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THE LUNCHROOM
Episode Seven
"Orion in the Sky"
Teleplay by
Edward Drogos & Melinda Waterman
Story by
Bruce Snyder
Created by
Bruce Snyder
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
Bruce Snyder
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
Vincent Biga
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
Edward Drogos
STORY EDITOR
Melinda Waterman
CONSULTING PRODUCER
Max Majernik
CAST LIST
Will Cooper.................................
Joel Mayberry...............................
Brian Vandele...............................
Brock Warner................................
Reicther....................................
Casey Jennings..............................
Chris Hughes................................
Stacy Cifaretto.............................
Ellen Conner................................
Cathy Phenis................................
Mr. John Parker.............................
GUEST CAST LIST
Marilyn.....................................
Ms. Diane Ballard...........................
Dave Attanasio..............................
Kate Davidson...............................
Nick........................................
Manager.....................................
Copyright © Bruce Snyder
TEASER
FADE IN:
INT. GYM - AFTERNOON
(SONG BEGINS: General Public's "I'll Take You There")
Scattered throughout the school gym are various pieces
of the set for "My Fair Lady" and are being worked on by
the members of the cast. MS. DIANE BALLARD smokes a
cigarette a few feet outside the exit door while MR.
JOHN PARKER supervises the construction.
Laid out on two saw horses is a door that WILL COOPER is
drilling in a hole for the door knob. He picks up the
drill and begins to drill through the wood. The door
begins to shake and Will has to hold on to hit harder
and continues to drill.
A few feet in front of him is ELLEN CONNER. She is with
another Actor and are sanding different part of the set.
Will keeps looking up at her, but then back at what he's
drilling, then back at Ellen.
The sander skips over the wood and saw dust gets all
over Ellen, in her hair and in her clothes. Will glances
up again, and continues to watch her as she shakes her
hair out and pulls her shirt up and begins to shake it
out, revealing her chest and a little bit of her bra.
Will finally looks down to the drill. It had drilled
through the little bit of skin between his middle and
index finger.
WILL
OH JUMPING JESUS ZOMBIE!
SONG FADES AWAY.
SMASH CUT TO:
OPENING CREDIT SEQUENCE:
Marvin Gaye's "Ain't That Peculiar" plays over the
credits.
AFTER CREDITS:
FADE TO:
INT. VANDELE HOME - STACY'S BEDROOM - AFTERNOON
Stacy sits at her desk by her window packing her books
and papers into a box. All of a sudden she hears a
knock at her window. She looks up to see that a small
stone hits her window. Stacy opens her window and sticks
her head out.
STACY
Oh my god.
EXT. VANDELE HOME - CONTINUOUS
MARILYN is standing outside her window smiling at Stacy
with a handful of rocks in her hand.
STACY
Marilyn, what are you doing here?
MARILYN
"Love for thy love, and hand for
hand I give!"
STACY
What?
MARILYN
"Let lips do, what hands do."
STACY
Why are you reciting Shakespeare to
me?
MARILYN
I'm trying to woo you...Oh wait...We
should be woo'd and were not made
to woo.
STACY
(giggles)
Stop.
(looks around to
see if anyone's
watching)
Well, I mean, not here.
MARILYN
Well it's a rather tall climb up a
rather steep incline. Or can I use the
front door?
STACY
Sure.
Stacy closes her window, and Marilyn puts down the
rocks, looks at her watch and walks out front.
CUT TO:
INT. GYM - LATER
Will is on the stage floor lying back with Ellen by his
head and a number of students surrounding them as Ms.
Ballard wraps up Will's hand. Parker hovers around in
the background observing Ballard.
PARKER
You know you really should have
done this in a sterile environment.
There are too many germs around
here. Could be infectious.
WILL
(worried)
Infections?
BALLARD
Don't worry, I'm trained. I've
sterilized everything.
WILL
Wait, what do he mean infections?
PARKER
You should have really done this in
my office.
WILL
(to Ellen)
Infections?
ELLEN
Don't worry. You'll be fine.
Will looks at her and notices that one of her buttons is
still undone and tries to lean back a little more to see
inside.
CUT TO:
INT. BURGER PLACE - SAME
CHRIS HUGHES and KATE DAVIDSON enter and begin to walk
toward the counter. In Chris is fiddling around in his
pocket, until he pulls out a small bottle of PILLS.
