH is standing next to him.

					BARRY
					(grumpily)
			Well. What kind did you get?

					JOHNNY
			  (slipping on his yellow T shirt, shrugs indifferently)
 			I didn't get an aeroplane. I got something better.

					BARRY
			               (grins broadly, laughs)
    			I knew you wouldn't get a plane. You're full of  it.
				(turns to Clifford, doing
				 up his shoe laces) 
			Who's the loser now, scudge bucket? 
				(returns attention to Johnny)
			So what'd you get, a Barbie doll to add to your
		            collection?

					JOHNNY
				(shakes head, keeps his cool) 
			Nah, I got a metal detector. A really good one.

C.U.: of Stewart's really bad teeth.

   					STEWART
		 	A metal detector. What a hunk of junk! They're
			useless!

Johnny reaches into his back pack and drags out the watch, flashing it in Barry and Stewart's faces.

					JOHNNY
 			Really? Look what it found yesterday. I haven't had
			time to have it valued yet, but I reckon it's worth a
			few bucks, don't you?

Barry looks stunned. He blinks hard, leaning forward for a closer look.

					STEWART 
			You could probably buy two aeroplanes with that.
 			Where'd you find it?

					JOHNNY
   			Down at the beach. In the sand just up from the pier.

					BARRY
					(eagerly)
 			Why don't we sell it and buy two planes? Then we can
			have dog fights.

Johnny hums, as if giving the idea some consideration, then he pouts and shakes his head.

					JOHNNY 
			Nah, I don't think so. Me and Cliff have got other plans,
 			haven't we, Cliff?

Clifford brings himself to his full stature, standing about thirty centimetres shorter than Big Bad Barry.

					CLIFFORD 
				         (tough pretence) 
		            Yeah! Really big plans!

Barry clams up. He nudges his mate, Stewart, to follow and they return to their own lockers and begin changing for gym.

Johnny and Clifford smile at one another.

					JOHNNY 
			Well. That put the big freak back in his box, 
			didn't it?

All of a sudden, MR. LAIDLEY, their physical education teacher, a slim, athletic type comes in, wearing red shorts, white T shirt with a whistle draped around his neck.

					MR LAIDLEY
			Okay boys. Hurry up. We're doing Gym work today.
			Rope climbs. Ladder climbs. You know the drill.
					(usual static)
GOD, I FEEL AWFUL. DIARRHOEA ALL NIGHT AND ALL MORNING. SHOULD'VE STAYED IN BED. I'LL BE TAKING IT NICE AND EASY TODAY. LET THESE LITTLE MONSTERS DO ALL THE WORK. OH NO, HERE IT COMES AGAIN. GOT TO GET TO THE DUNNY BEFORE I RUIN ANOTHER PAIR OF PANTS...
 
Johnny screws up his face as the teacher rushes off to the toilet, blowing his whistle to clear a path through the students as he goes.

Clifford notices Johnny's look of distaste.

					CLIFFORD
					 (whispers)
			What's up?

					JOHNNY
   			Mr Laidley has got the runs. I hope he's not the rostered
 			teacher to help out in the canteen today.

					CLIFFORD
   			Yeah, stuff that for a joke. We'll have to get lunch down
 			 the road if he is.

INT.  GYM  -  MORNING.

All the boys are standing around the four dangling ropes in a corner of the rather large gymnasium, about the size of three basketball courts, when the teacher returns.

					MR LAIDLEY
					(usual static)
OH NO. I FORGOT TO WASH MY HANDS. AHHH, NO BIG DEAL. I'LL WASH THEM NEXT TIME.

Johnny's eyes bulge. He quickly turns to Clifford.

					JOHNNY
				           (whispers)
			 Mr Laidley didn't wash his hands.

Clifford's eyes widen, then the two young men stand there, watching the teacher's every move, seeing what he touches and what he doesn't touch.

Mr Laidley grabs each rope, one at a time as he walks among them, running a hand up and down as he explains how fast he wants his students to ascend, then descend, and just how many times he expects them to do so.

   					CLIFFORD 
			(whispers to Johnny, teacher talking O.S.) 
		   	Which hand does he wipe with?

					JOHNNY
   			I don't know. He hasn't thought that yet.

Suddenly the teacher stops mid sentence and turns sharply on Johnny and Clifford.

					MR LAIDLEY
   			What is it, gentlemen? Would you care to share it with 
			the rest of the class?

They shake their heads in unison, replying at exactly the same time.

					JOHNNY/CLIFFORD
	               	No, Mr Laidley.

					MR LAIDLEY
					(usual static)
IF I WASN'T FEELING SO CROOK, I'D MAKE YOU TELL ME AND THE CLASS EXACTLY WHAT YOU WERE ON ABOUT. FIFTY PUSH UPS FOR EVERYONE WOULD GET IT OUT OF YOU.

Johnny gulps, thinking the teacher might change his mind and do just that, but he doesn't. He goes back to the ropes, continuing with the virtues of a strong cardiovascular system and the best means by which to achieve it. Then he holds a rope out to Johnny.

					MR LAIDLEY
 			Take this, Mr Longbow. Let's start with you.
			Up to the top and back down as fast as you can.

Johnny hesitates, watching the hand of the teacher polluting the rope with all kinds of filthy germs. The teacher frowns impatiently.

					MR LAIDLEY (cont)
			 Here. We haven't got all day!

					JOHNNY
					(blurts)
			 I'd like to, Mr Laidley, but yesterday was my
			 birthday and while I was at the beach I slipped
			 over on the pier and got a really bad splinter in
			 my hand.

The teacher stands there for a good long moment, mulling over the likelihood of Johnny's story, when incredibly, Big Bad Barry suddenly speaks up.

					BARRY
 			It's true, Mr Laidley. He was at the beach yesterday.

					MR LAIDLEY
		(As if the word of the school's best athlete is good enough) 
			Oh, okay. You'd better get down to sick bay and get 
			the nurse to take a look at it. Get back here as soon
			as she's done.

					JOHNNY
   			Yes, sir.

Johnny maneuvers his way through the throng of students. He goes right past Clifford and grabs his attention.

					JOHNNY(cont)
				      (whispers to Clifford)
 			Quick. Tell him a story to get out of here.

Johnny is on his way out when he suddenly hears Clifford pipe up.

					CLIFFORD 
			Oh, Mr Laidley. I think I disencated a finger.

					MR LAIDLEY
			 What?

					CLIFFORD
			 Ahhh, yeah. Yesterday I was walking through the 
			 council grounds and tripped over...a duck. 

Absolutely nothing but quiet, until a moment or two later when the entire class breaks up with laughter. The teacher orders them to silence, then addresses Clifford.

					MR LAIDLEY
			 Are you trying to have a lend of me, son?

					CLIFFORD
   			No, sir. I was just walking along when one ran out
			and tripped me over...

That is the last Johnny hears as he exits through the gymnasium door to head for the first aid room on the other side of the school grounds.

EXT.  SCHOOL GROUNDS  -  MORNING.

Johnny  keeps looking over his shoulder to see if his best friend has escaped, but Clifford never appears.

					JOHNNY
					 (to self)
 			What a useless story that was. That was never
			going to work.

WIDE AND LONG:

on Johnny wandering off to sick bay.

INT.  SICKBAY WAITING ROOM  -  MORNING.

Johnny arrives at sick bay and sits down in the first chair of the empty waiting room. Moments later another student, TERRENCE, from year eight, enters and gingerly takes seat number two, directly across from Johnny.

					JOHNNY
				          (to Terrence)
			 What are you here for?

The following thought sequence will show the audience an exact replay of the incident as Terrence is reliving it vividly in his mind's eye, using Slow Mo and SFX to over exaggerate the drama. It will also be shown from his P.O.V. and spectator's P.O.V., cutting from one to the other to get an overall picture of the event

FADE IN:

on action.

					TERRENCE
					(usual static)
WELL, I WAS RIDING MY TEN SPEED RACER TO SCHOOL THIS MORNING, STANDING UP ON THE PEDALS AND PEDDLING LIKE CRAZY WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN MY FEET SLIPPED OFF AND I STRADDLED THE CROSS BAR. I SQUASHED MY NUTS REAL BAD AND I'M IN AGONY. AND UNFORTUNATELY, I WAS GOING DOWN HILL AT THE TIME SO I COULDN'T STOP THE BIKE FOR ABOUT FIFTY METRES. THEN I HIT A LOW BRICK FENCE AND FLEW OVER THE HANDLE BARS AND LANDED ON THE LAWN ON THE OTHER SIDE. I LAY THERE THINKING I WAS GOING TO DIE FOR ABOUT TEN MINUTES. FINALLY I GOT UP AND PUSHED MY BIKE TO SCHOOL AND HERE I AM. BUT THERE'S NO WAY I'M GOING TO TELL YOU THIS STORY BECAUSE I DON'T WANT THE WORD TO GET AROUND THAT I ACTUALLY KNACKERED MYSELF. IT'S JUST TOO HUMILIATING.

FADE BACK:

to waiting room.

					TERRENCE
		                         (sitting very uncomfortably)
			Oh, uhhhm. I got something in
			 my eyes...what about you?

					JOHNNY
			 (pulls a pained face of vicarious sympathy)
			 Just a splinter.

					TERRENCE
			 How long do you reckon you'll be in there for?

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know. Not long.

					TERRENCE
					 (anguished)
			 Can you make it quick. I'm in a little bit of pain
			 here.

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah, sure. No probs. 
				(then curiously, referring to the
			 	actual condition)
			 What do you think Nurse Williams can do for
			 you?

					TERRENCE
					(usual static)
MY PILLS HAVE DISAPPEARED HALFWAY UP MY BACKSIDE. I DON'T KNOW. WHAT EVER THEY DO THESE DAYS TO GET 'EM BACK TO WHERE THEY BELONG.
			 What do you mean?
				 (referring to the eyes- still
				 embarrassed about the truth)
			 She'll probably just...give 'em a good rinse
			 or something. 

NURSE WILLIAMS (a really big, not very attractive woman) suddenly enters and indicates for Johnny to come into the sick bay cubicle. Johnny stands, then gives Terrence and the nurse a comparative measure up, aware of how unpleasant the experience is going to be for the pair.

INT.  SICKBAY CUBICLE  -  MORNING.

Johnny and the nurse enter the small cubicle where treatment is performed in private.

					NURSE
			So. What seems to be the problem?

					JOHNNY
				     (holding out hand)
			 I slipped over yesterday and got a splinter.

The nurse takes his hand in hers and leans close for examination. She prods the area to see if he winces, but the splinter must have worked its way out, or even gone deeper.

					NURSE
 			That's strange. I can't see any broken skin. I'll just
			get the first aid kit

She disappears for a few moments, then returns with the kit. She fossicks through the contents until she drags out a huge needle. Johnny glares at it with dread.

					JOHNNY 
 			What are you going to do with that?

					NURSE
				    (grabbing his hand)
			I'll just see if it's worked its way in.

					JOHNNY
				(taking his hand away)
 			Actually. I think it might have dissolved, or something.
			It doesn't seem to be there anymore

					NURSE
				     (rolling her eyes)
				       (usual static)
THE NEEDLE DOES IT EVERY SINGLE TIME

She replaces the needle in the kit, then dabs a little detol on the so called, splinter zone, then agrees that there doesn't seem to be a problem.

					NURSE
 			Off you go, then. If it plays up just pop back and
			we'll check it out, okay?

					JOHNNY
			   Yes, Nurse Williams. Thank you

INT.  WAITING ROOM  -  MORNING.

Johnny walks back into the waiting room, Terrence still sitting there.

					JOHNNY
			  See you, mate. Good luck.

					TERRENCE
			  Yeah, thanks. What kind of mood is she in today?

					JOHNNY
			  Good. Not her usual grouchy self.

					TERRENCE
					(usual static)
 THANK GOD FOR THAT.

Nurse Williams enters the waiting room.

					NURSE
			 So, Terrence isn't it? (openly) What's your problem.

					TERRENCE
		            (looks at Johnny, like he doesn't want him around)
			Ohh...uhhhm...
					JOHNNY
					 (exiting)
			 Anyway, I'll see you round, mate. Thanks again,
			 Nurse Williams.

EXT.  SCHOOL GROUNDS  -  MORNING.

					JOHNNY
					 (to self)
			 Boy would I hate to be in that guys shoes. Imagine
			 Nurse Williams having to...to...Oh my God, I don't
			 even want to think about it. It's bad enough having to
			 sit through her Sex Ed classes once a month.
				(he shivers with the memory)

DISSOLVE TO:

FLASHBACK SEQUENCE:

Nurse Williams is at the front of the sex ed class. Johnny and his classmates are sitting at desks, half squirming and half giggling as the nurse talks about the human reproductive process, using plastic toy dolls as educational props. 

FADE FROM FLASHBACK:

RETURN TO SCENE:

as Johnny wanders slowly back to gym, kicking the occasional stone and allowing time to elapse until the bell for morning tea sounds. He takes out micro-recorder and puts it to his mouth.

					JOHNNY
				        (into recorder)
			 Make note. Never peddle bike down hill while standing.
			 	(goes to switch off recorder, then
				 puts back to mouth)
			 P.S., accept no more roast dinner invitations at
			 Clifford's joint.

INT.  GYM CHANGING ROOM  -  MORNING.

By the time he arrives back at the gym, everyone has already changed and are on their way to the canteen or off to the quadrangle or sports oval. But when Johnny walks past the changing room showers, he sees Clifford trying to erase himself with a bar of soap and scrubbing brush.

					JOHNNY
 			(popping his head around the corner of the cubicle)
			What are you doing?

					CLIFFORD
   			        (wrapping a towel around himself)
			 I'm trying to get the germs off.

					JOHNNY
   			What germs? What happened?

					CLIFFORD
   			Mr Laidley didn't believe my story. He grabbed my
			finger with his filthy hands and twisted it to see if I
			was really hurt. Dirty mongrel. Then he made me
			climb the rope...three times!

					JOHNNY
   			Why didn't you tell Mr Laidley that you had the runs. He
 			would have understood that and probably let you out of
 			class? That stupid duck story was never gonna work.

					CLIFFORD
   			I never thought of it. Anyway, I probably do have the 
			runs now. I've scrubbed myself ten times but I think it's 
			too late. I feel a bit queasy

					JOHNNY
   			Don't worry about it. It's all in your mind. If you're not
 			crook in half an hour, then you've probably got the
			germs in time

Johnny goes over to his locker and changes into his school clothes, when suddenly he remembers the watch. He stuffs his hand deep into his bag, pulling out everything to see where it has gone. He turns the bag inside out, but the watch is missing.

					JOHNNY
 					(to Clifford)
			Did you see anyone go near my stuff?

   					CLIFFORD
					 (dressing)
 			Nah. I was in the showers. Why?

					JOHNNY
			The watch is gone! The watch has been stolen!

   					CLIFFORD
			         (rushing over to help him search)
 			It had to be Barry and Stewart. They're the only ones 
			who knew about it

					JOHNNY
   			Oh my God. What am I gonna do?

					CLIFFORD
   			Go to the head master. You'll have to dob them in.

					JOHNNY
   			Are you crazy? I can't do that. You know the procedure!
 			The parents have to be notified when a serious complaint
 			is made. If my mum or dad find out about the watch, I'm
			a dead man

					CLIFFORD
    			Well. What's the answer?

					JOHNNY
				(sits down, head in hands)
 			There's only one thing we can do. I've got to find out
			where they've hidden it and then just take it back.

					CLIFFORD
   			They've probably put it in one of their lockers.

					JOHNNY
   			Nah, no way. They're not that stupid. They know if we
 			did dob them in the first things to get raided would be them
 			and their lockers. They've either put it in one of their
 			mates lockers or hidden it around the school somewhere
   
					CLIFFORD
		   	You're gonna have to start reading some minds, starting 
			with those two losers.

   					JOHNNY
			Okay. We won't say anything to them. Let them think
 			we haven't noticed it missing, then I'll get all the info I
			need out of them and have the watch back by the end 
			of the day. Simple

					CLIFFORD
   			No prob. Let's get to morning tea, then track the big
 			moose and his weasel mate down.

INT.  CANTEEN  -  MORNING.

By the time Clifford and Johnny arrive at the canteen, most students have already been served and are sitting around talking or out playing ball. The duo make sure Mr Laidley isn't working behind the counter, then buy themselves a jam donut and small orange juice, scanning the canteen for Big Bad Barry. But he is no where to be seen. They do, however, see Stewart Simpson, Barry's best mate, walking toward the toilets over near the far corner. Johnny reads his mind.

ANGLE ON:

				STEWART SIMPSON
				      (usual static)
WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT IF I HAD THE POWER TO MAKE A WISH AND DO THE OL' SWITCHEROO WITH PEOPLE. YEAH, LIKE CELEBRITIES. I COULD JUST MAKE A WISH AND WAKE UP WITH THE GOOD THINGS THEY'VE GOT, AND THEY'D GET THE CRAP I'VE GOT. YEAH. GET MYSELF A GREAT SET OF CHOPPERS. 					
Johnny pulls a queasy face of disgust.

					CLIFFORD
			What's Stewart thinking?

					JOHNNY
		     	He's a moron, don't worry about it.

					CLIFFORD
 			Barry's probably in the dunnies, smoking. We got
			computer science next. He sits right in front of you.
			You'll be able to get the load down on him.
				          ( Clifford laughs)
			Hey. Why don't we put a dead rat in his locker?

   					JOHNNY
		             ( a devilish look of serious consideration)
 			Yeah. One of those really big fat stinky ones from
			down at the canal.
					 (beat)
			 But let's not worry about that right now. The first
			 thing we gotta do is get that watch back.

FADE OUT:

as the bell sounds and students start heading for class.

INT.  CLASSROOM  -  MORNING.

