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                        "Beginnings"

                         written by

                        Jason Gulati
 



FADE IN:

EXT. JOEL E. FERRIS HIGH SCHOOL - MORNING

The sun is out. The parking lot is stacked with people and
moving cars.

Through the mess walks one EDISON CHONG, a short and rather
stocky Asian guy.

He exhales.

                         EDISON
            A fresh start.

FLASHBACK:

INT. MIDDLE SCHOOL GYMNASIUM - DAY

Edison is looking up, holding a basketball.

                         EDISON
            I would like to make one basket
            this semester.

He dribbles, steps back and launches the ball...

... only to have it bean a girl in the face. She drops a
makeup kit and falls over.

                         EDISON
            Oh, uh, I'm sorry!

Everyone rushes to her aid. DONNER SMITH, the gym teacher,
looks up at a frazzled Edison.

                         DONNER
            What is wrong with you, son?

EXT. JOEL E. FERRIS HIGH SCHOOL - CONTINUOUS

Edison grins.

                         EDISON
            Just what the doctor ordered.

He continues his walk and reaches the courtyard to greet his
friends, CHRIS DAVISSON, a tough, scruffy-looking guy, and
GREG GEORGE, a short kid with a nice tie to go with his old
jeans.

                         EDISON
            Man, I almost died in the parking lot.
 
                                                            2.


                         CHRIS
            I know, some guy in a brand new
            Hummer almost ran me over. And then
            he honked! Prick.

                         GREG
            If I drove a Hummer I'd want to run
            people over.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            But you know what, I'm still stoked
            to be here.

                         CHRIS
            What's to get excited about? This
            is still school, and it still sucks.

                         GREG
            Yeah, haven't you watched TV? The
            next four years are dominated by
            caffeine addictions and vacations
            with the principal!

                         CHRIS
            You're thinking of Saved by the
            Bell. Fast forward a decade.

Greg hesitates.

                         GREG
            The next four years are dominated
            by virginity pacts and and sex with
            baked goods!

                         CHRIS
            Welcome back.

                         EDISON
            School only sucked because we've
            been hanging at the lower end of
            the social ladder. But this is a
            clean slate.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            For Greg, it means the name "poop
            shoes" is gone.

Greg looks at his new, clean shoes.
 
                                                            3.


                         EDISON
            And for you, Chris, the
            embarrassment of someone putting
            your name on a love note is long gone.

Chris nods.

                         CHRIS
            And for you?

                         EDISON
            For me, it means I'm no longer the
            guy who disfigured Katie Moore with
            a basketball.

                         CHRIS
            Oh yeah. I believe 'bludgeoned' was
            the term used in the school paper.

Greg laughs.

                         GREG
            Who does their makeup in gym, anyway?

                         CHRIS
            So, great, what does all this mean?
            We get to climb the social ladder
            and be popular? I thought we agreed
            that being popular sucks.

Edison scoffs.

                         EDISON
            Look at us, so proud to be
            unpopular. But the cost is that we
            never get what we want. It's those
            guys we loathe so much that are
            getting all the parties, all the
            girls, all the credit.

Two girls walk by. One of them is the delectable, sultry
LAURA BECK, a divinely sculpted beauty. All three of the
boys gawk shamelessly in awe.

Edison points back at her.

                         EDISON
            See? I want that.

                         CHRIS
            I don't know.
 
                                                            4.


                         EDISON
            What's not to know? It wasn't a big
            deal in junior high because the
            girls were flat and plain, but now
            they're... hot.

They continue to argue. Meanwhile, the focus shifts over to
the two girls that had walked by. Laura is chatting with the
other girl, ASHLEY REDDING, a goofy girl clad in vintage
clothes.

                         LAURA
            How does my makeup look?

                         ASHLEY
            Would you stop worrying? You look
            great. Those three boys back there
            were ogling you like, well, horny
            schoolboys.

Ashley pats her on the back reassuringly.