KATE
You going to order?
Chris quickly puts the pills behind his back.
CHRIS
You first.
Kate turns to the KID behind the counter. Chris slides
the pills back into his pocket.
KATE
I'll have a double vagile burger no
onions and a diet coke please.
CHRIS
Same for me.
The kid behind the register rings up the order, Chris
pays, and he and Kate smile at each other waiting for
their food. The Kid brings them their tray and they take
them and walk over to a table.
KATE
I'll be right back, going to wash
up.
CHRIS
This is a burger joint, if the
staff doesn't why should you?
Kate smiles and walks to the bathroom. Chris looks to
make sure she is gone and takes out the bottle of
Prozac from his pocket, opens it and shakes one pill
out.
He lifts the bun of Kate's burger and places the pill in
there. He quickly hides the bottle and looks around
making sure no one saw him.
CUT TO:
INT. VANDELE HOME - STACY'S BEDROOM - LATER
Stacy is putting some stuffed animals from the back of
her closet into a plastic bag. Marilyn is sitting on the
edge of her bed, amused by the stuff animals.
MARILYN
Stuff animals?
STACY
Oh, that's some pretty big words
from someone who keeps a Pee-Wee
Herman doll...
(pause)
...in it's original box.
MARILYN
Hey, you forgot Chairie. And
besides another ten years, I'll be
in the money with that stuff.
Stacy continues to shuffle through the closet. Marilyn
reaches over and picks up a poster. She unfolds it to
reveal it's a poster of a star constellation.
MARILYN
What is this?
STACY
Oh, I forgot about that. That's my
souvenir from space camp.
Marilyn shoots Stacy a "what the hell" look.
STACY
I'm only young and stupid once in my life.
Marilyn sighs again.
MARILYN
What is it anyway?
STACY
It's Orion. I don't know why, but I
really liked it.
Marilyn continues to look over the poster, while Stacy
shuffles through her desk.
STACY
God, I never knew I have so much
stuff. This is unbelievable.
MARILYN
Yeah, well actually, I can believe
it now.
STACY
What do you mean?
MARILYN
I'm all packed up. I'm moving
tonight.
Stacy stops and turns to Marilyn, she looks absolutely
shocked.
MARILYN
(off Stacy's look)
I know, that's how I felt.
Stacy sits down and Marilyn sits down next to her.
STACY
Where are you going? For how long?
What are you going to do?
MARILYN
Well, that sort of depends on you.
STACY
(confused)
Me?
Marilyn pauses for a moment.
MARILYN
Come with me. Let's run away
together.
STACY
What?
MARILYN
Yeah, we'll go to New York or
Chicago or...hell, even Maine. Yeah,
look we're both all ready packed,
I've got my Mom's truck, we'll just
go and live together.
STACY
Marilyn...
Stacy lets out a small chuckle and notices that Marilyn
is not laughing.
STACY
Oh shit.
MARILYN
What?
STACY
You were serious...I was afraid of
that.
Small beat.
MARILYN
Stacy, it'll be perfect, the
opportunity is just waiting for us
to act on it.
STACY
You want me to run away with you
Somewhere? Just like that? Just go
in your car and leave everything?
MARILYN
Well, actually it's a truck...and
yeah, that's the plan.
Stacy looks down, trying to take all of this in. The
doorbell rings.
MARILYN (CONT'D)
Fuck every other person in the world!
STACY
I'll be right back.
MARILYN
No, wait.
STACY
I won't forget. I have to answer the door.
Stacy walks out, closing the door behind her. She stops
and takes a deep breath, and walks down the stairs.
INT. VANDELE HOME - FOYER - CONTINUOUS
Stacy opens the door to reveal that DAVE ATTANASIO is
standing there, with a big idiotic grin on his face.
DAVE
Howdy-hey, Stacy!
STACY
HOLY FUCKING ASS CRACKERS!
DAVE
What?
STACY
Dave...sorry. Hi, I can't believe
you're here.
Dave steps in to give her a massive BEAR hug. She takes
two steps forward, keeping him on the stoop for the hug.
DAVE
I didn't mean to just appear like
this but I had to see you. Can I
come in?