Johnny and his classmates are taking their usual seats behind a computer screen, but the seats where Barry and Stewart usual sit are empty and there is no sign of them.

Clifford and Johnny, who sit side by side, look at each other.

 					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
NOW WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?

Johnny shrugs at Clifford's thoughts. He glances over at KELLY, sitting three seats across from him and she turns to him and smiles

					JOHNNY
			  Hi, Kelly. How are you doin'?

					KELLY
		   	 Good. How was your birthday?

					JOHNNY
			 Great. Are you coming tomorrow?

					KELLY
   			Yeah, I think I should be able to make it. What
			 time does the party start?

					JOHNNY
		   	About lunch time.

The teacher, MRS. JACOBS, suddenly enters and addresses the students from the head of the class as the students begin to settle down at their work stations.

					MRS. JACOBS
			 Okay, class. Turn on your computers. Today we'll
			 be downloading system cleaning programs from the
			 Internet and learning how they're used.

As the teacher turns to write on the blackboard, Clifford leans over to Johnny.

					CLIFFORD
					(whispers) 
			Hey, Johnno, Sally's behind ya. I'll get up and go
 			and get something and you ask her something about me.
			See what she thinks.

Clifford gets up and moves away, then Johnny waits for the right moment and swivels on his chair to face SALLY.

					JOHNNY 
					 (softly)
			Hi, Sally. You coming tomorrow? Clifford will
			be there

					SALLY
				         (usual static)
WHY WOULD I CARE IF CLIFFORD'S COMING? MAYBE YOU AND ME CAN HAVE A DANCE.
			Yeah, great. I'm looking forward to it

Johnny  blushes.

					SALLY(cont)
					 (usual static)
YOU'RE SO CUTE. WHEN ARE YOU GONNA ASK ME OUT ON A PROPER DATE?
 
Johnny returns to his computer just as Clifford resumes his seat.

					CLIFFORD
					 (whispers)
			 Well. What's the go, Mo?

Johnny pretends to be having trouble getting his computer booted up to give himself time to think of an appropriate reply.

					JOHNNY
					(whispers)
 			Yeah, she like you. Trouble is, she like a couple of
			other guys too

					CLIFFORD
					(whispers)
			Who?

 					JOHNNY
					(whispers)
  			She never actually thought their names. Just thought it
 			was a toss up

					CLIFFORD
					 (whispers)
   			Oh well. At least I'm in with a chance, hey?

					JOHNNY
					(whispers)
   			Yeah, no probs. I'll find out what things she likes later 
			and give you the heads up, okay?

					CLIFFORD
			Beauty. Thanks, Johnno
				 (returns attention to computer)

Johnny gives an anguished, miserable gaze toward the heavens for a few moments, wondering if things could possibly get any worse. Then he comes back to his senses and switches on the computer.

The class is a complete waste of time to Johnny, as far as learning anything is concerned, his mind a muddle. He is reading kids minds left right and centre, just by directing his attention their way. BOBBY McAVANEY is thinking about Kelly. PETE CONROY is thinking about Kelly too, and so is ADAM WEISS. The three guys are thinking about her in different ways. Bobby is thinking about how she'd look in a bikini. Pete is thinking about leaving her an anonymous note, saying she has a secret admirer and Adam is thinking about asking her out on a date.
Johnny slowly turns to see what Kelly is doing. Nothing much. Just fiddling around with the computer mouse, getting on with her project. She really is the most beautiful girl in the class, if not the entire school.

					KELLY
				        (usual static)
THIS STUPID COMPUTER. I HATE THESE THINGS. I WANT TO BE A POLICE WOMAN, NOT A COMPUTER OPERATOR.

					JOHNNY
			          (returns to screen, eyes gleaming)
				      (mutters to self)
			So, Kelly wants to be a cop...

Clifford thinks he heard Johnny say something and turns to him.

					CLIFFORD
			 Hey? What was that, Johnno?

					JOHNNY
					 (startled)
			 What? Oh. Nothing.

They both go back to their screens, when all of a sudden Johnny's eyes bulge from his head as something dawns on him. He realises that Barry has probably taken the watch to the pawn brokers. Whilst On Line, he quickly dismisses the class project and checks for local pawn shops. 

C.U.: on computer screen, showing pawn brokers.

Johnny writes down the address of the nearest broker and puts it in his pocket. 

FADE IN AND OUT:

on JOHNNY'S FACE and the WALL CLOCK, which seems to be going slower and slower and even backward, beads of sweat growing on Johnny's brow, teeth clenched, eyes wide. 

Eventually class ends. Johnny grabs Clifford on his way out of class.

INT.  CORRIDOR -  MORNING.

					JOHNNY
   			Cliff. We've got to get to the pawn shop to see 
			where my mum's watch has gotten to. There's one
			just down the road. I bet you a million
 			bucks that Barry's sold it. We've got to track it down.
 			We'll be back before next class. Are you with me?

					CLIFFORD
   			Yeah of course. But what happens if he has hocked it?
 			We've got no cash. How do we get it back?

					JOHNNY
		   	I don't know yet. We'll have to figure that out when we
			get there.

FADE OUT:

on Johnny and Clifford rushing down corridor.

INT.  PAWN BROKERS  -  MIDDAY.

They casually walk into the pawn shop. There are no other customers and the BROKER is a shifty, dubious looking character of about fifty and when he blinks, he blinks very, very hard, both eyes at the same time. It's as if  he has an uncontrollable, physiological tic. 

					BROKER
			 So. What can I do for you boys?

					JOHNNY
			 Hello. We were just wondering if you got any ladies
			 watches. Anything good come in today?

					BROKER
			 Nah, nothing new today. But I got a whole bunch in
			 that cabinet over there. How much you wanna spend?
				         (usual static)
WELL NOW. THIS SHOULD BE A BIT OF FUN. LET'S SEE IF I'VE STILL GOT THE OL', "TAKING CANDY FROM A BABY" KNACK. SEE IF I CAN'T SEPARATE THESE LITTLE TOW RAGS FROM THEIR LUNCH MONEY.

The broker walks around to behind the glass cabinet.

					BROKER (cont)
			 What about this one. Only ten bucks. Gilded fourteen
			 carat gold, water proof to thirty metres and shock resistant.
			 Costs a hundred and twenty dollars brand new. I was gonna
			 sell it for forty. But you look like good kids and I'm willing to
			 do you the deal of a life time. What do you reckon? Just ten 			 		 bucks. I'm not jokin'. Armstrong wore this brand on
			 the moon.
					(usual static)
I PAID TWENTY DOLLARS FOR TEN OF THESE STUPID THINGS IN BALI TWO YEARS AGO. BLOODY THINGS GAIN EIGHT MINUTES A DAY. 

					JOHNNY
			(cannily, sincerely, yet annoyed at the man's deceit)
			 Gee, it looks very nice, sir. But we haven't got ten dollars.
			 We've only got a couple of bucks. We've been saving for
			 a week now. We've had to go without lunch to save
			 it for our Aunt Maggie. She's dying in hospital and we
			 just thought we'd do something nice for her before
			 she...you know...

					BROKER
			       (2 beat, weighs up the situation)
					(usual static)
IS THIS KID PULLING A FAST ONE OR WHAT? HE'D HAVE TO GET UP PRETTY EARLY IN THE MORNING TO PULL THE WOOL OVER OL' MACKA'S EYES. THAT'S FOR SURE.

					JOHNNY
				       (turning to leave)
			  Anyway, thanks, Macka.

					BROKER
			  Hang on. How'd you know my name?

					JOHNNY
			 Aunt Maggie used to shop here all the time. She told us
			 about your trip to Bali and what a top bloke you are, you
			 know, that kind of stuff.
			 
					BROKER
				           (usual static)
BLOODY HELL. NOW I FEEL LIKE THE BIGGEST TURD IN THE WORLD. BUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME, I JUST CAN'T PICTURE A WOMAN NAMED MAGGIE.
			How old was...I mean...is your aunt?

					JOHNNY
			 About fifty. Solid lady with greying hair.

					BROKER
				    (wracking his brain)
				          (usual static)
STILL DOESN'T RING A BELL.
			Look. (handing over the watch) Why don't you
			just take this. I'm not gonna miss it.

					JOHNNY
			 No, thanks. It's okay.

					BROKER
			 How long has your aunt got to...you know?

					JOHNNY
				   (about to exit with Clifford)
			 Not long. A few weeks maybe.

					BROKER
				       (look of dismay)
			 I tell you what. 
				(takes out a better watch)
			 Take this one. I insist.

					JOHNNY
			 No, honestly. Thank you. But it doesn't really matter.
			 Come to think of it, a watch isn't such a good idea
			 anyway. She's practically totally blind now. She
			 wouldn't be able to tell the time.

					BROKER
				      (ashen with grief)
				         (usual static)
  HOLY CRAP. I THINK I'M GONNA START CRYIN'.
			 You know what. I got a really nice bracelet
			 here. Maybe she'd like that instead?

					JOHNNY
				         (shaking head)
			 That's very kind of you, but that probably isn't a good
			 idea either, actually.

The broker starts to blink even harder, but now he does it only one eye at a time, as if he's got to keep an eye on what is being said. Clifford is confused by the man's facial expressions. Clifford frowns, looking around nervously. He thinks the guy is winking at him, or giving him somekind of signal. Clifford's confusion keeps him silent.

					BROKER
			 How come?

					JOHNNY 
				     (convincingly sincere)
			 Her arms got crushed in the accident.

					BROKER
				    (nearly falling over)
			 What? What accident?

					JOHNNY
				        (sad pretence)
			 She got hit by the number seven bus a couple of
			 weeks ago.

					BROKER
			 Bloody hell!

					JOHNNY
			 Anyway, thank you, sir. See you.

					BROKER
					(mortified)
			 Yeah...yeah....see you guys...good luck...and give
			 my best to your...aunt...Maggie.

EXT.  STREET  -  DAY.

Johnny and Clifford exit shop and slowly walk down street.

					CLIFFORD
				            (to Johnny)
		            What was that all about? Who's Aunt whatsername?

					JOHNNY
			 Nobody. I just made it all up to make him feel bad
			 because he was trying to do the dirty on us. He paid
			 two bucks for that watch in Bali. It's one of those
			 el-cheapo jobs.

					CLIFFORD
			 Really? Geez, he fooled me. The ol', cross eyed git. 
			 I believed every word. Except that part about it
			 makin' your arm strong on the moon. I knew that
			 was bull dust. Lucky we've got your zappy powers.

					JOHNNY
				       (quizzical look)
			 He didn't mean it makes...
				(pulls pained face, then 
			 	decides to drop the subject)
			 Anyway, get this for a joke. The watch gains
			 eight minutes a day. It's worthless.

					CLIFFORD
					(very serious)
			 Really? Eight minutes a day? That works out
			 to 48.6 hours a year. Wearing that watch would be
			 ridiculous. As the year crawled on you'd be spending
			 half your life calculating where you are and where you
			 should be.

					JOHNNY
			       (stops to face Clifford in amazement)
			You know what. I think you're one of those idiot
			 savant people.
 
					CLIFFORD
			 A what?

					JOHNNY
			 You know. One of those people who's brilliant at one
			 subject and not so good at others. You see. I'm average
			 at every subject, right. But you, you're as fast as a
			 calculator at maths, but no good at English and Social Studies
			 and common sense kind of things. I mean, why not just
			 rewind the watch 8 minutes a day? Then you wouldn't
			 have to do any calculating at all, would you?

					CLIFFORD 
			 Hmmm, yeah, I suppose you're right. What are
			 those people called again?

					JOHNNY
			 An idiot savant. It means a kind of genius. A lot
			 of great people are like that.

They start walking side by side down the road.

					CLIFFORD
			 Really?
					   (beat)
			 You know what? Towards the end there,
			 that guy was about to give you anything you wanted.

    					JOHNNY
			 I know. But I just didn't feel right, you know, using
			 zappy to rip him off. Even as shifty as he is.

					CLIFFORD
			 What if he did have your mum's watch? What
			 would you have done then?

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know. That might have been a different story.
			 Anyway, what do we do now?

					CLIFFORD
			Don't know. Where's the next pawn shop?

					JOHNNY
			 Miles away. On the other side of town. It'd take two
			 bus rides to get there.

					CLIFFORD
			 Barry's never caught a bus in his life. He doesn't think
			 it's cool being seen on a public bus.

					JOHNNY
			 Hmmm...

					CLIFFORD
                                   You know what! Barry's dad owns an auto wrecking
 			yard in the industrial estate. Barry spends half his life
			at that joint.

					JOHNNY
   		            Yeah. Let's go and check it out.

HIGH SHOT:

as pair walk briskly away from camera, their voices fading as they wander off into the distance. 

					CLIFFORD (V.O.)
   			What happens if you read his mind and he's got it in
			 his pocket? What then?

					JOHNNY (V.O.)
		   	I don't know. You might have to hit him on the head
			with a spanner or something. Then I'll grab it and we'll 
			make a run for it.

					CLIFFORD (V.O.) 								Woooo,woooo,woooo, woooo. What do you mean,
 			I'LL have to hit him on the head? I'm not hitting anyone
 			on the head with anything. Especially Big Bad Barry. If
			it's in his pocket, then you hit him on the head.

					JOHNNY (V.O.)
               		Hmmm yeah, that's probably not such a good idea.
			Better to just play it cool and see what happens.

EXT.  WRECKING YARD  -  MIDDAY. 

At the run down, seen better years wrecking yard, people are coming and going with used parts for their cars. Johnny and Clifford walk past all kinds of wrecks, watching people inspecting and taking parts off cars. The four acre yard is filled with all kinds of cars and wrecks, surrounding an old run down office in the very centre of the yard.

INT. OFFICE  -  MIDDAY.

Johnny and Clifford walk into the small office in the centre of the yard. BARRY'S DAD, a huge man in overalls behind the service counter, smiles pleasantly at the pair.

					DAD
 			Gidday, boys. How you doin'?

   					JOHNNY
			Hello. We're Barry's mates. We were just wondering if 
			you've seen him?

					DAD
   			Yeah, sure. He was here about twenty minutes ago.
 			He put something in the safe. I think he's gone back
			to school. Why, what's the prob?

Johnny and Clifford exchange looks.

					JOHNNY
					  (to dad)
                    		Nothing. We were just looking for him.

Through the corner of his eye, Johnny sees the safe in the far corner of the office, covered with old newspapers and the odd spare part. It is the size of a huge television set, a big green thing with a combination dial in the centre of the door and a handle at the side.

 					JOHNNY (cont)
					(cunningly)
			My dad was going to buy a safe like that. But he
			reckons all those types of safes have the same
			combination.

					DAD
				(turning to see the safe)
				      (usual static)
TWENTY SEVEN RIGHT, FOURTEEN LEFT, THIRTY ONE RIGHT.
			I doubt that very much lad. Those safes are made
 			by the biggest safe company in the world. If they
 			made all the combos the same, then who'd buy them?

					JOHNNY
   			Yeah, I suppose you're right. Anyway. We'd better get
 			going. We'll catch up with Barry at school.

					DAD
   			You got it. Take it easy lads

EXT. WRECKING YARD  - MORNING.
 
The pair walk from the yard. Clifford voices the obvious.

					CLIFFORD
 			Barry has put the watch in his dad's safe. He's probably
 			gonna wait till things cool off before he hocks it.

					JOHNNY
			 I know. But we're gonna get to it before he does.

					CLIFFORD
			How?

					JOHNNY
   			I got the combination. All we have to do is sneak back
 			here tonight, break in and get it.

					CLIFFORD
				 (stops dead in his tracks)
 			What? Have you lost your mind? If we get caught busting
 			and entering, we'll end up in jail, not to mention getting the
 			death degree from our parents!

					JOHNNY
  			 Look, Cliff. What else can we do? This is our only chance
 			 at getting the watch back. Now, are you going to help
			 me or not?
		
					CLIFFORD
				( looking anything but certain)
 			Yeah, alright. I must be crazy, but hey, what are best
			buddies for. How are we going to do it? What if there's
			an alarm system?

					JOHNNY
  			I read his dad's thoughts. There is no alarm system in the
			office. They lock all the valuable stuff in a garage on the 					other side of the yard and he takes the till money home
 			after work. We'll just sneak out tonight about nine o'clock.
 			Take our bikes, climb the fence, then get into the office and
			open the safe. No-one'll be any the wiser. We won't take
			anything that doesn't belong to us, just the watch. I'll put it 
			back where it belongs and that's the end of the story.

					CLIFFORD 
			What if Barry grabs the watch after school today?

					JOHNNY
			 I doubt it. Why would he put it there in the first place?
			 But just to make sure, when we get back we'll read his
			 thoughts. See what he's planning.

  					CLIFFORD
			 Yeah alright. And while you're at it, can you find out what
			 Sally likes? You know, so I can put some ground work in.

EXT.  SCHOOL GROUNDS  -  AFTERNOON.

They arrive back just as their classmates are heading off to English. Still no sign of Barry or Stewart.

INT.  CLASS ROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

MRS COSGROVE, the English teacher turns to the black board and begins writing a sentence. As she writes, Johnny reads her mind. She is going to ask Clifford which of the words in the sentence is a verb. Clifford sits directly to Johnny's right, and fully aware that Clifford has trouble with English, Johnny grabs his attention.

					JOHNNY
					  (softly)
 			Cliff. Hey Cliff. The answer is the second word,
			okay?

Clifford looks perplexed, then he realises what is about to happen.

The sentence reads, "Peter ran to the park."

					MRS COSGROVE
			(turning and pointing straight at Clifford)
 			Clifford, which word in this sentence is the verb?

   					CLIFFORD 
				     (ponders for effect)
			The second word, Mrs Cosgrove.