INT. CLASSROOM - DAY

A seemingly pleasant teacher, TED ENGELS, is calling
attendance, marking the sheet as he goes along. Edison sits
quietly in the back. Eventually, Ted comes to a screeching
halt, as does his pen, which had been moving swiftly down
the sheet.

                         TED
            Edison Chang. Any relation to Donny
            Chang?

Edison looks up from his desk.

                         EDISON
            Who?

                         TED
            You know, Donny Chang. The comedian.

                         EDISON
            No.

                         TED
            Are you sure? You guys look similar.

Edison gets frustrated as people stare.

                         EDISON
            Yeah, all look same, buddy. Why do
            you people keep asking me this?
 
                                                            5.


                         TED
            Well, there aren't that many Changs.

                         EDISON
            Are you kidding? Chang is Asian for
            'Smith'.

                         TED
            Is that so?

                         EDISON
            Yeah. Can we move on, now?

                         TED
            Sure.

                         EDISON
                   (mutter)
            Jackass.

                         TED
            Oh, I thought we were done with it.
            But it sounds like you're dying to
            go to the office.

                         EDISON
            Not true. No, sorry, please go on.

                         TED
            I'm afraid that laundromat has
            closed, Mister Chang. Come up here
            to collect your very first office
            referral.

Edison hesitates.

                         TED
            This isn't optional.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

The hallway, now empty, is adorned with "Welcome Freshmen"
decor, as Edison casually strolls down the hall with an
office referral in his hand. Ashley is walking in the
opposite direction, looking very confused. She stops Edison.

                         ASHLEY
            Hey, can you help me with something?

                         EDISON
            Maybe, what's up?
 
                                                            6.


                         ASHLEY
            Well, you know, it's the first day
            of school, and I have no idea where
            I'm going.

                         EDISON
            You didn't go to orientation?

                         ASHLEY
            Yeah, but this place is so huge.

                         EDISON
            Isn't it? I kinda like it.

                         ASHLEY
            Why? I hate that I already can't
            find anything.

                         EDISON
            There's open air between my classes,
            I won't have to spend six hours
            daydreaming out the window.

                         ASHLEY
            Hmm.

                         EDISON
            I'm going to do it anyway, but it
            won't be about the weather.

                         ASHLEY
            Oh yeah? What'll it be, then?

                         EDISON
            Who knows.

He hesitates.

                         EDISON
            Maybe... it'll be... about you.

                         ASHLEY
            Neat.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            Too bad I haven't had a chance, I
            just got kicked out of my first class.

                         ASHLEY
            Well aren't you a rebel. What'd you do?
 
                                                            7.


                         EDISON
            Told the teacher he was a jackass.

                         ASHLEY
            For what?

                         EDISON
            Asking me if I was related to Donny
            Chang.

                         ASHLEY
            Are you?

                         EDISON
            Not that I'm aware.

                         ASHLEY
            You should look into it, it could
            be very beneficial for you.

                         EDISON
            I'm sure it would help if I knew
            who the hell he was.

She nods, then points at her schedule.

                         ASHLEY
            So do you know where this room is?

                         EDISON
            Actually, no. But you can come with
            me to the office, I'm sure they'll
            set you straight.

He waves his office referral.

                         EDISON
            That's why they're sending me there.

INT. LIBRARY - DAY

Greg is reading a "High Times" magazine. He grins. CLARA
LAUGHLIN, the librarian, walks over.

                         CLARA
            Excuse me, that is not school-
            sanctioned reading material! Where
            did you get that?

                         GREG
            Albertson's. Come on,
                   (sings)
            "It's your store!"
 
                                                            8.


He snickers. Clara is not amused.

                         CLARA
            Give me that!

She snatches the magazine from him.

                         CLARA
            Here, read this.

She hands him a copy of "Highlights", the kids magazine. He
glances over the cover and grumbles.