STACY
(stepping aside)
Uh, sure. For a second.
Dave enters and she closes the door.
DAVE
Can we talk?
Dave starts to climb up the stairs.
STACY
Yeah...wait, where are you going?
She jumps up two steps and tries to pull him back down.
DAVE
Your room. I have to talk to you.
Dave gets free and climbs the rest of the stairs, Stacy
follows quickly, trying to get his attention, and make
him come back downstairs.
STACY
Well, wait, I'm packing, you can't
get in.
Dave turns down the hallway and heads closer to Stacy's
room. Stacy runs up and jumps in front of him, making
him stop.
DAVE
What's the problem?
STACY
It's messy in there, I'm packing
my underwear...
DAVE
I've seen your underwear before...
(long pause)
Because we did "it."
He giggles like an idiot, followed by a pause.
DAVE
Remember?
STACY
(overlapping)
Yeah, I remember.
Dave tries to move up the stairs again but Stacy stops
him.
STACY
No, wait, my Mom's in her room,
she might hear us. Let's go
somewhere else.
DAVE
Okay.
Stacy's door opens and Marilyn stands there looking at
Stacy.
MARILYN
Who are you talking to?
She then sees Dave.
MARILYN (CONT'D)
Hello.
Stacy puts her hand over her mouth, looking nervous.
CUT TO:
INT. BURGER PLACE - LATER
Chris sits nervously looking at Kate's hamburger. He
takes a drink of soda, and stares at the burger again.
Kate walks back from the bathroom, and sits down.
KATE
I'm back. God, I'm hungry. Thanks
for waiting.
Chris laughs nervously as Kate takes her first bite of
food.
KATE (CONT'D)
Mmm...this is good.
Chris smiles.
CHRIS
Good.
Kate eats some more, Chris watches her.
KATE
What?
CHRIS
Huh?
KATE
(giggles)
You can't take your eyes off me can
you?
CHRIS
Huh?
She laughs and takes another bite of her burger. Chris
absentmindedly picks up his burger and takes a bite. He
begins to chew and becomes aware of how bad it tastes
and has difficulty in swallowing it.
KATE
How is it?
Unable to speak, Chris nods franticly and tries to
smile.
CUT TO:
INT. VANDELE HOME - STACY'S BEDROOM - LATER
Dave walks into Stacy's room.
MARILYN
Hi, I'm Marilyn.
She extends her hand.
DAVE
(shaking it)
Dave. I met you before.
MARILYN
Yeah.
STACY
You've met?
DAVE
Yeah.
MARILYN
At your graduation.
Stacy grimaces as it all comes back to her.
DAVE
Stacy...I'd hate to do this in front
of your friend but I’ve got to...
Pause. Stacy knows what's coming.
STACY
Oh Jesus.
DAVE
Stacy Hamilton!
STACY
Um, actually it's Cifaretto.
DAVE
Oh...Stacy Cifaretto, I love you!
Long pause. Stacy sighs and covers her face. Marilyn
begins to giggle.
MARILYN
Oh...these good times are killing me.
DAVE
Hey what's so funny? I'm pouring my
heart and soul here.
MARILYN
It's kind of a lost cause there,
Dave.
DAVE
What? It can't be!
(to Stacy)
Those were the best two months of
my life.
MARILYN
What two months?
DAVE
Earlier this year. It was April
till about June, I think.
Marilyn gives Stacy a look, who replies with nervous
laughter.
MARILYN
What? like you guys hung out or
something?
DAVE
(scoffs)
No, we dated.
Marilyn now has her mouth wide open in surprise.
STACY
(nervous)
I...I, uh never thought the two of
you would be in the same room.
MARILYN
Stacy...couldn't have done that.
DAVE
Well, she did.
MARILYN
But she's a lesbian. She's not into
men.
DAVE
Look, I -
Dave stops and begins to stare off. Long pause. Marilyn
waves her hand in front of him.
MARILYN
I think I put him in a trance.
Snaps fingers.
DAVE
(to Stacy)
YOU'RE A LESBIAN?!
STACY
Well...kinda.
Long pause.
DAVE
...Are you sure?
MARILYN
I know for a fact she's a Lesbian.
For I am her girlfriend. As such, I
have made love to her.