 					MRS COSGROVE
					   (surprised) 
			Very good, Clifford. So you've been doing some 						homework, have you?

She turns and starts another sentence. Johnny holds up three fingers to Clifford before she turns back to the class and points straight at Clifford.

The sentence reads, "Peter, John and Mary are family."

					MRS COSGROVE 
			Okay, Clifford, which word is the conjunction?

					CLIFFORD
			The third word, Mrs Cosgrove.

He gives the correct answer two more times until finally she gives another student a hard time, who seems to have just as much trouble with words as Clifford.

					JOHNNY
		       (whispers to Sally, sitting behind him and to the left)
			English is boring, isn't it. I wish they'd do subjects
			that we really like, like our favourite hobbies.

					SALLY
			Yeah. That'd be great.
				        (usual static)
LIKE INSECTS. I'M GOING TO STUDY ENTOMOLOGY WHEN I GET TO UNI.
 
Johnny turns back to face the front of class, he waits until the right moment, when everyone has their faces buried in books and the teacher is at the black board, then he grabs Clifford's attention again.

					JOHNNY
					 (softly) 
			She loves insects. She wants to be an entomologist.

   					CLIFFORD
				         (eyes lighting up)
					(usual static)
 YOU BEAUTY. I NEVER REALLY CARED FOR BUGS. BUT I DO NOW.

 					JOHNNY
					(raises hand)
			Mrs Cosgrove. I was just wondering. How good do
			our grades have to be in English to join the police
			force?

All heads turn his way, including Kelly, a look of surprise on her face.

					MRS COSGROVE
 			Your English passes have to be excellent, Johnny. I
			 never knew you wanted to join the police force. I
			 thought you wanted to be a computer programmer?

					JOHNNY
   			Oh yeah, I still want to study computer programming.
			But I'd like to be a policeman for a while just to see
			if I can make a difference.

					MRS COSGROVE
   			That's very commendable, Johnny. Does anyone else
			here want to join the police force?

   Only one hand shoots up. Kelly's.

					KELLY
 			I've wanted to be a police officer ever since I can
			remember.

					MRS COSGROVE
   			Well. I'm sure you two will have no trouble 
			getting into the force with your grades. Trust me.

   All of a sudden, Clifford's hand goes up.

					CLIFFORD
			 What about ento-nom-ogy, Mrs Cosgrove?

					MRS COSGROVE 
					(frowning)
			What?

					CLIFFORD
           (Aware that he has made a very serious error of pronunciation suddenly gulps)
					(usual static)
OH MY GOD. WHAT HAVE I DONE. WHY COULDN'T I JUST KEEP MY BIG MOUTH SHUT. THIS ISN'T A MATHS CLASS. THIS IS ENGLISH.

BOBBY TYLER, sitting in the front row, turns around to face Clifford, a look of disdain on his face.

					BOBBY
 			What the hell is that?
				     (with mockery)
			The study of garden gnomes?

Johnny is looking at Clifford in awe, mouth half open as he awaits an onslaught of humiliation for his best friend. But suddenly the teacher simply comes to Clifford's rescue.

				     MRS COSGROVE
 			Oh. You mean "entomology". The study of insects.
			Science is where your grades have to be good to
			become an entomologist. But don't forget everyone, it's
			no good trying to get a degree in anything if your English
			is poor. Okay, let's get back to work, shall we?

DISSOLVE TO: 

end of class.

INT.  SCHOOL CORRIDOR  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny and Clifford start roaming the corridors, asking kids if they have seen Barry, talking as they go.

					JOHNNY
					(to Clifford)
 			You idiot. What were you thinking? You nearly
			made a complete ass of yourself. The word's
			entomology. Got it?

   					CLIFFORD
			How red was my face? It wasn't too bad was it?

					JOHNNY
   			Nah, you  had a bit of a red faced joe, but nothing to
			worry about.

					CLIFFORD
			 Geez, what was Sally thinking about me? I noticed
			 her looking my way.

					JOHNNY
			 She was a bit confused. At first she thought you were
 			 the biggest stooge in the world. But after it got sorted 
			 out, she started wondering if you had a butterfly
			 collection.

					CLIFFORD
			 A butterfly collection? What's that?

					JOHNNY
			 You know. A type of board with butterflies pinned
			  to it.

					CLIFFORD
			 Where am I gonna get my hands on one of them?

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know. Why not make one yourself. Just get
			 a net and catch your own butterflies.

					CLIFFORD
					 (frowning)
					(usual static)
YOU GOTTA BE JOKING. IF I GET SEEN RUNNING AROUND WITH A NET CATCHING BUTTERFLIES, I MAY AS WELL WEAR A FAIRY PRINCESS OUTFIT TO SCHOOL.

					JOHNNY
				 (responding to Clifford's thoughts)
			 Yeah, chasing butterflies may not be a good look.
					 (shrugs) 
			 But then again, how bad do you want to go out with 
			 Sally?

					CLIFFORD
			 Hmmm. What about a bug collection. You know, 
			 instead of butterflies, I collect a bunch of bugs?
			 Reckon that'd work?

					JOHNNY
			 Maybe. It's worth a try.

They bump into a KID who knows where Barry is.  

					KID
			 He's up in the gym with Mr Laidley. I think Mr
			 Laidley wants him to join the school gymnastics
			 team.

					CLIFFORD
					 (to Johnny)
			 We've got music next class. No one'll notice us
			 missing. Let's get up to the gym and suss it out.

INT.  GYMNASIUM  -  DAY.

The duo enter the gym hall, just as the bell sounds for classes. As they creep inside, they see Mr Laidley and Barry at the parallel bars, over near the far wall. No-one else is present, the rest of the gym hall empty. Barry is dressed in his gym wear and Mr Laidley is motioning to Barry how the bars are used. The teacher and Barry are quite a distance from where Johnny and Clifford are peeping around a corner, about thirty metres away. Not far from Johnny and Clifford, up against the wall, is the school vaulting horse, out of sight of the teacher and Barry.

					CLIFFORD
			 What's Barry thinking?

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know. He's too far away. I can't get a bead
			 on him. Hey. Let's get inside the vaulting horse and
			 shimmy our way over, a bit closer. I'll be able to look
			 through the slits to see what Barry's thinking.  

					CLIFFORD
					 (skeptically)
			 Are you sure that's a good idea? What if we get caught?

					JOHNNY
			 We won't get caught. We've just got to get a few metres 
			 closer until I can pick up the big idiot's thoughts. He's
 			 probably thinking about the watch right now.

The pair creep over to the horse and raise the top quarter, removable section and slide inside, gently lowering the padded lid back over to cover themselves. They then manoeuvre the horse around so Johnny can see through one of the hand hold slots at the long end of the horse. When the teacher and Barry are not looking, Johnny instructs Clifford to push the horse along the wooden floor toward the target, changing P.O.V. from inside horse to outside horse as they go. They get to within about five metres, but Barry is constantly moving out of view of the slot, not allowing Johnny a clear view of him.

					CLIFFORD 
				(inside horse, in softish voice)
			  Well. What's he thinking?

Johnny's P.O.V. through slot.
					JOHNNY
				         (inside horse)
			  I don't know. He keeps moving.

Suddenly Clifford farts, a long, medium loud trumpet sound. Johnny turns to him, a look of anguish on his face as he tries to hold his breath.

					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
SORRY MATE. IT MUST HAVE BEEN THAT SALAD SANDWICH I HAD FOR LUNCH ...OR MAYBE... 

					JOHNNY
			(inside horse, responding to Clifford's thoughts)
			 Or maybe what?

					CLIFFORD
					(inside horse)
			 Or maybe Mr Laidley gave me the runs. I don't feel so 
			 good.     
				  (we hear a tummy rumble)
			 Actually. I think I may have dropped a gomer in my
			 duds.

Johnny's P.O.V. as he tries stuffing his nose out through the small slit for some fresh air.

										CUT TO:

Outside horse, with Johnny's nose squeezing through slot.

										CUT TO:
 
TWO MEN, dressed in overalls coming into the gym hall, pushing a long, six wheeler trolley. They approach the teacher. They are here to take the vaulting horse away to be repaired.

					FIRST DELIVERY MAN
					      (to teacher) 
			 Hi. We're here to pick up the vaulting horse. We
			 gotta take it down town to get it revarnished and 
			 reupholstered.

					MR LAIDLEY
			 Yeah, sure guys. It's over there near the wa...Oh,
			 here it is just here. Have it back by next week, okay?

					FIRST DELIVERY MAN
			 Yep. No prob.

The two men push the trolley under the horse, Clifford and Johnny lifting their feet until they are standing on the trolley with the horse covering them.

EXT.  STREET  -  AFTERNOON.

The two men push the trolley from the gym hall to the back of their truck out in the street, atop a steep hill. The first man goes to the front of the truck, telling his colleague to get inside the back of the truck and make some room. While they are busy, the trolley with horse and duo inside starts rolling down the hill, in the centre of the not so vehicle busy street. It picks up speed with Johnny's P.O.V. looking through the front slit.

										CUT TO:

Iniside horse, the looks of uncertainty on the kids faces.

					CLIFFORD 
			 Hey. What's goin' on?

					JOHNNY
			 Hang on. We're on the move.

										CUT TO:

Outside horse, as the trolley picks up speed, weaving in and out of traffic. It bounds through an intersection and over a slight hill, forcing the lid to bounce off. Johnny and Clifford stand up, hanging on like they are riding a bob sled. At the end of the street is a church, a slight concrete ramp leading up to the front doors, directly in their path. The pair are screaming with terror.

										CUT TO:

Johnny's P.O.V: as he sees the fast approaching church at the end of the road.

INT.   CHURCH  -   DAY.

Inside the church and unaware what is coming, a funeral is in progress, a coffin sitting in the middle of the aisle, just in front of the altar, a bunch of mourners sitting on the pews while a EULOGY READER is reading from the pulpit.

					EULOGY READER
			 Old Mrs Mc Dowell was a kind and gentle woman, a
			 lady who lived a quiet and respectful life, who minded
			 her own business and kept very much to herself. Some
			 say she lived a very uneventful life...

										CUT TO:

The vaulting horse, as it screams into the church and down the aisle, smashing into the stand bearing the coffin, Johnny and Clifford screaming at the top of their lungs. The horse and trolley bump the coffin off it's stand and the coffin bounces up against the altar and stands almost vertical, the lid facing Clifford and Johnny as they are thrust to the end of the vaulting horse. The crowd is deathly silent, and so are Clifford and Johnny now as the lid of the coffin slowly drops open, revealing an embalmed dead woman. The body slowly falls forward, onto the stand from which the coffin had sat.

FADE OUT:

on Clifford and Johnny screaming with terror as they leap from the horse and bolt from the church, the onlookers wide eyed in silent disbelief.

INT.  JOHNNY'S LOUNGE ROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny walks in through the front door, looking bedraggled and worn out.

					MOTHER
			 Hi, darling. You hungry?

					JOHNNY
		   	 No, Mum. I'm right.

					MOTHER
   			Are you okay? You look a little flushed.

   					JOHNNY
			I'm fine. Just had a bit of a hectic day at school,
		            that's all. I think I'd better go to my room for a bit
			of a lie down.

					MOTHER
			Okay, darling. I wish you wouldn't push yourself
			so hard. Your grades are great. Take things easy.
			for a while.

					JOHNNY
					 (wearily)
			Yes, mum.

FADE OUT:

on Johnny dragging himself up the stairs.

INT.  BEDROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny is laying on the bed, looking very forlorn and exhausted, staring at the ceiling. Eventually he takes out his micro-recorder and puts it to his mouth.

					JOHNNY
				       (into recorder)
					 (sighs)
			 What a day. This is all getting to be a bit too much.
					 (beat)
			 First I lose my mum's watch, then I find out Sally
			 likes me and not Cliff, then I practically ruin an old
			 ladies funeral...not that it mattered to her, I suppose,
			 but geez. Hope it turned out alright. Hmmm, and what
			 about Sally? How do I get her off my case?
			 Anyway, first things first. I've got to get that stupid
			 watch back and put it back where it belongs.

FADE OUT: 

on Johnny putting recorder back in his pocket, then draping an arm over his eyes as he drifts off to sleep.

EXT.  HOUSE  -  NIGHT.
  
ON:

Johnny as he sneaks out through his bedroom window and climbs down a drain pipe. He grabs his bike and starts off toward Clifford's place.

EXT.  STREET  -  NIGHT.

Johnny meets Clifford outside Cliff's house, both dressed in dark clothing, minus balaclavas.

					JOHNNY
			 You ready?

					CLIFFORD
			 Ready as we'll ever be.

They head off, riding their bikes down the street.

EXT.  PADDOCK  -  NIGHT.

They pull up at the rear of the wrecking yard, the rear of the property backing up to a small, empty paddock. There is a half moon, but the surroundings are quite dark. They lean their bikes against the two metre tall tin fence. Johnny stands on his seat to get a hand hold on the tin edge of the fence. Clifford hands him an old stick and Johnny wedges it between the first layer of barbed wire and the top of the fence to make a gap to climb through. Johnny climbs over first, and moments later Clifford follows.

EXT. WRECKING YARD  -  NIGHT.

Johnny turns on his penlight torch and they sneak silently to the front of the blackened, deserted office, situated in the centre of the yard. There are no security lights, just a single globe hanging from a cable near the front gates giving off very little light to the rest of the yard. The door is shut and secured fast. They push and prod, and even use a piece of wire to try to crack the lock, but there is no way it will open. Then Clifford tries the nearby window and it simply pops open. Johnny slides his hand around and unlatches the door.

INT.  OFFICE  -  NIGHT.

They enter, the torch picking up the contents of the office, old seats and batteries and mechanical parts laying all over the place. They make their way into the small alcove where the safe sits and Johnny bends down onto his knees, rubbing his fingers together like he is a professional safe cracker. He then takes the dial in his right hand and turns the tumblers into place. He takes hold of the solid steel handle and turns it until the safe pops open. The two mates smile at each other

					CLIFFORD
			If we don't make it as computer programmers we
			could make a fortune as safe crackers. Or are you
			dinkum joining the police force?

					JOHNNY
			No, you idiot. I was only saying that 'cause I knew 
			Kelly wants to join.

The safe is filled with nothing more than paper work and the odd computer disk, but sitting atop is a brown paper bag with Barry's name written on it, as if his dad had made his lunch and Barry was so stupid a name had to be applied so Big Bad Barry knew which was his. Johnny reaches in and grabs the bag, just as a strange growling sound comes from outside, not far from the office door. The duo glance at one another, until the sound becomes more insistent. Johnny gulps. He quickly slams the safe door shut and spins the dial, before leaping to his feet and heading for the door.

					JOHNNY
			 Did you hear that?

					CLIFFORD
   			Yeah. We'd better get out of here.

EXT.  WRECKING YARD  -  NIGHT.

They scan the immediate area outside with the beam of the small torch, then walk out and close the door behind them. They are about to make a controlled dash for the back fence when all of a sudden the torch beam picks up the beady eyes of a big black Doberman watch dog, standing about ten metres away, right in the middle of their path. Before either Johnny or Clifford can react, the dog starts to bound toward them, the growling growing into violent mayhem. In a flash, Johnny and Clifford leap into the air and land on the bonnet of a nearby, half wrecked Volkswagen, then leap once again to the roof of the car, while all the while keeping a bead on the dog below, it's jaws drooling, eyes fixated on the targets above whilst running around the car to try and get up, only to slip off time and time again.

					CLIFFORD
   			Holy Moly, it's a dirty big watch dog!

Johnny holds the beam on the animal, his mind racing.

					CLIFFORD (cont)
   			What are we gonna do? We're trapped!

All of a sudden, Johnny notices that the contents of the paper bag he has swiped from the safe is somehow disfigured. In his panic he had squished the contents and this puzzles him. He lowers the beam of the torch and opens the bag, only to see a half squished, pink iced donut. He holds it out for Clifford to see.

					JOHNNY
				(highlighting it with the torch)
			 Look at this.

					CLIFFORD
   			What kind of a person puts a donut in a safe?'

					JOHNNY
		   	I don't know! Obviously a big, donut eating mental 						person.

					CLIFFORD
   			That's amazing. He must really love pink donuts.
			Maybe we should dip it in the dunny and put it
			back in the safe?

Then, as if to remind him of their current dilemma, Johnny simply shines the torch on the dog below, still eager to get up and at them.

					JOHNNY
 			Hey, I got an idea.
				 (breaks the donut in half)
			I'll toss some of the donut over that way and see if the
			dog gets it, then, if he does, I'll wait till he comes back
			and hoik the other piece right over there past the office,
			then you and me can make a dash for it. Okay?

					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE A VERY GOOD IDEA TO ME. HAVE YOU SEEN HOW FAST THESE THINGS CAN RUN. WHY DON'T WE JUST WAIT UNTIL IT FALLS ASLEEP?

					JOHNNY
				(shaking his head intolerantly) 
			It's a watch dog. They don't sleep. Why have a watch
 			dog if it sleeps?

Clifford starts wringing his hands nervously, his eyes wide with terror.

					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
YEAH OKAY. ALL I HAVE TO DO IS MAKE SURE I RUN FASTER THAN JOHNNY.

					JOHNNY
   		   	 I heard that, Cliff.

					CLIFFORD
   			Sorry. I'm not thinking straight at the moment. Hey, 
			can you read the dog's mind?

					JOHNNY
			(curiously, aims the beam and concentrates)
 			Nah, I can't read a thing with that stupid mongrel.
			But I can tell by the look on his face what he's gonna
			do if he catches us.