INT. CLASSROOM - DAY

Chris is sitting in his desk, fully taking notes.

INT. PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE - DAY

JOHN MCDICKER, a well-dressed old man, sits at his desk,
looking across to Edison.

                         JOHN
            So, why don't you tell me why
            you're here?

                         EDISON
            Well, Mister McDicker--

                         JOHN
            John, please.

                         EDISON
            John, I called my teacher a jackass.

                         JOHN
            Really. May I ask what for?

                         EDISON
            He asked me if I was related to
            Donny Chang.

                         JOHN
            That seems excessive.

                         EDISON
            I guess it was the pipe that broke
            the camel's legs.

                         JOHN
            That's not the expression.

                         EDISON
            Oh.
 
                                                            9.


                         JOHN
            In any case, Edison--

                         EDISON
            Mister Chang, please.

Beat.

                         JOHN
            Mister Chang, I know it's the first
            day of school, but do we need to go
            over the rules with you again?

                         EDISON
            No, no, I get it. You can't call
            your teachers jackasses.

                         JOHN
            Good. Now, if I file this referral,
            you're off to a bad start.

He rips it up.

                         JOHN
            So consider this your first and
            only freebie.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            What happens if I get another referral?

                         JOHN
            Detention.

                         EDISON
            You guys still have that? Detention
            is so nineties.

                         JOHN
            It's actually called in-school
            suspension. Same thing, new name.

                         EDISON
            Neat.

Beat.

                         JOHN
            You're free to go, Mister Chang.
 
                                                           10.


                         EDISON
            Come on, can't we talk about your
            kids? I don't want to go to class
            today.

                         JOHN
            Get yourself another office
            referral and we'll have plenty of
            time to talk about my family.

                         EDISON
            Good talking to you, John.

He leaves.

INT. CAFETERIA - DAY

It's crowded. The boys are in line waiting for food.

                         EDISON
            I wonder if the food's gotten any
            better here.

                         CHRIS
            We're big kids, we need to eat real
            food. I think they know that here.

                         GREG
            Remember when we dropped one of
            those burger patties on the floor?

                         EDISON
            Man, that thing got some serious
            air. Jordan would be proud.

Their line moves up so that they're standing in front of the
rather unappealing food.

                         EDISON
            Oh come on.

                         CHRIS
            It's the same kitchen staff.

                         GREG
            It's the same food.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

The three of them are sitting along the side with their
little trays of food. Edison picks up a fry. It droops.

                         EDISON
            Did they boil these?
 
                                                           11.


                         GREG
            At least they didn't fuck up jello.

He takes a bite.

                         EDISON
            How can you eat that shit?

                         GREG
            Why not? Bill Cosby said it's
            delicious. And it is!

                         EDISON
            Yeah, well, did he tell you how
            jello is made?

                         GREG
            No.

                         EDISON
            It's made from the boiled bones and
            marrow of animals.

                         GREG
            That's disgusting.

                         EDISON
            I know.

                         GREG
            No, I mean it's disgusting that you
            would try to ruin my favorite
            childhood snack by telling lies.
            You, sir, disgust me.

Edison looks puzzled.

                         CHRIS
            At least we use the entire animal
            when we kill it.

He pulls a clump of hair from his pizza.

                         CHRIS
            Which I can only assume is how they
            made this pizza.

Everyone reels in disgust.

                         EDISON
            So, how is everyone's first day
            panning out?
 
                                                           12.


                         GREG
            Bad. The librarian took my magazine
            and gave me a 'Highlights' instead.

                         EDISON
            What were you reading?

                         GREG
            'High Times'.

Beat.

                         GREG
            What?

                         CHRIS
            Well, I didn't know you were into that.

                         GREG
            I'm not. I'm just a potential
            customer... I like to read about
            things before I go and buy them.

                         EDISON
            So what'd you end up doing?

                         GREG
            Sat there and finished the puzzles.