DAVE
Well, I had sex with her too.
Pause.
MARILYN
(to Stacy)
You were sleeping with a man when
were dated?
DAVE
(to Stacy)
You slept with another girl while
we dated?
MARILYN
(to Stacy)
You know how fucking angry that
makes me!
DAVE
(to Stacy)
You know how turned on that makes
me?
MARILYN
Shut the fuck up!
(to Stacy)
Why? Why did you do it?
STACY
Well, I had never been with a man
before...and, I...just...
She trails off.
MARILYN
So what, this means your straight
now, or something?
STACY
No, no, no! Trust me, I'm gay.
DAVE
Hey! What's that suppose to mean!?
STACY
It just wasn't as..."impressive" as
it usually is with Marilyn.
DAVE
But you said it was a good size!!
MARILYN
Not that you fucking twat berry. It
means you failed to turn her to the
"dark side."
Dave nods, and seems a bit relieved. But after a second
it fully hits him what Marilyn says. Stacy goes over to
Marilyn and holds her hand.
STACY
Marilyn, I only did it because I
wasn't sure. I wasn't sure if I was
gay or straight or what. But I
found out through Dave's..."below
average" performance that I'm gay...
and that I am truly am in love with
you.
Long pause.
DAVE
Hey, I just realized in some form
or another we've all had sex with
each other.
Marilyn breaks free of Stacy's grip and begins to hit
Dave.
MARILYN
You dumb motherfucker!
DAVE
OW! STOP IT!
Stacy pulls Marilyn back.
DAVE
I was just pointing out a fact!
Marilyn again pulls away from Stacy.
STACY
Marilyn, I don't know what to say.
It's complicated.
Marilyn scoffs.
MARILYN
Complicated. I tell you I love
you, and it's complicated?
She shakes her head and leaves. Long pause.
DAVE
Well, it's easy to see who won this
war.
Dave smiles and puts his arm around Stacy's shoulder.
Stacy gives him a look.
SMASH CUT TO:
EXT. VANDELE HOME - SECONDS LATER
The front door flies open and Dave is HURLED through it.
He lands, head first, on to the front yard.
CUT TO:
INT. AUDITORIUM - SAME TIME
Ellen is standing at the edge of the stage, very into a
newspaper crossword. Will, with a bandaged hand, walk
by. He stops and takes a few steps back. He begins to
look over her shoulder at the crossword.
After a few seconds, Ellen raises her head and turns to
Will.
ELLEN
Hi, Will.
WILL
(without looking
up)
Hey -
ELLEN
Whatcha doin'?
WILL
Well, I figure I could help you.
Ellen smiles and takes a few steps her to her right.
ELLEN
I'm good.
Will quietly takes a few steps and tries his hardest to
see over her shoulder.
WILL
Have you gotten 31 down yet?
ELLEN
Nope.
Pause.
WILL
It's "Quaintness."
She playfully hits him in the shoulder.
WILL
Ow, what was that for?
ELLEN
I could've gotten it.
WILL
Looked like your were struggling.
ELLEN
I can do this crossword puzzle by
myself, thank you very much.
WILL
Oh you can?
ELLEN
Yes.
WILL
What's 54 across then?
ELLEN
54 across?
WILL
Yeah.
She reads it over, and begins to think. After a few
seconds it becomes clear that she doesn't know.
WILL
(impersonation)
Like zoinks, Scoob! This chick
doesn't know the answer.
She playfully hits him again.
ELLEN
I will beat you like red headed
step child if you don't stop.
WILL
Come on! It's easy.
(reading)
"Cinderella Man Actor"
Ellen thinks harder.
ELLEN
(to herself)
Shit. I should know this.
WILL
- But you don't. It's Russell Crowe.
A cocky smile comes across his face.
WILL
I'd hate to say it, but I am little
less then a God when it comes to
crosswords.
ELLEN
Oh yeah? How about this one, 12 down.
WILL
(reading)
"Secretary of the State."
Will scoffs.
WILL
That would be Ms. C.J. Parker.
Will begins to walk away. Ellen thinks on this.
ELLEN
That was a character from "The West
Wing!"
Too late. Will's gone backstage.
INT. BACKSTAGE - CONTINUOUS
Will walks backstage and over to the dressing rooms.