Johnny throws the first piece of donut and the dog chases it. The dog eats then returns. Johnny teases him for a few moments to really get his attention. He leans down to give the dog a real good look, then tosses the donut about twenty metres away, landing just on the other side of the office. The dog chases it, then the two mates jump from the car and bolt to the fence, but as they arrive, they realise they have no bikes to use to gain that extra height to grab the fence. They look at each other, then back to where they had last seen the dog. So far so good. No dog. Then they hear the padded foot steps as the dog starts returning to the Volkswagen and Johnny can clearly read Clifford's horror, simply because he himself is feeling it too. Then the beam of the torch picks up several spare wheels lying around, near the fence. Without saying a word, but working as though they had, they grab the wheels and stack them three high next to where they had wedged the stick under the barbed wire. Then, in a flash they leap up and over, dropping to the other side in utter exhaustion.

EXT.  PADDOCK  -  NIGHT.

					CLIFFORD
   		            So. What happened to the watch?

					JOHNNY
   		 	Don't know. I got no idea.

					CLIFFORD
			Maybe we're beating up the wrong tree

					JOHNNY
			What do you mean?

					CLIFFORD
   			Let's face it. We've got no proof that Barry actually
			took it. It's not in the hock shop, it's not in the safe.
			What if Stewart took it and Barry has nothing to
			do with it?

					JOHNNY
   			I don't know what's going on. All I do know is the
			watch is missing and when my parents find out, I'm
			a goner. The only way we're gonna find out for sure
			is to ask Barry and Stewart straight out on Monday,
			and see who took it. Then, when we find out what
			happened to it, we'll figure out a way to get it back.

					CLIFFORD
   			Anyway. Let's get outta here and get home before
			our oldies find out we're M.I.B.

					JOHNNY
					(frowning)
			 Don't you mean MIA? Missing In Action?

					CLIFFORD
			 Nah, I mean Missing In Bed.

INT.  BEDROOM   -  NIGHT

Johnny is asleep in bed.

There are several dream sequences in the script which include well known celebrities. For the sake of convenience the players herein are purely incidental. The actual celebrities will be based on the producers discretion.

FADE TO: 

DREAM SEQUENCE:

We open with  BERT NEWTON or maybe JOHN FARNHAM - getting out of bed in the morning and going into the bathroom in his pajamas. He looks at himself in the mirror and after a few moments he sees his teeth, the same as STEWART SIMPSON'S teeth. (Johnny reliving the thoughts Stewart had had earlier that day about switching things with celebs) Bert's eyes go wide with disbelief. Then his wife walks in and Bert turns to her and shows his rotten teeth. She looks equally shocked.

					WIFE
			What have you done to yourself?

					BERT
			What do you mean, what have I done to myself?
			 I haven't done anything. I just went to bed.

					WIFE
			You'd better call a dentist! You've got a show to
			do in an hour.

					BERT
			(looking back into mirror-camera)
			A dentist! I don't need a dentist, I need a priest!

										CUT TO: 

Stewart Simpson waltzing through the school yard, a big, beautiful smile on his face. He goes straight over to Kelly and gives her a big kiss.

RETURN TO SCENE:

Johnny wakes up in his bedroom, startled. A few moments later he lays back in bed and goes back to sleep.

INT.  KITCHEN/DINING ROOM  -  MORNING.

During breakfast the next day, Saturday, Johnny watches his brother eating his cereal, thinking his usual inane thoughts about his favourite breakfast cereal. His father gives them both their twenty dollar allowance then continues out to set up the B.B.Q. During breakfast, Johnny has a niggling memory of how last year his brother ruined the day by embarrassing him and his friends during the party, playing his usual pranks and using his seniority to control the events of the day. And after Johnny reads exactly what his brother has planned for this year's party, he decides he has to try and put an end to it

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
YEAH, YOU BEAUTY. I'LL DACK EVERY SINGLE KID JUST BEFORE THEY JUMP INTO THE POOL, AND THEN GIVE THE OL' GRAND CANYON WEDGIE TO THOSE WHO DON'T GO IN. YEAH. THAT SHOULD LIVEN THINGS UP A BIT.

C.U.: on Johnny's fearful eyes.

					JOHNNY
			Hey, Al. After breakfast, do you wanna play
			some poker?

   					ALAN
					(grinning)
				          (usual static)
WHAT? I WIN EVERY TIME. TALK ABOUT A FLY TO A WEB.
			Yeah, okay. But when...I mean, if I win, you can't
 			 go off crying to mummy or daddy.

INT.  DEN  -  MORNING.

They retire to their father's den, taking a brand new deck of cards from the top draw of the desk. They sit either side of the desk and Alan produces a box of matches. He pours out forty sticks and divides them into piles of twenty each, representing one dollar each. Then he shuffles the cards.

					ALAN
 			Okay. Full deck poker. No cards are wild. Minimum
 			bet a dollar, maximum bet five.

   					JOHNNY
 			Yep. So let me get this straight. The first person to get 
			all the matches has to hand over their twenty bucks to
			the other one, right?

					ALAN
   			You got it little bro.
				        (usual static)
I CAN'T BELIEVE MY LUCK. NOW I CAN BUY THAT NEW PAIR OF SUNNIES I'VE BEEN HANGING OUT FOR.

After shuffling the cards, Alan splonks the deck on the table and Johnny cuts the deck in half. Then Alan picks up the deck and deals out five cards each. Johnny picks up each card as it lands before him and looks at it. A KING, a SEVEN, a FOUR, a KING and a TWO. Alan puts the deck on the table and picks up all his cards together.

					ALAN
TWO JACKS. A FOUR. A QUEEN. AND AN EIGHT. HMMM. NOT TOO SHABBY.

Johnny discards all but the two kings. Alan keeps his pair of jacks.

					ALAN
			How many you want?

					JOHNNY   					   				 Three. 

Alan deals Johnny three cards, then deals three to himself.

					ALAN
			Same here	
				(picks up a SIX, a TWO and another
				 JACK)
				         (usual static)			 
THREE JACKS. LOOKING GOOD, AL

Johnny doesn't look at his own cards yet, too busy reading his brothers thoughts. Then he picks them up one at a time. The last card appears as a big shiny, brand new KING. He maintains a straight face, frowning as if he isn't sure how good his hand is. Alan grabs five of his own match sticks and slide them into the centre of the desk.

					ALAN 
			  I bet five bucks.

Again Johnny plays dumb. Then he slides ten matches into the centre of the pile.

					JOHNNY
			What the heck. You only live once. Your five and 
			 I raise you five.

Alan looks confident, but his thoughts betray him.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
WHAT? HE'S NEVER RAISED ME IN HIS LIFE. IS HE BLUFFING? LET'S SEE NOW. I GOT THREE JACKS. THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD HAND IN ANYONE'S LANGUAGE. BUT WHAT'S HE GOT. LET'S LOOK INTO HIS EYES AND SEE IF HE'S NERVOUS.YEAH, HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S DOING. STUFF IT. I'LL BLUFF HIM BACK.
 			Okay. I call your five and raise you another five.

Johnny pauses, shuffling his cards from one hand to the other, as if he is about to fold. He shrugs, sliding his last ten sticks into the centre.

					JOHNNY
			 I call your five and raise you another five.

					ALAN
				       (usual static)
WHAT THE! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? WE USED A FULL DECK. IF IT WAS SEVEN'S UP, I'D BE A BIT WORRIED, BUT NO WAY COULD HE BEAT THREE JACKS. HE'S BLUFFING. YEAH, LOOK HOW HIS SHIFTY EYES KEEP DARTING AROUND, WAITING FOR ME TO FOLD. WELL, NO WAY JOSE. IF I FOLD AND HE'S BLUFFING I'LL FEEL LIKE THE BIGGEST FOOL IN THE WORLD.

 					ALAN
				(sliding his remaining sticks in)
		       	  I'll look at you. Winner takes all.

					JOHNNY
				(laying down his cards)
		       	 Three kings. What have you got?

					ALAN
			(mouth drooping, drops his three jacks to the table)
   		       	You've got to be kidding me. How did you know
		        	I didn't have three aces, or a straight, or a 
		       	stinkin' flush?

					JOHNNY
   		     	 Don't know. Just felt really lucky today.

Alan leans back in his chair, scratching his head.

					JOHNNY
				(dragging matches from centre)
			Where's my twenty?

					ALAN
			I tell you what, why don't we play another hand, 
			double or nothing?

					JOHNNY
   			Hand over your twenty first.

Alan reaches into his pocket and hands it over, his face tortured with the agony of defeat. Then he puts all the cards back into a nice neat pile and again shuffles.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
THIS TIME I WON'T LET HIM CUT. I'LL PUT A CRAP CARD ON THE TOP FOR HIM TO GET AND A GOOD CARD ON THE BOTTOM OF THE DECK FOR ME.
			Alright, if I lose again, I'll pay you next week,
			okay?
   
					JOHNNY
			Yeah, alright. But it's my turn to deal.

Alan stops mid shuffle. He looks dazed. Then he reluctantly hands over the deck of cards.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
STUFF IT. I'LL BEAT HIM ANYWAY.

Johnny wins the next two games, folds early on a losing hand, then wins another two.
Alan owes him eighty dollars. Then, out of pure frustration Alan stands from the table, his mind racing.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE. I'VE BEEN CURSED BY THE DEVIL. I'M GONNA BE PAYING THIS LITTLE MONGREL OFF FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.

					JOHNNY
    			I'll make you a deal, AL. I'll let you off what you owe
 			me and even give you back your twenty bucks, but 
			there's one thing you have to promise me.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
WHO DO YOU WANT ME TO KILL.
			What?

					JOHNNY   
			Today, when my friends arrive and while we're out
 			the back, you've got to promise to be the perfect brother
 			You can't pick on me or Cliff or any of my mates and 
			you're not allowed to pull any of your pranks. Is it a deal?

					ALAN
			Yeah, okay, sure. You got a deal.

EXT.  BACKYARD  -  MIDDAY.

Johnny and his friends are all splashing around in the pool. The in-ground pool, twenty metres long by fifteen metres wide is half a metre deep at the shallow end and over two meters deep at the deep end. The B.B.Q. has chops and sausages and steak sizzling away, being maintained by Johnny's father and mother, having a cold beer and enjoying the day. Alan is in charge of the music, and spends just as much time diving from the diving board and swimming as the others. Johnny keeps waiting for Kelly to arrive, but she never does. Nine of his friends arrive by one o'clock, and finally Johnny accepts that Kelly isn't going to show. He eases his disappointment by using his zappy power more than ever. He learns a lot about his friends, like PETE, who had gone to work with his dad earlier this morning, his dad a delivery driver, and when Pete heard his dad ask a lady at a take away food shop for a Herring salad, Pete approached the counter and said, "Yes. I'll have a hairy salad too." Obviously trying to emulate his dad. But the entire shop, employees and customers broke up with laughter, realising Pete's mistake. And Pete isn't about to tell anyone about this error. He is going to take it to his grave. He doesn't want anyone to think that his English is as bad as Clifford's. Johnny also discovers that MIKE is thinking about urinating in the pool, while treading water in the deep end. But Johnny puts this to a stop by telling everyone a blatant, yet plausible lie.

					JOHNNY
 			If anyone pees in the pool, a big green ring of green
			dye will show who did it. It's a chemical reaction with
 			the stuff my dad puts in the water.

MIKE looks around sheepishly, then drags himself out and off to the toilet.
MELANIE, Johnny discovers, has a boil on her arse the size of a golf ball. That's why she is wearing a lose fitting pair of  board shorts. STEVIE, who can't swim a stroke, jumps in closer to the shallow end than the deep, splashing around like he knows what he is doing when in fact he has no idea at all. Little BOBBY, the smallest boy in class, holds no qualms about his tiny stature. He has a happy go lucky nature and everything is a joke to him. Even when he slips on the diving board and cracks his bum bone on the end of the board, which looks like it really hurt, Bobby simply swims to the edge of the pool and climbs out, hobbling around holding his backside while laughing like an idiot. Even though, Johnny knows from Bobby's thoughts that it hurts like hell. Then there is PHIL. Phil is an entity all his own. He has always had a high I.Q., and when Johnny reads his mind he realises there is no mistake. Johnny can barely believe the things he is thinking, like the exact equation for six figure square roots. Or the spelling of words to himself, like haemophiliac. He also has an incredible ability to dredge up ideas which Johnny finds amazing, like inventing a Frisbee with a wind up timer which deploys a parachute if it goes too far. And a T.V. Remote programmable to switch channels when advertisements come on, by audio activation. And a cat or dog collar that sends out a high pitched screech if the animal wanders too far from home, forcing them back to stop the annoying ringing in their ears. And the knife with a hollow handle for band aids, just in case you cut yourself. And the chef calculator in a mobile phone. Just type in the ingredients you have and it tells the cook the quantities and names of the dishes one could make. And the head high power points for homes to stop youngsters from sticking objects in them and being electrocuted. And the fold up shopping trolley, which could be taken from the boot of a car, unfolded and used for shopping, then returning to the car and after putting in the groceries, refolding the trolley and returning it to the boot. And the newspapers made from polymer plastic, which would be reused again and again, the ink being erased by chemicals at the printing press day after day, making redundant the need for paper. And the Aussie rabbits he'd send to countries covered with land mines, a little cruel maybe, but better a dead rabbit than a kid losing a leg. And the foot operated computer mouse, using the big toe to click the buttons so the user could use the keyboard without interruption. And the rock fishing safety, utility belt, which holds all the users tackle and stuff but upon falling into the water, the belt would inflate like a life preserver. The guy is amazing, yet no shrinking violet, he lets everyone willing to listen know that he is a genius, and now Johnny realises there truly is no doubt. This guy was going places, even if his arrogance was a bit tough to handle at times. One of Johnny's other friends, a rather solidly built girl with red hair and serious acne, by the name of MAGGIE, has a great personality and an easy going nature, and the one thing she is proud of more than anything is the fact that she can create the hugest splash bomb from the diving board, splashing the entire surrounds with water, almost to the B.B.Q., with Alan screwing up his face, thinking,

					ALAN
				         (usual static)
WHY DID JOHNNY HAVE TO INVITE HER? SHE'S GONNA GET MY SAUSAGE SANDWICHES ALL WET.  THAT'LL REALLY PUT ME OFF. I CAN'T EAT SOGGY SANGERS.

Later that day, Johnny's father appears with two boxes half filled with what looks like water balloons, about the size of tennis balls. He plants a box on either narrow side of the pool and tells the youngsters to pick a number from one to ten, which then dictates who's side is on who's, so their is no bias. They make two sides of five. His dad then explains that each balloon is filled with vegetable dye, one team having balloons filled with green, the other red. The object of the game is to stain the opposition with a decent sized splash of colouring to eliminate them from the game, a bit like "paint balling" but without the guns. Johnny's team consists of Bobby, Stevie, Debbie and Melanie. While Clifford, Sally, Maggie, Phil and Alan are on the other side, all eager to win the grand prize, a small bag of something. Each team assembles.

					FATHER
			 Okay, guys. Whoever wins. Get's this. 
				(holds up white paper bag)
			 The grand prize. Winner takes all!
				        (usual static)
 A BAG OF LICORICE ALL SORTS.

Johnny reads his dad's thoughts of what's in the bag and screws up his face.

					JOHNNY
				        (mutters to self)
			What a jip.

 His father hands around a set of safety glasses for each to wear.

					FATHER
   			 Alright. Everyone grab one ball at a time and when
			 I give the signal, you can start throwing. Remember,
 			 once you've been hit you've got to jump into the pool.
			 I'll be the judge if it's a direct hit or not. Okay,
			 on your marks, get set, go!

Johnny reads Alan's mind, who has Johnny right in his sights. Trouble is, Johnny knows exactly where Alan is going to target, slightly to the left and about shoulder high. The moment Alan lets fly, Johnny simply weaves the other way, while other balloons are being splashed all over the place. The first one hit is Maggie. She gets one straight in the guts, stumbling into the pool like a runaway seal. Then, just as Johnny is about to take aim at his brother, reading his mind as to which way he is about to dodge, it suddenly dawns on him that this is the perfect opportunity to make Sally hate him a little. A chance to try and put Clifford in the good books with her.

ON:

Johnny as we see what he's basically thinking, redirecting his aim from his brother to Sally.
His P.O.V. as he isolates Sally as his target, a little like the TERMINATOR locking onto it's target. 
	
Then, with an almighty toss, he lets fly and splatters Sally square in the face, her head flying back like she's been shot. It really stings too, Johnny can tell. He can also tell that she is very angry with him. He has made his attack so blatantly obvious that she stares at him with daggers, until finally she wobbles a bit then falls into the pool. Then there are people running up and down their side of the pool grabbing their weapons and dodging as they go, trying to be the last one standing, everyone getting hit but Clifford and Johnny. They each stand there, balloons in hand, cocked and ready to fire when Clifford suddenly thinks,

					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
I'LL AIM IT LEFT AND LOW. HE WON'T BE EXPECTING THAT. HANG ON A SEC, HE KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT I'M GONNA DO. STUFF IT. I'LL CONFUSE MYSELF SO HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT I'M THINKIN', THEN I'LL JUST THROW IT LIKE A MAIDIAC.

Clifford starts running around in circles, like Curly from the three stooges, making a similar kind of sound to disrupt his own thoughts.

					CLIFFORD
			 Wooob, wooob, wooob, wooob, wooob, wooob,
			 wooob, woob, wooob, wooob, wooob, wooob.
			 Wooob, wooob, wooob, wooob, wooob...

He and Johnny know what is going on, but mum, dad and all the other kids look on like he's lost his mind. Johnny just stands there to let his mate win. Johnny throws his balloon with a pitiful shot which misses Clifford by a mile. Then Clifford releases his own balloon like he's throwing a discus. It strikes Johnny in the chest with a big splat, giving his best friend hero status in front of Sally to help him get into her good books. And it actually seems to work, because Sally thinks,

					SALLY
				        (usual static)
GOOD ONE CLIFF. THAT'LL FIX HIM.