                         EDISON
            You seriously sat in the library
            and finished a 'Highlights'?

                         GREG
            I colored it, too.

                         EDISON
            You're an interesting specimen, Greg.

                         GREG
            That's why you keep me around.

                         EDISON
            What about you, Chris? Let me guess,
            pretty lame.

                         CHRIS
            It was good.

                         EDISON
            What?
 
                                                           13.


                         CHRIS
            I actually found myself paying
            attention in one of my classes.

                         EDISON
            You? Dare I ask, why?

                         CHRIS
            My teacher... is so hot.

                         EDISON
            Really?

                         CHRIS
            Incredibly.

                         GREG
            That's gross.

                         CHRIS
            Why is that gross?

                         GREG
            Teachers are old.

                         CHRIS
            Well fuck, Greg, they start off
            their careers in their twenties.

                         EDISON
            How old would you say she is?

                         CHRIS
            Not a day over twenty-eight.

                         EDISON
            Twenty-eight is kosher. Kate
            Beckinsale is almost forty, and
            look at her.

                         CHRIS
            True.

                         EDISON
            You know, women are like Chinese
            take-out.

                         CHRIS
            Why?

                         EDISON
            No matter how old they are, they're
            always delicious.
 
                                                           14.


Beat.

                         GREG
            Yuck. Let's talk about something else.

                         CHRIS
            How's your first day, Edison?
            Climbing that social ladder?

                         EDISON
            Actually, I got kicked out of my
            first class.

                         CHRIS
            Donny Chang?

                         EDISON
            It never fails.

Ashley and Laura walk towards them and stop. Chris and Greg
are rather dumbstruck.

                         ASHLEY
            Hey, Edison, right?

                         EDISON
            You're uh, the lost girl. Ashley!

                         ASHLEY
            Yeah!

                         EDISON
            You ever get where you were going?

                         ASHLEY
            It turns out we were standing right
            in front of the room the whole time.

                         EDISON
            Seriously?

She nods.

                         EDISON
            I guess I was distracted.

                         ASHLEY
            Did you daydream about me?

He smiles.

                         EDISON
            No, I did luxury cars this morning.
            Maybe after lunch.
 
                                                           15.


She laughs. Laura nudges her.

                         ASHLEY
            Oh, this is Laura. Laura, this is
            Edison.

He reaches up to shake her hand.

                         EDISON
            Does she talk?

                         ASHLEY
            Usually.

Laura blushes.

                         LAURA
            Hey. That's a cool name. Like the
            inventor.

                         EDISON
            I like it. It's easy to write. Some
            Asians, they get these names that
            are twenty or thirty letters long,
            it's horrible.

Chris and Greg start nudging him hard.

                         EDISON
            Would you quit it? Ashley. Laura.
            These are my friends Chris and Greg.

They wave at each other.

                         ASHLEY
            Well hey, we gotta get going, but I
            actually stopped to ask you if you
            wanted to come to a party tonight.

Beat.

                         GREG
            Really?

                         CHRIS
            Seriously?

                         EDISON
            A party?
 
                                                           16.


                         ASHLEY
            Yeah, some sophomore is throwing it
            at his house tonight. Laura and I
            are going, you guys should totally
            come. No harm in having fun, right?

                         EDISON
            No, not at all. Why don't you give
            me your number so I can get
            directions from you?

                         ASHLEY
            Sure.

She pulls out a pen and scrawls it on Edison's palm.

                         ASHLEY
            Nice meeting you guys!

The guys wave in unison as they leave.

Greg and Chris look at Edison, then up at the girls, puzzled.

                         EDISON
            What?

INT. EDISON'S HOUSE - DAY

The guys are sitting around the TV, playing Halo.

                         CHRIS
            What is it with you and these
            fucking sticky grenades?

                         EDISON
            Don't hate.

He taps a few more buttons.

                         EDISON
            Because I'm pretty good with the
            sword, too.