There is a crowd standing outside the guys room
where Will has to stop. Mr. Parker pushes his way
through the crowd to Ms. Ballard.
PARKER
Okay, what's the problem?
BALLARD
The boys dressing room door is
locked.
Parker goes over to the door and tries to turn it. He
shakes it up and down and still it won't open.
BALLARD (CONT'D)
Yeah, tried that, didn't work.
(beat)
I'll go get the janitor.
PARKER
Yeah, good luck with that.
BALLARD
(turning around)
What does that mean?
PARKER
You do know that it is after 4 PM.
BALLARD
Yes, thank you for confirming that
for me.
A kid dressed head to toe in wool with an heavy black,
wool beard walks up to them.
BALLARD
What is it, Nick?
NICK
You know, this is all in wool, and
it's really hot, so what's the
problem with the door?
PARKER
Nick, not now! I'm thinking.
Nick walks away and Parker and Ballard continue to stare
at the door.
PARKER (CONT'D)
I'm going to my office to think.
BALLARD
Look, we are co director's and have
to work together.
PARKER
Fine.
BALLARD
So this isn't the first time a
doors been locked, what do you
think we should do?
PARKER
(he examines the lock)
We need some sort of wire and maybe
I can stuff it in the lock or
something.
BALLARD
(sarcastic)
Good plan. But I'm all out of wire
today.
PARKER
So, you're that perky without
support.
Ballard glares at him.
CUT TO:
INT. BURGER PLACE - LATER
Chris and Kate are still around, finishing up their meals.
CHRIS
And then I told them -
Kate takes the last bite of her veggie burger. All of a
sudden she stops chewing and a look of horror comes on
her face.
KATE
Oh my god!
She drops her veggie burger.
CHRIS
What?
Kate begins to choke.
CHRIS
Oh Jesus!
Chris runs over and starts to the Heimlich on her. After
a few seconds she spits out a couple of the pills.
She runs away into the bathroom.
CHRIS
Shit, those pills were expensive.
He picks up the food from the floor. The MANAGER walks
over.
MANAGER
Is there some sort of problem?
CHRIS
Um, I don't think so.
Kate comes back, she looks very angry.
KATE
(to Manager)
There were pills in my burger!
MANAGER
Pills? Miss, I can assure you we
didn't put any kind of pills in
your food.
Kate seems like she's about to say something but stops.
She turns to Chris.
KATE
Chris, help me out. Tell him about
the pills.
Chris seems conflicted. He looks at the Manager then
back at Kate, who looks very distraught. Chris takes a
few steps toward the manager.
CHRIS
IS THIS HOW YOU RUN A FUCKING
ESTABLISHMENT!
(quietly)
I'm so sorry.
(out loud)
SHE COULD HAVE CHOKED TO DEATH!
(quietly)
This is my fault, I'm really,
really sorry.
(out loud)
I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU GUYS
DOING PUTTING DRUGS IN HER FOOD! WE
COULD FUCKING SUE YOUR ASSES!
(quietly)
Just play along. This is all for
show.
(out loud)
IF YOU EVER DO THIS AGAIN, I'LL
KICK YOUR IGNORANT FAT ASS INTO
NEXT WEEK!
Kate seems both surprised and pleased by this. The
manager seems to be completely scared beyond belief.
CHRIS
Let's get out of here.
Chris and Kate, with his arm around her, begin to leave.
Before they leave. Chris grabs a trash can and pushes it
over dumping the insides.
They leave. There's a long pause. Everyone seems to be
in shock.
CUT TO:
EXT. STREET - MINUTES LATER
Chris and Kate are walking down the street. Kate rests
her head on Chris' shoulder, who seems mortified at what
he's just done.
CHRIS
(to himself)
What the hell have I done.
CUT TO:
INT. BACKSTAGE - DRESSING ROOMS - DAY
Parker and Ballard a working a hanger in the dressing
room lock. The hanger breaks and they stop.
PARKER
Damnit.
BALLARD
What if we try to jimmy the lock.
Do you have a credit card?
PARKER
No way. Have a magnetic tracking
advice in my pocket. I'll keep my
whereabouts and sperm to my self
thank you very much.
ELLEN
I'm really not surprised by that.