FADE OUT:

on Johnny jumping into pool and Clifford leaping for joy.

					CLIFFORD
			 I won! I won! You little stinker! What's in the
			 bag, Mr. Longbow?

INT.  BEDROOM  -  NIGHT

Everyone has gone home, except, Clifford, who is staying over on a spare mattress in Johnny's room. While laying in their beds, Clifford leans up on his elbow and faces his friend,

					CLIFFORD
 			Thanks for that today, mate. I know you let me win.

					JOHNNY
		   	Don't mention it. We're best mates. We gotta look out 
			for each other.

					CLIFFORD
   			I tell you what. That was a hell of a shot you got Sally with.
 			You nearly knocked her head off. I thought she was gonna 
			start bawling.

					JOHNNY
 			She liked you for getting me back, that's for sure. But now
			it's time to start on your next manoeuvre. You've got to
 			make up that bug collection, just so you can invite her over,
 			you know, get to know each other away from school.

					CLIFFORD
   			Yeah, I've already started on it. I' got all kinds of things.
 				(reaches into back pack and drags out a jar)
			 Look!

Johnny's eyes widen. In the jar are several earwigs, flies, a big mosquito and a bunch of maggots, all alive.

					CLIFFORD
			 What do you reckon? This should get Sally's attention.

					JOHNNY
			 Well, you've got that right. But I don't think it's the kind
			 of thing she has in mind.

					CLIFFORD
			 Gotta start somewhere.

					JOHNNY
			 I don't think I have to read your mind to know where
 			 you got those maggots from.

					CLIFFORD
			 Yeah, Uncle Toby. He told me they turn into flies.
			 Did you know that?

					JOHNNY
 			Yeah, I had a bit of an idea.
					   (beat)
			Cliff. I think you might be going about this the wrong way.
			If Sally sees you with that jar of...stuff. She won't
			think it's cool, it'll just make her sick to the stomach.
			It's making me a bit crook just looking at it, you know 						what I mean? What you should do, is ditch the bug
			collection idea and just get some books on insects
			out of the library. You know, learn a bit about the things.
			Then, after you impress Sally with your knowledge, you
			can tell her you want to start your own collection and it'll
			give you an excuse to ask her to help you. Simple.

					CLIFFORD
			 Yeah, that's not bad, Johnno. I like it.

					JOHNNY
			 A lot easier than playing round with those...things. 

					CLIFFORD
   			Yeah, suppose so. (beat) Johnno, can I ask you something?

					JOHNNY
   			Yeah, what is it?

					CLIFFORD
   			Would you take me to where the eel got you. I want to
 			see if I can get zappy powers too.

					JOHNNY
					  (2 beat)
   			Really? Don't forget it hurts a bit. And just 'cause it
 			worked on me doesn't mean it'll work on you.

					CLIFFORD
  			I don't care. I'm willing to take the chance. Imagine
 			how cool it'd be if we both could do it?

					JOHNNY
			Yeah, we'd never have to talk again, if you know what
 			I mean. Okay, alright. If you really want to, I'll take you
 			there tomorrow and we'll give it a go.

Clifford lays back on his pillow, putting his arms behind his head.

					CLIFFORD
					    (tiredly)
			 Yeah. That'll be great Johnno.

Clifford's eyes slowly close and in a matter of seconds he nods off to sleep, as if put under by a hypnotist. Johnny is about to lean over and turn out the bedside lamp when he glances at Clifford and reads his mind...his dream...his nightmare...

This scene shows the nightmare as Clifford sees it.

FADE IN:
					(usual static)
on two monsters with four heads and ten toes on each foot, seven green fingers and lizard like tails. Clifford's at an old cemetery at night, an old run down joint with crooked tombstones and knee high weeds. Clifford is walking through the grave yard, looking over his shoulder. Then they pounce from the shadows. Just then he falls over and sees his own name on a tomb stone. He gets up and starts running as fast as he can, yelling at the top of his nightmare lungs,

					CLIFFORD
					(usual static)
KREMLINS! HELP, THERE'S KREMLINS EVERY WHERE.

RETURN TO SCENE:

 Suddenly he wakes up, staring straight at Johnny. He gulps.

					CLIFFORD(cont)
			Bloody hell. Did you see that?

					JOHNNY
   			Yeah. That was one scary nightmare. How
			often does that happen?

					CLIFFORD
 			It's the first one I've had in ages. Did you see 
			the kremlins?

					JOHNNY
			 They're not called kremlins, Cliff. The kremlin's
			 that place in Russia. They're called gremlins.

					CLIFFORD
			 I don't care what they're called, I don't like 'em.

					JOHNNY
			 Do you want me to leave the light on?

					CLIFFORD
			 Nah, I'll be right. No worries.

Johnny turns out the light and they flop back on their beds.

DISSOLVE ON:

Johnny and Clifford falling asleep, Clifford holding his blankets up near his chin as his eyes dart around looking for kremlins. Then he sighs and goes to sleep like someone hits a switch.

EXT.  BEACH  -  MORNING.

Clifford and Johnny are at the beach, walking out to where Johnny had been zapped, but they can't find an eel. About a minute after searching, Clifford suddenly gets bitten by a LARGE CRAB. The moment it grabs his foot, Clifford and Johnny go running from the water as if chased by a shark, the crab still attached to Clifford's big toe when they arrive on the beach. He finally flicks it off onto the sand, and sits down to look at the minor damage to his foot, moaning with shock and pain.

					CLIFFORD
			 Holy Jebus. Stinkin' thing nearly took
			 my foot off.

					JOHNNY
			Hey, maybe you'll get crabby powers!

					CLIFFORD
		 	What good'll that be to me? Walking sideways
			 isn't a talent! I'll just look stupid!

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah, I suppose you're right. Anyway, let's get
			 home, I'm starving. 

					CLIFFORD
			 Hang on a tick.

Clifford wraps the LARGE CRAB in his top before it escapes back to the water, and holds it out in front of him as he walks off with a slight limp.

					CLIFFORD (cont)
			 Guess what. I'm gonna put this in Barry's locker
			 tomorrow. Let's see the look on his face when
			 he gets bit. Get his combo tomorrow, will ya?

FADE OUT:

on Johnny and Clifford walking off toward home.

FADE IN:

on school grounds the next day.

EXT.  SCHOOL  -  MORNING.

The first person Johnny sees at school is Kelly, standing in the quadrangle with a couple of her friends. Clifford is elsewhere. She smiles a beautiful smile at Johnny as he walks past and it catches his attention. He smiles back.

					JOHNNY
			 Hi, Kelly. What happened to you on Saturday?

					KELLY
 			Sorry, Johnny. I was going to come, honestly. But I
 			ended up going to the movies with Barry.

Johnny's eyes go wide with horror.

   					KELLY(cont)
			 Are you okay, Johnny?

No reply. He just stands there, mouth open, while blinking like a mad man about to either go on an insane frenzy or collapse in a screaming heap.

					KELLY
			Johnny?

   					JOHNNY
 			Hey? What was that? Oh, sorry, Kelly. I didn't get
 			much sleep last night. I'm just a bit fuzzy, that's all.

   					KELLY
 			I understand. How's your dad?

					JOHNNY
					(frowning)
			What do you mean?

					KELLY   
			I heard your dad worked as a cleaner at the airport
 			and got the sack.

					JOHNNY  
			What? Who told you that?

					KELLY
			 Barry...at the movies.

Johnny's face is a picture of shock and despair. He can't find any words as Kelly puts her hand to his shoulder, in a friendly fashion, as if for support. And it is right then when he sees a glistening jewel on Kelly's wrist. He has to twist his head to get a closer look, and sure enough, there on Kelly's wrist, the band obviously adjusted, is JOHNNY'S MUM'S GOLD WATCH.
   
					JOHNNY
			Where'd you get that?

					KELLY 
			Barry gave it to me. Beautiful, isn't it?

 The bell sounds and Kelly gives Johnny a parting smile.

					KELLY(cont)
			 Got to go. See you later, Johnny.

He fails to respond. He just stands there staring blankly as Kelly and her friends make for Social Studies.

Johnny takes a seat out in the quadrangle, trying to get his mind around what had just transpired, when all of a sudden Clifford comes hurrying over.

					CLIFFORD
			 Hey, Johnno. What are you doin'?

					JOHNNY
   			You're not going to believe what just happened. Barry
			gave the watch to Kelly! Not only that. He told her my
 			dad worked at the airport as a cleaner.

					CLIFFORD
			 I thought your dad was an airline pilot?

					JOHNNY
 			He is you idiot. Remember he took you and me for
			a flight to Canberra a few months back?

					CLIFFORD
   			Oh yeah, I forgot. He gets those free flights for family
 			and friends, doesn't he? That was great getting a look
 			at the flying deck, wasn't it?

   					JOHNNY
			What am I going to do, Cliff?

					CLIFFORD
   			I don't know. Looks like Barry has got you real good 
			this time. Hey, Mr Laidley is up at the gym with the
 			students who want to join the school cricket team. 
			Barry's there. Wanna go?

					JOHNNY
			Yeah, alright.

					CLIFFORD
	 		I'll be right with ya. I gotta go to my locker and get the
			crab. I'm gonna put it in Barry's gym locker.
  
   					JOHNNY
		   	Okay, hurry up.

EXT.  SCHOOL OVAL  -  MORNING.
   
They arrive outside the gym to see Mr Laidley and a whole bunch of students, including Barry and Stewart, out on the oval. The teacher is pointing at students as he makes up two cricket teams.

INT. GYM CHANGING ROOMS  -  MORNING.

Johnny and Clifford enter the gym and change for cricket practise. While in the changing room, Clifford sees that Barry has simply bunched his school clothes on the long wooden bench beneath his locker, rather than stowing them. Barry's locker is securely locked, so Clifford slips the crab amongst Barry's clothes, then he and Johnny head out to the oval.

EXT.  SCHOOL OVAL  -  MORNING.

Mr Laidley has just selected the two teams when he decides to put the two late comers,  Johnny and Clifford, in the side opposing Barry. Barry is bowling and after the current batsman is clean bowled by Barry, Johnny grabs a cricket bat and heads out to the centre pitch, grinding his teeth with rage. Then, as Barry bowls his speedy deliveries, Johnny reads his thoughts and knows what type of ball Barry is going to bowl to him and Johnny smashes the ball all around the oval. Barry is fuming, but there is nothing he can do to stop the onslaught, except become utterly exhausted.

DISSOLVE:

 in and out of the game until the teacher finally brings an end to it.

					MR LAIDLEY
			 Okay, boys. That's enough for today. Let's 
			 head in so I can work out the team.

INT.  GYM CHANGING ROOM  -  MORNING.

They enter the changing room. The students sit on the wooden bench and start getting changed. Mr Laidley sits at the end of the bench and starts writing the team down on a clipboard, when all of a sudden, the teacher leaps up with a start, the crab affixed firmly to his backside. He is trying to look over his shoulder to see what the problem is, when Barry grabs a cricket bat and gets a run up from about five metres away and smashes the crab, and the teacher's backside, with an almighty thwack, the teacher limping around in agony.

					BARRY
 			Sorry, Mr Laidley. But there was a crab biting
			you. I got him good, didn't I?

					MR LAIDLEY
			You moron! Who put it there?

					BARRY
			 I don't know, sir. It wasn't me.

					MR LAIDLEY
				          (anguished face)
 			You can all go back to class now. I'll work out the
			 team later. And when I find out who put that crab
			 there, they'll wish they were never born.

FADE OUT:

on Johnny and Clifford giving each other silent looks.

INT.  LOUNGE ROOM  -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny walks into his house and splonks on the couch, next to his dad, who notices Johnny's sadness.

					FATHER
			 You okay, Johnno? What's the problem?

					JOHNNY
			 Nothin', dad. Just had a bad day at school.

					FATHER
				(putting arm around him)
			You want to talk about it?

					JOHNNY
					   (sighs)
			 A kid at school today told everyone you're a
			 cleaner.

					FATHER
			 Why would he do that?

					JOHNNY
		 	Because Barry's a dirty rotten mongrel. He wants
			me to look like a loser.

					FATHER
			Would it upset you that much if I was a cleaner?

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know. I suppose not.

					FATHER
			 Let me tell you something. When I left school and
			 had to pay for flying lessons and aviation college,
			 I did actually work part time as a cleaner to pay for
			 it all. I met your mum at one of those places I used
			 to clean. So, when you think about it, I was very
			 lucky to get a job as a cleaner, wasn't I? 			 		 		 Otherwise I wouldn't have had the great family I've
			 got today. You know what I mean?

					JOHNNY
					   (nods)
			 Hmmm...Dad. Did you ever reads comics
			 as a kid? You know, like Spiderman, that kind of
			 thing?

					FATHER
			 Yes, of course. Spiderman and the hulk were my
			 favourites. Why? You read comics, don't you?

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah, sometimes. If you could have one super
			 heroes' power, which would it be?

					FATHER
			 Oh, I don't know. Probably Superman's. He can
			 fly without an aeroplane.

					JOHNNY
			 If you did have a super power, would you tell people?

					FATHER
			 Hmmm, probably not. It wouldn't be as effective if
			 everyone knew about it. Let's face it, that's why all
			 the super heroes keep their identity secret, isn't it?

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah, I see what you mean. Anyway, I'd better go
			 up and do my homework. Thanks, dad.

					DAD
			 Okay, son. Oh. And don't forget. Your mum and I
			 have an anniversary on Thursday. I'm taking her out
			 to a nice restaurant. I've already had a word to Alan
			 about behaving. So, while we're out, I don't want you
			 guys having any wild parties or anything, okay?

					JOHNNY
			 Yes, dad.

INT. BEDROOM  - AFTERNOON.

Johnny flops down on his bed, laying on his back, looking blankly at the ceiling. He takes out his micro-recorder and puts it to his mouth.

					JOHNNY
				        (into recorder)
			 Well...things have definitely gone from bad to
			 worse. Now Kelly's got the watch and I have no
			 idea of how to get it back...I...am...stuffed.

Johnny suddenly sits bolt upright, lowering the recorder to his lap. He stares fearfully into the mirror. 

					JOHNNY
				      (to self in mirror) 
			 Anniversary! Thursday! Mum always wears her
			 watch on anniversaries.

Johnny flops back down on the bed again. He ever so slowly puts the recorder to his mouth, and speaks into it with composed defeat.

					JOHNNY
				         (into recorder)
			 Correction. I'm not stuffed at all. I am utterly and
			 totally fu...

										CUT TO:

Alan suddenly opens Johnny's bedroom door and interrupts Johnny from finishing the "fucked" word.

					ALAN
			 Hey! Cricket season's about to start. You wanna
			 go out and have a hit?

					JOHNNY
			            (still laying back on bed)
			 Nah. Not right now. I've got too much homework
			 to do.

					ALAN
			 I heard you hit some sixes today. I think I might
			 try out for the team this summer too. I'm a ten
			 times better player than you. When's the next
			 training session?

					JOHNNY
					 (shrugs)
			 I'm not sure. Mr Laidley never actually said.

					ALAN
			 I also heard that Mr Laidley's got crabs.
			 Is it true?

					JOHNNY
					(frowns)
			 What?

					ALAN
			 You comin' out, or not?

Johnny just shakes his head.

					ALAN (cont)
			 Alright. Stuff ya then.

Alan leaves, closing the door.

FADE OUT:

on Johnny on his bed, staring into the heavens, as if for an answer from above.

INT.  BEDROOM  -  NIGHT.

Johnny is in bed, tossing and turning.

FADE TO:

DREAM SEQUENCE: 

Johnny is playing cricket, facing SHANE WARNE, or any Aussie bowler. Warne bowls to him and Johnny hits him for six after six, then, with the second last ball of his over, Johnny strikes the ball and hits Warne in the right shoulder with an almighty whack. Warne wobbles a bit.

					WARNE
				    (to Johnny, in dream)
			 You're going to have to do a lot better than that to
			 knock me out of the game, sunny Jim. 

										CUT TO:

A young family, (mum, dad and two kids about seven years old), sitting on the grass having a picnic in the outer at the same cricket ground, not paying too much attention to what's going on out in the middle of the pitch as they enjoy their chicken sandwiches.

					FIRST KID
				      (to dad, in dream)
			 Do you think Warnie will give us the match ball
			 after the game?

					DREAM DAD 
				       (to kid, in dream)
			 Maybe. If you ask him nicely

										CUT TO:

Warne bowling the next ball, but as he bowls, his arm comes off - ball still in hand. SLOW MO as ball and arm head toward Johnny with SPECIAL/FX, who smashes arm and ball over the fence for six.

										CUT TO:

Warne's arm, still clutching the ball as it splonks in the middle of the family picnic, a look of horror and dismay on the kids faces as the dismembered arm appears to be presenting the kid the ball.

					DREAM DAD
			             (nonchalantly, to kid in dream)
			 There you go. You didn't even have to ask
			 for it.

										CUT TO:
	
paper boy selling newspapers on street corner, extolling headlines of the next day.

					PAPER BOY
					  (in dream)
			Extra, extra. Read all about it.  Johnny Longbow
			destroys Australia's chances of winning the ashes
			series by injuring great Australian bowler!!!

RETURN TO SCENE:

Johnny shoots up in bed, eyes wide. Moments later he lays back down.

DISSOLVE ON:

Johnny going back to sleep.

EXT.  STREET  -  MORNING.

Johnny and Clifford are walking to school the next day.

					CLIFFORD
			Have you figured out how to get the watch back yet?

					JOHNNY 
			The only thing I can think of is to take Kelly aside
			and tell her the truth.

					CLIFFORD
			 You're not gonna tell her everything, are you?
			 Like, I mean.You're not gonna tell her about zappy.
			 That'll ruin everything.