                         CHRIS
            I hate you.

An explosion comes from the TV.

                         GREG
            Rocket beats scissors.

Beat.
 
                                                           17.


                         EDISON
            So, you guys wanna go to that party
            tonight, right?

                         CHRIS
            I'm in.

                         GREG
            I don't know, we've never been to a
            party.

                         EDISON
            What's to worry about? The whole
            concept behind a party is to have
            some fun.

                         GREG
            Yeah, but I don't know. This seems
            very not us.

                         EDISON
            So you'd rather sit here and play
            Halo all night.

                         GREG
            Maybe. It's comforting.

                         EDISON
            Girls invited us to a party and you
            want to sit here and play Halo.

Beat.

                         GREG
            Fine, I'll come, but dibs on Laura.

                         EDISON
            Oh, what?

                         GREG
            Hey, you had all day to call it. I
            got dibs.

                         CHRIS
            Why? You saw the way she was
            looking at Edison, you don't have a
            snowball's chance in hell.

                         GREG
            I know, I want my shot first.

                         EDISON
            Is there a time limit?
 
                                                           18.


                         GREG
            One month.

                         EDISON
            Are you out of your mind?

                         GREG
            These are the rules of dibs.

Edison looks at Chris.

                         EDISON
            Is this not ridiculous?

                         CHRIS
            It's ridiculous.

                         EDISON
            You know what, okay, I'll wait a
            month. I want to see what you're
            gonna do. Maybe you can teach me
            something.

                         GREG
            Good.

                         EDISON
            Great.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            You know, Ashley is cute.

                         CHRIS
            Oh, definitely.

                         GREG
            Yeah, I don't know.

                         EDISON
            Dissenting opinion, again?

                         GREG
            She's got that weird 'look at me
            I'm different' look going on.
            Screaming for attention.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            You wear expensive ties with your
            old jeans.
 
                                                           19.


                         GREG
            So?

                         EDISON
            Don't you think that screams for
            attention?

                         GREG
            I just like ties.

                         CHRIS
            So wear a suit.

                         GREG
            I hate suits. Just because I like
            ties I have to wear a suit?

                         CHRIS
            Ever heard of the phrase 'suit and
            tie'?

Beat. Greg punches a few more buttons.

                         GREG
            Like I'm going to take advice from
            a guy with four kills. You make
            Master Chief sad.

EXT. EDISON'S HOUSE - NIGHT

A minivan pulls up front.

INT. EDISON'S HOUSE - NIGHT

The doorbell rings. Edison opens the door. Laura and Ashley
are standing there wearing particularly sexy outfits.

                         EDISON
            Wow. You guys look incredible.

                         ASHLEY
            Thanks!

Laura blushes.

                         ASHLEY
            I guess you're still getting dressed?

                         EDISON
            No.

She laughs.
 
                                                           20.


                         ASHLEY
            I'm just teasing, you look good.
            Hop in!

Edison turns around.

                         EDISON
            Yo, ride's here!

He peeks out at the van.

                         EDISON
            Is your mom driving us?

                         ASHLEY
            No, she's out of town so I borrowed it.

                         EDISON
            Well done.

EXT. CARL'S HOUSE - NIGHT

The minivan pulls up behind a line of cars on the curb.
Everyone piles out.

                         EDISON
            So is this the house? Looks pretty
            quiet.

                         ASHLEY
            Actually, it's about three blocks
            that way.

                         GREG
            Seriously? Why?

                         ASHLEY
            You see all these cars in front of us?

                         GREG
            Yeah.

                         ASHLEY
            They're all going to the same party.

                         GREG
            Oh.

                         EDISON
            Nice.

Edison looks at a paper bag in Ashley's hands.
 
                                                           21.


                         EDISON
            What's this?

                         ASHLEY
            Just a little celebration gift I
            pulled out of my dad's liquor
            cabinet. I'll show you when we get
            there.

Everyone starts walking.