Will and Ellen are standing with the other actors
watching Ballard and Parker arguing.
ELLEN (CONT'D)
God, they've been at this for ever.
Why don't they just kick in the
door?
Will gets an idea and pushes his way through the crowd.
CUT TO:
INT. STAGE - CONTINUOUS
(MUSIC MONTAGE: Seal "Kiss of a Rose")
Will walks over to the drill he'd been using earlier,
picks it up, gives it a drill and takes it to the back
to the dressing rooms.
INT. BACKSTAGE - DRESSING ROOMS - CONTINUOUS
Parker and Ballard have moved their argument to the
little private office they had constructed. Will pushes
his way through the crowd again, puts his goggles on,
fires the drill, and begins to drill through the lock.
Parker and Ballard see what Will is doing and rush out
of their office.
BALLARD
Will, what are you doing?
Will stops the drill, steps back from the door, as it
swings open and the costumed actors rush in to change.
PARKER
Well Mr. Cooper, good work. You got
the door open.
Will glances over at Ellen who looks back at him,
impressed.
WILL
No problem.
PARKER
Well actually there is a slight
problem.
WILL
What's that?
PARKER
You got the door open, when Ms.
Ballard and I could not, that's
true, but in the process, you
destroyed school property. I'll
see you in Shop class after school
for the rest of this month. You and
Mr. McDaniel will be able to compare
your drill wounds while you build a
new door for the theater department.
(he walks into
the dressing room)
Good rehearsal everybody!
Will looks over to Ellen again who is still smiling at
him.
CUT TO:
INT. LUNCHROOM - EVENING (HOURS LATER)
The gang (minus Brian) is all sitting around their table eating
meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green beans and rolls. A
banner hanging over them read: "AFTER SCHOOL DINNER
VOUCHER PROGRAM" Reicther barely takes a breath from
shoveling food into his mouth. Will is trying to use the
fork, but finds it difficult because of his bandaged
hand.
CHRIS
So then I ended up going crazy and
kicked over a trash can.
BROCK
And she didn't find out that you
were the one that gave her the
pills?
CHRIS
Nope.
JOEL
(off food)
God this is so much better then
dinner at home. Brian's missing
out.
CASEY
Where is Brian?
BROCK
Well, he was fine when he got out
of the hosipital but he decided to
milk this thing for all it's worth.
So he told the school that he has
some "emotional" problems to work
out before he can come back. When
really he's just playing video
games all day.
Some laughter.
Will is having trouble eating with his hand still all
bandaged up. He spills some of his potatoes on the floor.
WILL
Shit.
JOEL
Good job, Will.
Will tires to give him the finger, but his hand is so
tightly bandaged, that he is unable to do it.
JOEL (CONT'D)
The price you pay for a little T & A.
CASEY
Good thing you weren't using a saw,
you might have chopped your hand
off and then, well, been very
frustrated for the rest of your
life.
They all laugh. Reicther finally surfaces for air from
his plate, looking satisfied.
REICTHER
Meatloaf.
CUT TO:
EXT. VANDELE HOME - NIGHT
Stacy is sitting alone underneath a large tree in the
backyard. She looks up at the stars, thinking, when she
hears footsteps coming towards her.
She looks around and sees Marilyn walking slowly towards
her.
MARILYN
Hey.
STACY
Hi.
Marilyn walks up and sits down next to Stacy.
MARILYN
Nice night.
STACY
A bit cold though.
Pause.
MARILYN
I want you to know, my offer still
stands. I want you to go with me.
Pause.
STACY
...I can't.
MARILYN
But, it's perfect. You're packing
to move away anyway. Just put your
stuff in my car and we can he the
hell out of here in 10 minutes.
STACY
I...I just can't.
MARILYN
But you're leaving anyway.
STACY
I'm going college. Chicago, it's
too far away.
MARILYN
But, that wouldn't matter, we'd be
together.
STACY
Marilyn...no.
Marilyn looks away from her, Stacy stares into the sky.
MARILYN
I love you Stacy.
Marilyn gets up and walks back to her car and drives
off. Stacy keeps staring at the sky. Tears begins to
fall.
We PAN UP and focus on the stars before we:
FADE OUT.
(Song continues over credits)
END OF EPISODE
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