					JOHNNY
			 No, I'll leave that part out. I'll just tell her why I took
			 it, how Barry stole it and how she ended up with it.
			 Maybe she'll give it back to me.

					CLIFFORD
			 What if she goes straight up to Barry and asks him
			 about it? He'll deny it and then knock you out for
			 making him look bad in front of her.

					JOHNNY
			 I know. But then when I wake up, I'll just go home
			 and tell mum and dad the whole story. Then Mum
			 can come to school and identify the watch and
			 at least get it back.

					CLIFFORD
			 Gee, this could turn fugly. The teachers could get
			 involved, the cops. Barry could get expelled.
			 Even you could get expelled for causing it all.

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah well, I can always join a freak show, you
			 know, doing magic tricks and stuff. 
				(something dawns on him, 
				and he gets a little heated)
			 Hang on a tick. I'm not the one in the wrong here.
			 Barry is. Alright, I might have stuffed up by borrowing
			 it in the first place, but he's the one who actually stole
			 it. Barry caused all this, not me.

					CLIFFORD 
					(supportively)
			 Yeah. You're right, you know.

					JOHNNY
		    		          (calming down)
			You bet I'm right.

					CLIFFORD
			 I hate to say this to you, Johnno. But after you
			 tell Kelly, I reckon you've lost your chance
			 with her.

					JOHNNY
				(on the brink of falling apart)
			 If I just had some more time. Maybe I could figure
			 something out.

					CLIFFORD  
			 Why don't you just wait till Friday. The school has
			 swimming trials down at the local pool. Kelly always
			 goes. We can sneak into the changing rooms and get
			 the watch that way. No way would she wear it in the
			 pool.

					JOHNNY
			 Friday's too late. My parents have an anniversary on
			 Thursday night. Mum'll want to wear her watch.
			 I want to get this whole mess sorted out before
			 she sees it gone.

					CLIFFORD
			 Why not just pretend all this never happened. When
			 your mum sees it gone, just play dumb.

					JOHNNY
			 Actually, that did cross my mind. It's just that, dad bought
			 mum that watch when they first met and she kind of thinks
			 of it as her lucky charm. I just wouldn't feel right about it.
			 You know what I mean? Besides, my dad can read me like
			 a book. I don't know how he does it, but he can tell when me
			 and Alan are lying from a mile away 

					CLIFFORD
			 Hmmm. I know what you mean. My mum knows when
			 I'm lying even before I open my big mouth.

					JOHNNY
					   (sighs)
			 What would you do if you were in my
			 position?

					CLIFFORD
					    (beat)
			I'd put a skunk in Barry's locker.

					JOHNNY
			 Geez. You're determined to put something nasty
			 in his locker, aren't you? Anyway. That wouldn't
			 solve my problem. 
					   (beat)
			 Where would you get a skunk from? They don't live
			 in Australia.

					CLIFFORD
			 I've seen them at the zoo. We could nick one from
			 there.

					JOHNNY
				 (shakes head vehemently)
			 Forget it. We're not stealing a skunk from the zoo,
			 alright?

					CLIFFORD
					 (curiously)
			 Be great if all the animals in the zoo were set free
			 to run around in the bush, wouldn't it?

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know about that. Be a bit dangerous
			 having lions and tigers running around everywhere.

					CLIFFORD
			 Yeah, but if skunks were runnin' around, we could
			 catch one and stick it in Barry's locker.

INT.  CLASSROOM  -  MORNING.

The bell sounds and everyone is heading into class. Johnny and Clifford take their seats. MR SMITH, the science teacher, stands up behind his desk with an announcement.

					MR SMITH
			 Okay class. Settle down. Settle down everyone.
			 As you know, we're going to have vocation day soon,
			 which I hope you're all looking forward to. Anyway,
			 as a special treat today, we are fortunate enough to have
			 someone to talk to us about a vocation which some of
			 you may find very interesting. May I Introduce, Mr
			 Donald Longbow, A senior airline captain and
 			 father of one of our students, Johnny.

Father walks in, dressed in full uniform and takes place at head of class. Everyone turns around and stares with shock at Johnny, who is totally gob smacked. Then they turn attention back to front of class.

					FATHER
 			 Good morning class. Nice to see you all. I'd like to have
			 been here in a few weeks with a lot of the other mums
			 and dads when we give you some insight into our jobs,
			 but my schedule is very hectic this time of year, so Mr
			 Smith was kind enough to allow me to visit you today
			 instead. Firstly 
				( takes off cap and places it on table)
			 Let's get something straight...

										CUT TO:
 
Johnny's eyes widen, thinking his dad is about to humiliate him by mentioning Barry and or the discussion he and his dad had had about being a cleaner yesterday. But this never eventuates.

					FATHER(cont)
			 Being an airline pilot is a great job, that's for sure.
			 But it's the kind of career a person should only pursue
			 if they are really and truly passionate, and fascinated
			 with flying aircraft. The studies are intense. The training
			 is even more intense and the dedication required can really
			 push people to their limits. There is no doubt that it is very
			 rewarding, and I don't mean this necessarily in a monetarily
			 way. It's true, the pay is good, but there are also many other
			 benefits to look forward to. Obviously, you get to travel,
			 you get to meet a lot of great people, and most importantly
			 you get to work with other, very dedicated and self motivated
			 individuals, in all variations of the aviation industry.
			 This includes, other pilots, cabin crew, air traffic controllers,
			 meteorologist, mechanics, engineers, a whole array of people
			 who keep aircraft in the air, taking people safely from one
			 place to another. Now. I could bore you with all kinds of
			 technical mumbo jumbo
				 (with a comical roll of the eyes)
			 pardon the jumbo pun.
				 (Some of the kids laugh)
			 But that's not why I'm here. Quite simply. I'd like you all
			 to just sit back, relax, and ask me anything you like about
			 being, or becoming a pilot.

A bunch of hands go up. In the background we hear questions, such as, "Have you ever had an emergency?" "How fast does a jet fly?" "What type of planes do you fly?" "Where'd you learn to fly?"

Johnny gazes over at Kelly, reading her thoughts.

					KELLY
					(fuming)
				         (usual static)
I CAN'T BELIEVE BARRY LIED TO ME. I HATE LIARS. HOW COULD HE? HE'D BETTER HAVE A GOOD EXPLANATION FOR THIS.

ON:

Barry, sitting there looking very sheepish.

The Q&A goes on for another few minutes, then the father concludes.

					FATHER
			 Anyway, it's been a pleasure seeing you all today.
			 I hope I've given you some idea of what it's like to
			 be involved with the world of aviation, and maybe
			 some day I'll see some of you again on a flight deck.
				      (to Mr Smith)
			 Thank you, Mr Smith. I'll hand the class back to you
			 now. Good luck everyone, whatever career path you 			 			 may choose.

					MR SMITH
			 Let's all give a round of applause to Captain Longbow
			 to show our appreciation.

After the applause dies down, Johnny's dad gives Johnny a wink and leaves. The teacher turns to the black board.

					MR SMITH (cont)
			 Okay. Let's get to work, shall we?

FADE OUT:

on Johnny's surprise..

FADE IN:

as the bell sounds to end class. Barry exits hastily, while other kids are milling around.

					KELLY
				 (approaching Johnny)
			 I'm so sorry about what I said to you yesterday.
			 You must have thought I was a total jerk. Have
			 you seen where Barry went? I want to have a
			 word with him.

					JOHNNY
			 No, I don't know where he is. And don't worry
			 about yesterday. You know how much trash
			 Barry talks. Hey. You wouldn't want to go for a
			 walk along the beach after school, would you?

					KELLY
				 (considers, then smiles)
			 Yeah, okay. I'll meet you down by the pier about
			 six, okay?

					JOHNNY
			 Alright. Great. I'll see you there.

Kelly exits, hunting for Barry, who has raced off to the wrecking yard. Clifford approaches Johnny, while other kids are busily telling Johnny what a cool dad he has.

					CLIFFORD
			 That was unbelievable, wasn't it? See the look on
			 Barry's face? He looked more shocked than the
			 old lady who fell out of the coffin box.

					JOHNNY
			 I know. And guess what. I got a date with Kelly.

					CLIFFORD
			You've gotta be kiddin' me. You still gonna tell her
			about the watch?.

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know yet. I'll play it by ear.

					CLIFFORD
			 Where you gonna take her?

					JOHNNY
			 No where. It's not really a date, I suppose.
			 I'm just going to meet her at the beach after
			 school. But it's a start, hey?

					CLIFFORD
			 You bet. Anyway. I gotta get down to the library.
			 Sally spends her morning tea breaks down there
			 studying. It's time for me to put plan 'B' into action.
			 I'll snag you later, Johnno.

INT.  LIBRARY  -  MORNING.

Clifford enters Library, students meandering around and sitting at tables. Sally is sitting alone, reading a huge book on bugs. Clifford goes over to the insect section and grabs a book, then casually walks over to opposite Sally.

					CLIFFORD
			 Oh, Hi, Sally. Is anyone sitting here?

					SALLY
				        (indifferently)
			 Don't know. Don't think so.

					CLIFFORD
			 	(sitting, splonking book on table)
			 Oh, you're reading that one. I read that last week.
			 Thought I'd give this one a bit of a look today.

					SALLY
				 (referring to her book) 
			 Has this one got anything good about the Bird Wing?

					CLIFFORD
		      (dumbfounded, having no idea what she is on about)
			 Ahhh, um, no, no, I can't remember if it says anything 			 			 about, bird's wings. I think it's just about bugs.

					SALLY
			   (weighing response, then frowns)
			 The Bird Wing's a butterfly.

					CLIFFORD
				          (embarrassed)
			 Ohh. I mustn't have got to that part. I sort of only read
			 about the kind of bugs that really interest me.

					SALLY
			 Like what?

					CLIFFORD
			 Ohhh, you know, things like
				(pulls a pained face)
			  maggots.

					SALLY
				     (slightly repulsed)
			 Yeah, well. Listen. I gotta get going. I'll see you
			 later.

Sally stands and packs her stuff and heads off, with Clifford slumping in his seat, shaking his head. 

					CLIFFORD
					  (to self)
			 Why can't she like maths.

INT.  WRECKING YARD OFFICE  -  DAY.

Barry is sitting in his dad's office at the auto wreckers, looking very forlorn. His dad is present but there are no customers around.

					DAD
			 So, what's your problem?

					BARRY
			 I think I stuffed up, dad.

					DAD
			 What are you talking about?

					BARRY
			 You know how you've always taught me that 
			 when in doubt, just bullshit my way through things?

					DAD
			 Yeah. Which I still maintain is great advice. Why?

					BARRY
			 Well. It gets a bit complicated. But basically, there's
			 this girl at school who I really like. And, well...I
			 told her a little bit too much bullshit to get her to like
			 me, and it sort of. Well, it sort of backfired.

					DAD
			 Well, lad. You see, the key to knowing when to bullshit
			 and when not to bullshit takes a great deal of skill.
			 It's one of those split second things, where you either
			 get it right or you get it wrong. You'll learn in time.
			 That's all it takes, a bit of time to learn the science of,
			 what I like to call, 'the bullshit timing factor'. It sort of
			 comes with age and maturity. And of course a lot of practise.
			 Don't worry about it, you'll get the hang of it
			 soon enough. My best advice to you, is to just keep on 			 		 practising. Don't worry, you'll get it right eventually.
			 Then, once you've got it down pat, you watch the girls
			 come rollin' in. Don't worry. One day you'll be just as
			 good as me.

EXT.  BEACH/PIER   -  AFTERNOON.

Johnny and Kelly are wandering side by side down the pier. It is a warmish, quiet afternoon/evening. Several other people are also taking a stroll. A couple of youngsters are fishing. The pier is about forty metres long. The tide is on it's way out.

					KELLY
			 So. Are you going to join the Force at twenty one?
			 I am.

					JOHNNY
			 I don't know. Actually, I'm not sure I'd make a good
			 cop.

					KELLY
			 What? How come?

					JOHNNY
			 It'd be interesting, sure, but...I don't like guns.

					KELLY
			 You don't have to carry a gun to be in the police force.
			 You can join the forensic department, the radio centre.
			 There's tons of different sections. You're good with
			 computers, why don't you go into the techie department?

					JOHNNY
			 Hmmm, yeah, I suppose so.

					KELLY
			 Tell me something. And be honest. Are you really
			 keen on the police force, or did you just say all that
			 because you found out I wanted to join?

					JOHNNY
			 Hey? Ummm.

					KELLY 
			 Let me tell you something, Johnny. I hate liars
			 more than anything. So just tell me the truth. 

They near the end of the pier, when, Johnny stops and faces her. 

					JOHNNY
			 Okay, the truth is, I found out you wanted to join.
			 Do you want to hear something else that's the truth?

Kelly just watches him.

					JOHNNY (cont)
			 You know that watch Barry gave you?

					KELLY
				    (looking at watch)
			 Yeah, what about it?

					JOHNNY
			 Well. It's just that, well, I happen to know he stole it.

					KELLY
			               (face turning furious)
			 I knew it! When I asked him where he'd got it, he told me
			 some rubbish about it being a family heir loom. I couldn't 			 		 understand why he'd give something so important away to 			 		 someone he hardly knows.

Kelly unstraps the watch from her wrist and tosses it out into the water. Johnny's eyes bulge as he watches it splash about twenty metres out into the bay.

					KELLY
			 There! That takes care of that, doesn't it?

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah...that definitely takes care of that.

					KELLY 
				(rubbing her hands clean)
			 Anyway. I'm going to the bowling alley. It's comp night.
			 Hopefully Barry will be there and I can give him a piece
			 of my mind.
				(she turns and starts off. Then
				 stops and turns to him, almost
				 as an after thought)
 			You playing tonight?

					JOHNNY
			 Ohhh, um. Yeah. But there's something important
			 I've got to do first. I'll meet you there later.

Kelly shrugs indifferently, then starts off, while Johnny turns to eyeball where the watch had landed, shaking his head with confusion.

INT.  BEDROOM  -  AFTERNOON/EVENING.

Johnny is rummaging through his wardrobe, finally grabbing his metal detector. He checks that no-one is watching, then makes his way back to the pier/beach.

INT.  BOWLING ALLEY  -  AFTERNOON/ EVENING.

Barry, Stewart, Clifford and Sally are all playing ten pins. Kelly hasn't yet arrived. Clifford has a bowling ball with a smiley face painted in white on his black bowling ball, using the holes as the eyes and nose. Barry is beating everyone easily, laughing at how bad they are all playing. Especially Clifford.

					BARRY
			          (watching Clifford's gutter ball)
			  You idiots are totally useless. I've never seen such a
			  hopeless bunch of losers in all my days.
				           (to Cliff)
			  And as for you, knuckle head. You couldn't get a
			  strike even if you were hit by lightning.

EXT.  BEACH  -  AFTERNOON/EVENING.

There are few people around by the time Johnny arrives back at the shoreline. The sun has almost set as he takes off his shoes and socks. He stuffs his recorder in his socks, then sets his detector to on. He meanders out to where he believes the watch has landed. It takes a few minutes, but before long he finds the watch. He checks the back - C.U.: it reads 'water proof' - Johnny smiles triumphantly, and puts it in his pocket. But on his way back to shore he sees a bicycle inner tube in the shallows. He frowns, then prods it with the foot of the detector. Suddenly, he gets zapped by the same eel and goes flying back about ten metres, landing on his back in the shallow water. He then gets himself up and drags himself ashore and puts on his shoes and socks and cap. It is now he sees that his hands and ankles, and all the exposed parts of his flesh which had come into contact with salt water, gradually start to turn invisible. Eventually, all we see is a set of clothes walking around. The few people around don't notice, but the reality dawns on Johnny. He looks down inside his shirt and realises he is totally invisible.

					JOHNNY
			 What the...where's my...I can't see myself.
			 I'm, invisible.

EXT.  BEACH/PARKLAND  -  AFTERNOON/EVENING.

Johnny walks from the beach to the lightly wooded parkland. On a park bench, about fifteen metres away from where Johnny is walking are two DERRO'S. The SECOND derro is lying on the bench in the fetal position facing away from Johnny, while the FIRST derro is sitting next to him with a bottle of wine/spirits in a brown paper bag. Johnny doesn't notice them. But the FIRST derro is watching very closely as he sees Johnny walking along with no head or arms or legs. Just a set of clothing and a metal detector. The FIRST derro strains his eyes and shakes his head with disbelief.

										CUT TO:

Johnny ducks behind a nearby tree when he sees someone approaching in the distance. Johnny is now hidden from the derro who saw him. Whilst behind the tree, halfway between the beach and the road leading to his house, a fresh water, rotating sprinkler which is watering the parkland squirts him on the hands. A few moments later his hands miraculously start to reappear.

					JOHNNY
			       (to self, noticing the reappearance)
			 What's going on here?

He waits until the sprinkler comes back around, then splashes the exposed parts of his body with FRESH water, until gradually his body reappears. He goes rushing off back to the beach.

										CUT TO:

First derro as he can't believe his eyes, seeing the kid reappear as normal. He shakes his head. He taps the second derro on the leg to get his attention, but his mate is half asleep and fails to respond so the first derro dismisses it. He just has another swig of his bottle.

										CUT TO:

Johnny walks to the edge of the SALT water and splashes it all over his exposed flesh. A few moments later, his body becomes invisible again. He takes his micro-recorder from his pocket and speaks into it as he heads back to the parkland.

					JOHNNY
				         (into recorder)
			 An amazing thing just happened. That eel got me
			 again! I go invisible in salt water, and reappear
			 in fresh water...I don't know if I've still got the
			 first zappy power yet. Have to wait and see.

He puts recorder in pocket and heads back to the sprinkler to splash himself back to visibility.