                         GREG
            So, Laura, right?

She nods.

                         GREG
            What are your thoughts on global
            warming?

EXT. CARL'S HOUSE - NIGHT

They step up to a modest-sized suburban home, sound booming
through the walls. Ashley opens the door and everyone steps in.

INT. CARL'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Immediately as they step in, CARL FLANNIGAN, a tall, robust
young man, approaches them.

                         CARL
            Hey, welcome to my abode! Can I get
            you guys a cup?

                         GREG
            For what?

Beat.

                         CARL
            For... for beer, dude.

He points at a keg, surrounded with people.

                         GREG
            Oh. No thanks.

He glances at Laura.

                         GREG
            I like to have fun without drinking.

                         EDISON
            I'll take one.
 
                                                           22.


                         CHRIS
            Me too.

                         CARL
            Cool, that's five bucks.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            Each?

                         CARL
            Uh, yeah.

Chris points at the crowded keg.

                         CHRIS
            For that?

                         CARL
            Hey, beer ain't cheap, man.

                         EDISON
            I think some of it is.

                         CARL
            If you don't like it, don't drink it.

                         EDISON
            I'm very frugal, five bucks for a
            cup isn't going to work.

                         CARL
            Fine, whatever.

He walks away.

                         CHRIS
            What a prick. Here, watch this.

Chris picks up a few abandoned cups and empties them on the
floor, then hands one to Edison.

                         CHRIS
            Now let's get some booze.

Ashley holds up her paper bag.

                         ASHLEY
            Why don't you guys just drink with us?

                         EDISON
            But this is free!
 
                                                           23.


                         CHRIS
            True story.

She sighs.

                         ASHLEY
            Alright, if you get tired of
            waiting in line, we'll be over there.

She points at an empty card table and walks over there with
Greg and Laura. Chris and Edison squeeze their way through
the crowd.

                         EDISON
            So, how do you think Greg's doing?

                         CHRIS
            I'm no expert, but "what are your
            thoughts on global warming" may be
            the worst line ever.

Edison laughs.

                         EDISON
            I agree. And then he turns down
            free booze.

                         CHRIS
            He's trying pretty hard.

                         EDISON
            I can't wait until dibs expires.

Beat.

                         EDISON
            You don't think he'll pull it off,
            do you?

                         CHRIS
            I doubt it. Don't worry, man.

                         EDISON
            I'm not worried.

Back at the card table, Greg has his arm around Laura, who
is sipping on a mixed drink. Ashley pours herself a shot of
what appears to be rum.

                         ASHLEY
            How is it?

Laura takes another sip.
 
                                                           24.


                         LAURA
            It's just right. You sure you don't
            want any?

He looks at her.

                         GREG
            Maybe a little.

He takes a sip off of her drink.

                         GREG
            Hey, this is pretty good. So, tell
            me, what are you into?

                         LAURA
            Hmm, I don't know. I guess I like
            to paint.

                         GREG
            Oh yeah?

                         LAURA
            Yeah. I do it a lot on the weekends.
            Does Edison paint?

Meanwhile, Chris and Edison haven't moved an inch in line.

                         EDISON
            This is horrible.

                         CHRIS
            Let's just try to push through.

They try to shift their way to the front, but get pushed back.

                         CHRIS
            What's the hold up?

A GUY turns around.

                         GUY
            The tap broke.

                         CHRIS
            Oh, great.

Back at the card table...

                         LAURA
            So do you think Edison likes brunettes?

                         GREG
            I... I guess.
 
                                                           25.


She plays with her hair.

                         LAURA
            Oh, I hope he does.

Ashley laughs.

                         GREG
            Just what is your obsession with my
            friend?

She blushes again.

                         LAURA
            Honestly?

                         GREG
            Seriously. I don't get it.

                         LAURA
            He sorta looks like Donny Chang.

                         GREG
            You can't be serious.

He picks up her drink and finishes it.