										CUT TO:

First derro still sitting on bench, his mate still asleep. Again he sees Johnny appear as just a set of clothing and a metal detector. He elbows his mate.

					FIRST DERRO
			 Hey Nev. Neville. Get a load of this.

No reply, just an annoyed shuffle as second derro tries to get cosy.

First derro continues to watch. He elbows his mate harder.

					FIRST DERRO
			 Neville. I'm not jokin'. You've got to see this
			 to believe it.

Second derro finally concedes. He brings himself up, but just as the first derro points to Johnny, Johnny disappears behind the tree again, to soak himself with fresh water.

					SECOND DERRO
			 What? What is it?

					FIRST DERRO
			 There's an invisible kid behind that tree over there.
			 I'm not kiddin' ya.

					SECOND DERRO
					 (looking hard)
			 What are you talkin' about? If he's invisible, how
			 can you see him?

					FIRST DERRO
			 His clothes. He's invisible but I can see his clothes.
			 Look...watch.

					SECOND DERRO
					   (sarcastically)
			 I suppose he's carrying a magic wand too, hey?

					FIRST DERRO
			 Actually, yeah. He is carrying a kinda wand.

Suddenly Johnny appears as a normal kid, carrying a metal detector. Johnny then notices the two derros. He watches them for a few moments to see if they saw anything.

Second derro looks at his mate and simply shakes his head, before going back to his sleeping position, as if it's an everyday occurrence.

The first derro and Johnny's eyes meet. Johnny reads his thoughts.

					FIRST DERRO
					   (usual static)
WELL. THAT JUST ABOUT DOES IT FOR ME. WHAT WAS THE NAME OF THAT DETOX CENTRE AGAIN?

He looks down at the bottle, then leans over and drops it in the nearby rubbish bin. Johnny simply starts off toward home.

					JOHNNY
				         (into recorder)
			  Yep. Can still read minds.

INT.  UPSTAIRS  -  EVENING.

Johnny gives the gold watch a good clean, then puts it back where it belongs. He then sneaks to the upstairs bathroom, pours some salt into the bath and runs the water. He starts to undress and slides into the water. SPECIAL/FX: He vanishes into thin air.

					JOHNNY 
			(to self, as things start moving around)
			Okay. Let's put...zappy two, to the test,
			shall we. 

INT. LOUNGE ROOM   -  EVENING.

Alan is sitting on the couch watching tele. Mum and dad are in the dining room. Alan is lounging about when we show him trying to brush something away from his ear, like an insect is bugging him. It is invisible Johnny playing tricks on him. As the irritation becomes more insistent, Alan starts to move around to see what it is, but of course he can't find anything. Then there is a longish pause and Alan finally dismisses it, until suddenly, invisible Johnny flicks Alan's ear with a quick flick of the finger. Alan Leaps from the couch. Then the t.v. remote becomes airborne and the channels start to change. Alan's eyes go wide.

					ALAN
			 Mum! Dad! We gotta move!
				 (he starts out to the dining room) 
			 This place is haunted. I'm not jokin'!!

					FATHER
					  (O.S.)
			Don't be ridiculous. I told you not to watch that
			exorcist movie!

The front door of the house opens and then closes as invisible Johnny heads off to the bowling alley.

INT.  BOWLING ALLEY  -  EVENING.

Barry is still bragging about how good he is, teasing the others for playing poorly, when all of a sudden it is Clifford's turn. He gets a run up and releases the ball - the smiley face clunking down the alley, almost becoming a gutter ball, when suddenly, (With Johnny's unseen hand) the ball changes trajectory and makes a strike. Then, when Barry has his own shots, no matter how good they are, they becomes gutter balls. Sometimes his ball even bounces into other people's lanes. This goes on for several shots, until the entire alley is transfixed by Clifford's skill and Barry's amazingly bad behaving bowling ball. Then, to win the game, Clifford releases the worst looking shot in history, when the ball bounces out of the gutter, back on course, then gets a strike.
    Barry is shocked, his mouth dangling open, when all of a sudden Clifford's bowling ball appears in the ball return chute, the smiley face looking up at Barry mockingly. Suddenly, the ball becomes airborne and thwacks Barry in the midriff, knocking the wind out of him as he splonks to the floor, hugging the ball like he had just marked a football. Whilst lying there, Kelly appears and stands over him.

					KELLY
			 And listen closely, you. I never want to speak
			 to you ever again! Imagine giving someone you
			 supposedly like stolen property.You're horrible.

										CUT TO:

Clifford swaggering over to where Sally is sitting, putting on her shoes. He believes he is some kind of world bowling champion now and puts a foot up on her seat, looking at her as if she couldn't possibly resist him.

					CLIFFORD
					   (to Sally)
			 What do you reckon? Pretty good come back
			 huh?

					SALLY
					 (shrugs) 
			 Yeah, I suppose so.

										CUT TO:
 
Front door opens as invisible Johnny leaves the alley to head home to soak in fresh water, a bit of rubbish and dust swirling about in the wake of his departure. No one knows about Johnny's new talent yet.

										CUT TO:

					CLIFFORD
			  	(wavering head as though brilliant)
			 You know what, Sally? Some people have actually
			 called me an idiot moron.

					SALLY
			     (screws up face, stands to leave)
			 Yeah, well. I'm not surprised by that at all!

Sally heads off, Kelly storms off. Barry brings himself to his feet and sits down next to Stewart, away from everyone else.

					BARRY
				          (to Stewart)
			 That Johnny Longbow has put my pot on big time.
			 You know what! If Kelly hates me, then I'm gonna
			 make sure she hates him just as much. If I don't get
			 the girl, well neither does he.

					STEWART
			 What are you gonna do?

					BARRY
			 Kelly owns a pedigree pet poodle, right?

					STEWART
			 Yeah. So?

					BARRY
			 Well, she loves that poodle.

					STEWART
			 So?

					BARRY
			 Don't you see? We'll take it, put it in Longbow's
			 back shed to make it look like he's kidnapped it.
			 Then we'll leave her a note telling her where it is,
			 and bingo. He's a goner.

INT.  BATHROOM  -  NIGHT. 

Johnny fading back to visible, soaking in a long, hot soapy bath. 

					MOTHER
					   (O.S.)
				 (outside bathroom door)
			 Johnny! Are you in there?

					JOHNNY
			 Yes, Mum. Just having a bath.

					MOTHER
					  (O.S.)
			 Okay, darling. Tea's ready.

					JOHNNY
			 Thanks mum, I'll be right down.

EXT.  KELLY'S BACKYARD  -  NIGHT.

Barry and Stewart are climbing over Kelly's back fence, the fence backing up to a public playground. They are wearing dark clothing and creep up to the back door. The house is quiet and except for an upstairs room or two, the place is in darkness. In the bottom of the door is a small "doggy door". Barry pushes on it and it swings back and forth.

					BARRY
				          (to Stewart)
			 Go on then.

					STEWART 
			 What?

					BARRY
			 Crawl in and get the dog. It sleeps in a basket at
			 the end of the hallway.

					STEWART
				 (looking doubtfully at door)
			 I won't fit through that.

					BARRY
			 Yes you will 

					STEWART
			 Are you crazy? I'm amazed the poodle can even
			 fit through it.

					BARRY
			 Well, what are we gonna do? We can't stay out
			 here all night.

					STEWART
			 I don't know. This is your master plan. Not mine.

					BARRY 
			Let me think for a minute. We've got to come up with a 
			simple, yet absolutely ingenious and devilishly clever way
		            to get that dog to come out, instead of us having to go in... 

All of a sudden, the dog, a little white poodle with a name tag saying "snoogums" on the collar, comes trotting out through the doggy door, looking up the pair, who just stand there stunned for a few long seconds. Then, in a flash, Barry leans down, scoops up the poodle and the pair are off into the distance.

INT. JOHNNY'S HOME  - MORNING.

The Longbow family are getting themselves ready for another day, dad getting ready for work, mum preparing breakfast, Johnny getting dressed and Alan about to take the rubbish out through the back door

EXT. BACKYARD  -  MORNING.

Alan puts the rubbish in the wheelie bin and is about to come back inside when he hears a noise in the back shed. He wanders over and peeks in through the window, seeing the poodle.

					ALAN
			 Well, well, well, what do we have here? Found
			 yourself a little house for the night, did we?

INT.  PET SHOP  -  MORNING.

Only a young, male sales assistant named BOBBY is in the shop when Alan walks in with the dog. The 55 year old Oriental shop owner, MR LOO, is out at present. 

					ALAN
				 (to pet shop assistant)
			 How much will you give me for this? It's a 
			 family pet. But we're moving Interstate and can't
			 take it with us.

					ASSISTANT
			 Yeah, well, I don't usually make the purchases.
			 Mr Loo does all that. He should be back in an hour.

					ALAN
			 An hour! I can't wait that long. Can't you make a
			 decision for once in your life?

The assistant ums and arrs, then eventually makes a command decision.

					ASSISTANT
			  The best I can do is fifty bucks. Take it or leave it.

					ALAN
				 (disappointed but impatient)
			  Yeah, alright. I'll take it.

					ASSISTANT
					 (going to till)
			 So, what's it's name?

					ALAN 
			 Huh? 
				(then quickly checks the
				 name tag)
			Ohh, yeah. Snoogums.

					ASSISTANT
			 Is it a bitch?

					ALAN
				       (questioningly)
			 What!? I don't know. Seems to behave alright.

They both give each other stupid looks.  

INT.  CLASS ROOM  -  DAY.

Everyone but Kelly are sitting in class, the teacher preparing the students for the day's work. Johnny is looking at Kelly's empty seat, wondering where she is.

					CLIFFORD
					 (to Johnny) 
			You get the watch back?

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah, no worries. How was bowling last night?

					CLIFFORD
			 Great. I beat Barry. I was down and out when
			 all of a sudden I came home like a champion.
			 Should have seen me, Johnno. I put the big moose
			 right back in his box. I'm not kiddin'. I think I might
			 turn pro. Only trouble was, I made a bit of a fool
			 of myself by trying to impress Sally. I think she thinks
			 I'm an idiot without that other part...what did you
			 call it again? An idiot, what?

					JOHNNY
			 Idiot Savant.

					CLIFFORD
			Yeah. That's it. I think I called it something
			else. Made me look a bit stupid. Anyway. Should
			have seen me. I had that ball on a yo yo. I could
			make it do anything. Come to the alley tonight and
			I'll show you how I did it.

Johnny turns around to see Barry, looking down at his books, a big grin on his face. Johnny reads his mind.

					BARRY
				        (usual static)
WHERE'S KELLY? CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HER GO FOR LONGBOW'S THROAT. WHAT A LAUGH THAT'LL BE. ANYWAY, BACK TO SERIOUS BUSINESS. BULLSHIT, BULLSHIT, BULLSHIT. I MUST MASTER THE ART OF BULLSHIT. I WONDER IF THEY'VE GOT ANY BOOKS ON THE SUBJECT? MAYBE I SHOULD WATCH THAT PARLIAMENT QUESTION TIME ON TELE. THAT SHOW WHERE ALL THE POLITICIANS TALK. YEAH, LEARN FROM THE EXPERTS...

Johnny returns his attention to the front of the class, scratching his head.

					JOHNNY
					 (to self)
			 What's Barry on about?

					TEACHER
			 So. Today we'll be learning the...

FADE OUT: 

to the morning tea bell sounding.

INT.  SCHOOL CORRIDOR  -  DAY.

All the students are heading down the corridor to their lockers. When they arrive, Kelly is seen picking an almost hidden note from the vent of her locker. 

C.U.: on note, glued to a piece of paper are the letters of a cut up magazine, like a kidnappers ransom note. I KNOW WHO TOOK IT. LOOK IN LONGBOW'S BACK SHED. HE WANTS TO MAKE OUT LIKE HE FINDS IT TO LOOK LIKE A HERO.

					KELLY
			(turning on Johnny, hiding note in her pocket)
 			Let's go to your place for a minute. I want to see
			something.

					JOHNNY
			 What?

					KELLY
			 Come on. It'll only take a minute.

					JOHNNY
			 I don't understand.

					KELLY
			 I'll tell you when we get there. Come on.
				          (usual static)
I WANT TO SEE IF IT'S TRUE. I JUST WANT TO SEE IF IT'S TRUE.

EXT.  BACK YARD  -  DAY.

Johnny and Kelly walk down driveway into back yard.

					JOHNNY
			 Are you going to tell me what all this is about,
			 Kelly?

					KELLY
				        (usual static)
I JUST WANT TO SEE IF IT'S TRUE
			 I want to have a quick look in your back shed.

					JOHNNY 
					(frowning)
			 What? Why?

They get to shed and Johnny suddenly looks very nervous as he realises Barry has put something in the shed to incriminate him. He opens the door slowly, nervously. But the dog is gone. Kelly frowns with confusion.

					JOHNNY
			 Will you tell me what's going on now?

					KELLY
			 I heard you took Snoogums and hid her here.

					JOHNNY
			 Snoogums?

					KELLY
			 Yeah, my pet poodle. She's a white, purebred.

					JOHNNY
			 But why would I do that? 

					KELLY
			 How come you didn't come to the alley last night?
			 Remember you said you had something important
			 to do?

					JOHNNY
		             I did have something important to do. I had to...
					
					KELLY 
			Had to what?

					JOHNNY
					(blushing) 
			It was just some...family thing. 

					KELLY
					(dubious)
			Yeah, right. So you don't know anything about it?

					JOHNNY
			No. I don't. Honestly.

										CUT TO: 

Alan enters the back yard and heads to the back door of the house, wearing a brand new pair of sunglasses. He doesn't see Kelly and Johnny at the shed as he fiddles with a set of keys to get inside. Johnny reads his mind.

					ALAN
				        (usual static)
I SHOULD HAVE HELD OUT. THOSE PET SHOPS SELL THOSE POODLES FOR HUNDREDS. WHY DIDN'T I SHOP AROUND? OH WELL, WHO GIVES A STUFF.  ANYWAY, BETTER STASH MY NEW SUNNIES. CAN'T TAKE 'EM TO SCHOOL. THOSE PACK OF MONGRELS WILL PINCH THEM IN A SECOND.

Alan enters the house and closes the door behind him.

 					JOHNNY
				           (to Kelly) 
			 Listen.You go back to school, okay. I'll see what
			 I can do about finding your dog.

					KELLY
			 What can you do?

					JOHNNY
					 (lying) 
			I have a friend, a type of...pet detective. Yeah,
			he's really good. I'll track him down and see if he
			can help.

					KELLY
			Why don't I come with you then?

					JOHNNY
			 Ahhh, no. That's not a good idea.

					KELLY
				(giving him the guilty look)
			 Why not?

					JOHNNY
			 Ohhh, arrr, the guy I'm telling you about likes to
			 keep his identity secret. You see, he does a lot of
			 undercover work and he doesn't like anyone
			 knowing who he is.

					KELLY
				(angry, but wants dog back)
			 Oh, okay. I'll see you back at school then.
				         (usual static) 
IF I HAVEN'T GOT MY DOG BACK BY TOMORROW, I'M CALLING THE POLICE. 

Kelly walks off, looking over her shoulder suspiciously, like Johnny's story doesn't hold water. Johnny waits until she's gone, then sneaks in through the back door of the house.

INT.  HOUSE   -  DAY. 

Mum is out and Dad is at work, and just as Johnny goes in through the back door, his brother, Alan, leaves through the front door. Johnny grabs the sea salt from the kitchen and heads upstairs to the bathroom.

 INT.  PET SHOP  -  DAY.

The pet shop is on the corner of a quiet side street and a reasonably busy main road. It's a small shop and is owned by Chinese, MR. LOO. He has a young assistant, BOBBY.
 
We show the poodle in a wire cage at the rear of the shop. Above the poodle's cage is a PARROT, sitting on a perch like he owns the place. He is for sale, but is basically the shop mascot because he has never been sold. His wings are clipped and has never flown. He does however, have an uncanny knack of talking. Sometimes gibberish, sometimes sense. 

BOBBY is seen doing some work near the front counter for a few moments until finally, the owner, MR LOO enters.

					LOO
			 (very strong Oriental accent, to Bobby)
			 My bluffer. He make me sick. He alway wan to
			 come to Australie, but he no wanna work in my
			 shop. He wan open he own restaurant. I ter him.
				(spots the poodle)
			 What dis?

					BOBBY
			 Hey? Oh, that. Yeah. I paid fifty bucks for it. I
			 checked in the manual. It's worth six hundred,
			 or even more. It's a purebred.

					LOO
				         (frowning)
			 You do micro chip test first?

					BOBBY
				            (nervously) 
			Ohh, uhhm, I forgot.

					LOO 
			Are you clazy? Wha if dog storen properly?!

					BOBBY
			 (looking around for m'chip reading gun)
			 Sorry, Boss. I'll do it now. Have you seen the
			 chip checker?

					LOO
			 Never mine. You go eary runch. I do check.

Bobby grabs his coat quickly and hurries out through front of shop. Mr Loo is fossicking around looking for the microchip checker when an elderly lady comes in and spots the dog.

					LADY
			 Oh my. What a beautiful animal.

					LOO
			 (neglecting the chip checker for a quick sale)
			 I get in today. It purebled. You rike?

					LADY
			 Oh yes. She's beautiful. I had one just like this
			 back in England years ago. How much?

					LOO
				          (smiling) 
			For you, fife hundled.

					LADY
			 Really? I'll be right back. I've just got to go and
			 get my husband. He's next door in the hardware
			 store. Don't sell her to anyone else, okay?

The lady leaves, while Mr Loo is rubbing his hands together, going behind the sales counter. We then see him look up as if he noticed something invisible enter the shop (as Johnny comes in). He dismisses it, then goes back to rummaging behind the counter. We then see the lid of the dog cage lift up and the dog being picked up out of the cage. Then, purely by accident, the parrot drops off it's perch and lands on the neck of the poodle. The parrot starts squawking and flapping it's wings as Mr Loo suddenly looks up to see the poodle being carried out of the shop by the parrot, invisible Johnny no-where to be seen, as if the parrot is stealing the dog.    

					PARROT
			 Thief. 
				(squawks)
			 Stop thief!!!

Mr Loo's eyes go wide as he scurries from behind the counter and gives chase.

EXT.  STREET  -  DAY.

Invisible Johnny turns down the quiet side street, the dog and parrot under arm as he bolts off.

										CUT TO:

Mr Loo turning the corner, his eyes even wider as he stops dead in his tracks disbelieving what he is seeing. Then he starts giving chase.

					LOO
			 Sssssssss....somebotty...stop the pallot...he steering
			 my....he...

At the next corner, Invisible Johnny, the dog and the parrot suddenly turn left and out of sight. By the time Mr Loo arrives, all he sees is the parrot, standing on a residential fence, walking up and down talking, just about head high next to Mr Loo.

					PARROT
			 Dog gone...dog gone...where dog gone...?

					LOO
			(grabbing parrot and threatening to throttle him)
			 You ter me, smar arse. Where you hi dog?

					PARROT
			 Dog gone...he fry away...dog gone.

										CUT TO:

the lady and husband enter the pet shop. They see the dog gone, then wonder where Mr Loo is. Just then, Mr Loo re-enters, the parrot still firmly in his grasp.

					LADY
			 Oh. There you are. I've had a word with my husband
			 and he says you've got yourself a deal. Now, where
			 is that cute little pooch?

					LOO
			 Ret me ask you question...do you speak Chinese?

Both lady and man shake their heads.

					LOO
			 Good. (now Loo tells them exactly what happened in Chinese, using subtitles) He concludes by saying, if he told them in English, he's afraid they'd have him committed to a mental institution.

The lady and man look at one another

					LADY
			 What?

					LOO
			 Solly. Dog gone. How about pallot. This bird vely
			 special. No your ordinary pallot this one, ohhh no,
			 not by a rong shot.

The lady and man just look at each other, concerned with Mr Loo's state of mental health. Suddenly, Bobby enters the shop with a sandwich.

					BOBBY
			   (he sees the dog gone and grins)
			 See, boss. I knew it. That pooch wasn't gonna
			 last half a day before it flew out the door.

EXT.  SCHOOL YARD  -  DAY.

Johnny walks into the school yard to be greeted by Clifford near the front gates. Johnny is not carrying the dog, he has hidden it back at his place.

					CLIFFORD
			 Holy moly, I heard what happened? Kelly's furious.

					JOHNNY
			 Well, she doesn't have to worry anymore. I found her
			 dog. Where is she?

					CLIFFORD
			 Whoa whoa whoa, you don't understand. I over heard
			 her telling Sally that she's positive you took it. There's a
			 story goin' round that says you pinched it so you could
			 pretend to find it for her.You know, get into her good
			 books. She reckons you've told her some cock and
			 cow story about a pet detective. If you show up with
			 the dog now, you're history.

					JOHNNY
			 I don't believe this. This is absolutely unbelievable.
			 It's a set up. Barry's done all this. I despise that bloke!
			 Quick, come with me. I've got to show you something.

INT.   BATHROOM   -   DAY.

Johnny disappearing before Clifford's eyes.

					CLIFFORD
			 Sheeeeeeet. How'd you do that?

					JOHNNY
					 (invisible)
			 The eel got me again. That's why you beat Barry last
			 night. Not because you played great. I maneuvered
			 the ball for you and kept knocking his into the gutter.

					CLIFFORD
			 Jumpin' Geez. I can't believe it!

					JOHNNY
			Yeah. Watch this.

Johnny steps into the shower cubicle and turns on the fresh water. He stands under the water until he magically reappears. Clifford is just watching with his jaw dangling open.

					CLIFFORD
			 Amazing. You get zapped twice and get two
			 super powers and all I get is bit from a crab.
			 And I didn't even get to get Barry with it. What
			 a rip off!

					JOHNNY
			 Hand me a towel.

					CLIFFORD
				       (handing over towel)
			 And get this. I heard that Mr. Laidley sent the crab
			 off to the lab to get finger prints off it. He wants to
			 know who stuck it in the gym. Bloody hell. My prints
			 are all over it.

					JOHNNY
			 Don't be ridiculous. I saw them throw it in the dumpster.

					CLIFFORD
			 Really? Oh, good. That's a loan off my mind.
					 (beat)
			 So, where's the dog? 

					JOHNNY
			 In my dad's den. I was going to tell Kelly that 
			 Barry sold it to the pet shop and my, so called, pet
			 detective got it back for her. So much for that
			 idea, hey?

					CLIFFORD
				               (hums)
			You know what. I think I might have come up
			with an answer for you.

					JOHNNY
			 It's got nothing to do with sticking the dog in
			 Barry's locker, has it?

					CLIFFORD
			 Nah, nothin' like that. This is a brilliancy.

FADE OUT:

on Clifford grinning cheekily.

FADE IN:

to Thursday morning, about 8.30. a.m. 

EXT.   WRECKING YARD  -  MORNING.

Barry's father arrives to open the auto wreckers in his ute. When he gets out of his car, a police car pulls up beside him with two police officers. The police get out and approach the dad, who is just about to unlock the gates to the front of the yard.

					DAD
			 What can I do for you guys this fine morning?

				SENIOR CONSTABLE
			 We've had an anonymous tip that your son has
			 stashed a stolen, pedigree dog on these premises.

					DAD
				          (laughs)
			 Yeah right. The only dog on these premises, officer,
			 is a born and bred killer. Rip your arm off quick as
			 look at you.

				SENIOR CONSTABLE
			 Yeah well, you mind if we take a look for ourselves?

					DAD
			 Not at all. Better stand back. When I open these
			 gates ol' brutus'll be eager to get at you.

The two policemen put their hands near their weapons as they stand back, awaiting the gates to be opened. But, the moment the gates open, out trots little Snoogums, who gives out a tiny little yelp. They all look at each other.

				SENIOR CONSTABLE
			 So, is that the killer? Or the dog we're referring to?

					DAD
			  (mouth moving with no sound)

				SENIOR CONSTABLE
			 Well?

					DAD
			 I...I...I...I...

										CUT TO: 

the big bad Doberman, Brutus, looking out through the closed office window in the centre of the yard, the door locked shut. Johnny had obviously enticed it inside last night and released the poodle.

										CUT TO:

three men at gate.

				SENIOR CONSTABLE
			 Well. Looks to me like Brutus met his match.

				JUNIOR CONSTABLE
			 (picking up poodle and reading name tag)
			 So. How do you explain this, then?

					DAD
			 I...I...I...I...I...I...(devoid of bullshit)

INT.  SCHOOL CANTEEN  -  MORNING.

There are students wandering around and in and out of the canteen. Barry and Stewart are sitting side by side, at a table by themselves. They have a fruit juice each and sitting on the table in front of Barry is a fresh, untouched, pink iced donut.

					BARRY
			 I haven't seen Longbow around since yesterday.
			 You seen him?

					STEWART
				       (shaking head)
			Nah. Don't know where he is.

Barry turns his head in one direction, and Stewart the other, looking to see if they can spot Johnny. Then, out of the blue, invisible Johnny picks up Barry's donut and takes a bite out of it without anyone noticing. He then replaces it just as the pair look back at the table. They take a sip of their juices, when Barry sees that a bite has been taken out of his donut. Stewart is oblivious to it.

					BARRY
				         (to Stewart)
			 What do you think you're doin'?

					STEWART
			 Hey?

					BARRY
				     (indicates donut)
			 Why'd you take a chonk of my donut?

					STEWART
			 What are you talking about? I didn't have a chonk.

					BARRY
			 Well, I didn't have a chonk of it. And I know
			 I didn't buy it like that. So it had to be you.

Stewart opens his mouth, a little annoyed. 

					STEWART
			 Look. See any crumbs?

Barry just gives him a dismissive look.

INT.  BIOLOGY CLASS  -  MORNING.

Invisible Johnny is in the room somewhere. All the other students in Johnny's class are standing at benches (operating tables) with dead, hand sized frogs, laying on their backs before them. The frogs are all intact. The teacher, MR. LEGGE, is at the black board in the front of the class. The students have small operating kits to dissect their frogs at the teachers behest. Barry is in the back of the class, and at the bench (operating table) directly in front of him is Stewart, ready with his own frog. The teacher has his back to the students, writing on the blackboard. When Barry starts looking around the class to see where Johnny is, he spots Kelly far off to his right and stares at her for a few moments. Kelly is looking very queasily at the frog on her bench.
   Whilst Barry is distracted, invisible Johnny picks up Barry's frog and throws it into the back of Stewart's head. The frog sort of sticks there, until Stewart slowly turns to see who had done it. Then Barry turns back to the front of class and their eyes meet. At this point, Barry is unaware of what had just transpired.

					BARRY
				 (bemused, to Stewart)
			 What?

Stewart places a hand behind his head and peels the frog away. It makes a suction cup sound as he removes it and holds it in his right hand. He sneers at the frog, then notices that Barry's frog is missing. Stewart then sneers up at Barry

					STEWART
			 I told you! I didn't touch your stinkin' donut!

Stewart throws the frog with full power at Barry, but Barry weaves just in time for it to miss. The frog then sticks to the back wall.

Then Adam Weiss picks up his own frog and throws it at another kid, causing other kids to join in. Eventually, frogs are getting tossed everywhere, the teacher finding it impossible to control the students. The boys are having a great old time, but the girls are screaming with terror as frogs and pieces go flying all over the place. At this point Barry has not been hit, but the kid right next to him, SIDNEY BAYER, (who had lost eyebrows to Barry earlier) suddenly picks up his own frog and stuffs it firmly into Barry's face, rubbing it in like a Cagney grapefruit.

FADE OUT:

on teacher trying in vain to restore order.

INT.  HEAD MASTER'S OFFICE  -  MORNING.

Barry is sitting at the H.M.'s desk, squashed frog all over his face. The H.M. is sitting opposite, writing in a file. Eventually the H.M. speaks up, but keeps writing in the file.

					H.M.
			 So, Barry. What's your explanation for starting a
			 riot in biology?

					BARRY
			(leaning forward, as if it's a conspiracy)
			 Actually, sir. It started with a donut.

					H.M.
				 (looks up, frowning)
			(usual static as invisible Johnny mind reads)
THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD. A DONUT, HEY. I'VE NEVER HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE. 
			What?

					BARRY
			 You see, sir. A few days ago, I stashed a donut in my
			 dad's work safe. The next day it was gone...
				 (Barry nods slowly, pulling a face like the
				 Head Master should now understand 
				 exactly what he's on about)
			See where I'm comin' from, sir?

					H.M.
		     		          (warily)
			 Ohh, okay...
				(motions for Barry to continue)
			 Go on...

					BARRY
			 Well. Only me, my dad, and a mate of mine, who will
			 remain nameless 'cause I'm no dobber, know
			 the combo to the safe.

The H.M. continues to watch Barry very closely.

					H.M.
				       (usual static)
YEAH RIGHT. YOU MEAN STEWART SIMPSON.

					BARRY (cont)
			 You see. At first I thought my dad might have eaten
			  it. But today...
				 (looks around to see no-one else
				 is listening)
			 in the canteen, I bought a brand new, pink, iced donut
			 and when I wasn't looking, someone took a big bite
			 out of it. That's when I realised who took the one from
			 the safe.

					H.M.
				       (usual static)
UH OH. I THINK EXAM PRESSURE HAS SNAPPED BARRY'S BRAIN
			 Ohh...I see...Your mate. Is that why you threw
			 the frog in biology? Pay back?

					BARRY
			 Yes. I mean, no! I didn't actually throw the frog.
			 It just seemed to...I don't know, it just seemed to
			 hop up off the bench and go flying across the room
			 all by itself.

					H.M.
				        (bemused)
			 Tell me something. Why would...your mate, go to
			 all that trouble just for a couple of donuts?

					BARRY
			 (rolls eyes like the H.M.'s obtuse)
			 Because I always get great donuts. You know, like
			 some people find dollar coins and others sit on chewing
			 gum. I always get fresh, great tasting donuts.
			 It's just my thing. And my mate knows it, you see?

The H.M. lowers his head and starts writing in the file. He starts to speak about how he might arrange for Barry to see the school counsellor, when suddenly, invisible Johnny makes the front of the H.M.'s hair piece gently rise and fall, as if  the hair piece is doing the talking. Barry tries wiping some of the frog from his eyes to see if it's true. The H.M. doesn't even notice.
The H.M. Suddenly looks up.

					H.M.
			 Well...?

					BARRY
				       (blinking hard)
			 Actually, sir. I think I've got some of that stuff in my
			 eyes. I'm not seeing too well. It's starting to sting a
			 bit too.

					H.M.
			 Go on. Get to sick bay. Come back here the
			 moment you've had your eyes treated.

					BARRY
			 Yes, sir.

The H.M.'s phone rings just as Barry exits. It's the police saying they are bringing the dog back to Kelly.

INT.  SICK BAY CUBICLE  - MORNING.

Barry is sitting down with his head back while Nurse Williams, standing between his legs, rinses his eyes out. While this is happening, invisible Johnny gives the nurse a good solid pinch on the bum, making it look like Barry had done it. Nurse Williams stops what she is doing, and while Barry's eyes are shut, she steps back and gives him a solid slap to the face. Barry opens his eyes, startled, thinking this must be part of the cure.

					BARRY
			    (blinking hard, holding his cheek)
			 Ouch. Is that one of those new shock treatment
			 things?
			       	(nurse just glares at him while he
				 blinks until his eyes come good)
			 Beauty. Yeah, that's done it. Good as gold.

					NURSE
					(gruffly)
			 Right. You can go then. 

					BARRY
			 Oh. okay. Thanks, Nurse Williams.

The nurse scowls at him as he stands and heads for the door.

										CUT TO:

outside H.M.'s office. The two police officers and Barry's dad approach Kelly and the H.M., who are standing at the office door. Kelly is ecstatic about seeing her dog. She races up and takes it from the policeman and gives the dog a hug. 

				SENIOR CONSTABLE
					 (to Kelly)
			  Do you know a young man named Barry?

					KELLY
			 Yes. Why?

				JUNIOR CONSTABLE
			 We got an anonymous tip off that he hid the dog at
			 a wrecking yard. We don't know if he actually did it,
			 of course. It could just be one of those school kid
			 pranks. But if you want, we can have a word to him.

					KELLY
			 No, that's alright. I'm just glad to have her back.

				SENIOR CONSTABLE
			 Okay. The dog's not harmed. So as far as we're
			 concerned, that's the end of it.

The police exit. Kelly gives her dog a kiss and exits.

					H.M.
				    (to Barry's dad)
			 You do realise, I'm not going to be that easy on him.
			 He's just created a huge mess in the biology lab. 
			 You can expect Barry to be doing a lot detention
			 over the next few weeks.

					DAD
			 Yeah, well. That's nothing compared to what I've
			 got planned for him.
   
DISSOLVE ON:

dad and H.M. shaking their heads with disappointment.

FADE IN:

on school yard. At the bottom of the screen we lay out these words in big white letters: SEVERAL WEEKS LATER...THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL

EXT.  SCHOOL YARD  -  DAY.

Johnny, Barry and Clifford are all standing together in the quadrangle, arms folded, watching the comings and goings as students go about their daily business before class, the weather is fine and clear.

All of a sudden, Barry's best mate, Stewart, comes walking past the trio, holding Kelly's hand - heading off to the canteen, paying them no attention.

					JOHNNY
				 (to Barry and Clifford)
			 Who'd have ever thought Kelly would end up with
			 Stewart?

					BARRY
			 Hmmm. You know what? I get the feeling he double
			 crossed me.

					JOHNNY
			 What do you mean?

					BARRY
			 Ohh, no big deal. Just a few weeks ago we did
			 something together and, well. I think he might have
			 done the dirty on me.

					CLIFFORD
			 When did he get his teeth fixed?

					JOHNNY
			 Yeah, I was wondering that. Great smile.

					BARRY
			 Don't know. All I know is, ever since he got
			 zapped by an eel down at the beach he thinks
			 he's better than everyone else.

Johnny and Clifford exchange weird looks.

					CLIFFORD
					 (to Barry)
			 You gotta be kiddin' me?

Barry just shrugs and shakes his head.

Then, out of the blue, Sally comes walking up to Clifford and smiles.

					SALLY
			 Hi, Cliff. Are you doing anything over the holidays?

					CLIFFORD
			 Hey, who, me? No. Nothing. Why?

					SALLY
			 My oldies are on my case for getting a C in maths.
			 I was just wondering if maybe you could, you know.
			 Maybe come around and give me a hand. You know.
			 You teach me maths and I'll teach you about bugs.

					CLIFFORD
			 What? Really? I mean, sure, sounds great.

Sally and Clifford wander off together, leaving Johnny and Barry standing there alone, still pondering.

					JOHNNY
					 (to Barry)
			 So, what are you doing over the holidays?

					BARRY
			 Ahhhg, I gotta work seven days a week at my
			 dad's yard from eight in the morning 'till seven at
			 night. What are you gonna be doin'?

					JOHNNY
					 (shrugs)
			 Oh, I Don't know. Might just disappear for a while. 

										CUT TO:

the beach, just near the pier. An eel's head slowly emerges from the water like a periscope, a big grin on it's face as it espies a guy splashing around in the shallows, about thirty metres away. The eel then slowly submerges and the camera moves gradually toward the man.

FADE OUT:

                 The End