Back in line, the guys finally make their way to the front.

                         EDISON
            Oh, yes, finally.

                         CHRIS
            Fill 'er up!

The same guy looks at them.

                         GUY
            Oh, man, the keg is killed.

He flicks the metal, a hollow echo comes through.

                         CHRIS
            Oh come on.

                         EDISON
            This is why I didn't want to pay.

Carl walks up behind them.

                         CARL
            I knew you guys didn't pay for those!
 
                                                           26.


                         EDISON
            We never got any beer anyway.

Edison hands his cup to Carl.

                         EDISON
            Fuck it, there's a table of girls
            who wanted to hang out with us and
            Greg's got them all to himself.
            Let's go over there.

Chris drops his cup. Carl grabs their collars as they walk away.

                         CHRIS
            You're holding my collar there, bud.

                         CARL
            I knew you guys were bad news the
            second you walked in.

                         EDISON
            Don't be ridiculous. It wasn't
            until we told you we weren't paying.
            That was at least a couple of
            minutes later.

Carl pulls a little harder.

                         CHRIS
            What's the big deal? The thing was
            empty when I got to it anyway.

                         CARL
            It's the principle.

                         EDISON
            You invited strangers to get drunk
            at your house and you're stuck on
            principle? Spare me.

                         CARL
            Hey, look, I call the shots here.
            It's my party.

                         EDISON
            And you'll cry if you want to.

                         CARL
            Would you like to show yourselves
            out or do you need some help?

                         EDISON
            Fine, I just need to gather up the
            troops.
 
                                                           27.


Carl shoves him as he heads towards the back. People start
to look.

                         CARL
            I'm not falling for that.

                         EDISON
            Is this really necessary?

Edison dusts off his shirt.

                         CARL
            Hey, I asked you nicely already.

Edison points at Chris.

                         EDISON
            Can he go in and get my friends?
            I'll wait here as collateral, if
            that makes you feel better.

                         CARL
            Nope. You both gotta go.

                         CHRIS
            Isn't there something else you
            should be doing?

                         CARL
            Like what?

                         CHRIS
            Oiling your biceps? Showering with
            boys in the nude?

                         CARL
            I'm going to give you three seconds
            to be out the door.

                         EDISON
            And if we aren't?

                         CARL
            Wait and see. One.

                         CHRIS
            Maybe we should just leave.

                         CARL
            Two.

                         EDISON
            No, now I'm curious.
 
                                                           28.


                         CARL
            Three.

                         EDISON
            I pray tell, what could you possibly--

Carl lands a swift punch on Edison.

EXT. CARL'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Everyone walks towards the car while Edison touches his new
black eye and Chris pours over his swollen hand.

                         EDISON
            It got dirty in there.

                         CHRIS
            Sticky, even.

                         ASHLEY
            So what happened?

                         EDISON
            We were caught trying to get free beer.

                         CHRIS
            That we never got.

                         ASHLEY
            So they stopped you.

                         CHRIS
            No, the keg went dry and the big
            guy overheard us griping.

                         EDISON
            And he asked us to leave.

                         ASHLEY
            Clearly, you didn't.

                         EDISON
            We didn't.

                         CHRIS
            Actually, we offered to leave if we
            could come get you guys.

                         EDISON
            He refused. Then we argued
            semantics for a few minutes until
            he punched me in the face.
 
                                                           29.


                         CHRIS
            Basically.

                         ASHLEY
            It all makes sense now.

Beat. Greg and Edison lag behind everyone.

                         EDISON
            So, Greg, how's your new project going?

                         GREG
            It's uh, it's going good. Making a
            lot of headway here. Tonight.

He stumbles a bit.

                         EDISON
            Have you been drinking?

                         GREG
            Maybe.

Edison laughs.

                         GREG
            Don't even start.

Edison steadies Greg.

                         EDISON
            Come on, let's get you home.

                                            FADE OUT.