Turn Me On Dead Man (pdf format) David Clarke Lambertson

Three band mates cover up the death of their famous bassist.

When someone asks you to name an urban legend, Bigfoot might come to mind. If not that hairy beast, then perhaps Bloody Mary. Or that creepy stalker guy – with a steel hook for a hand. One that probably won’t occur to you is “Billy Shears.” But if that name doesn’t ring a bell, don’t worry. Your mother would know. ‘Cause she was born a long, long time ago…

Based off the legend of a world famous doppelganger, Turn Me On Dead Man tells a tale of a man plucked from obscurity and transformed into a music icon.

With a little help from his friends.

Those of you old enough to have once been called “hippies” are probably catching on right about now.

Imagine – a tongue-in-cheek retelling of the infamous “Paul is dead” hoax.

That is, unless it’s really true…

The script opens after Paul McCartney’s fatal car accident. A stunned John, George and Ringo come together to conspire – hatching a plot to replace their friend with a look-alike, and keep the Beatles’ dream alive. As luck would have it, they discover a dead ringer. The one and only Billy Shears.

But can Billy and the lads Fool the World? Or will the band inevitably leave a trail of musical crumbs that point their loyal fans towards the truth?

A fab mixture of folklore and fantasy, Turn Me On Dead Man is chock full of enough jokes to fill Albert Hall. See if you can spot all the Beatle lyrics hidden in the dialogue… beginning with the title, all the way to the horrifying end.

And if you don’t know what we’re talking about by now? Get thee to Pandora. Immediately!

Pages: 8

Budget: Moderate. Locations include a recording studio and a concert backstage area. Costumes require Beatle suits and wigs. If you’re lucky, you might even convince Ringo to play himself. All he has to do is act naturally.

About the writer: David Clarke Lambertson took up writing rather late in life having already been retired before he put pen to paper (okay – finger to computer key) for the first time. His favorite genres to read and write are dramedies and romantic comedies. He has written three features; The Last Statesman (a Nicholl’s and BlueCat quarterfinalist), The Beginning of The End and The End (a Nicholl’s quarterfinalist and PAGE Awards semi-finalist) and has recently completed a new comedy – Screw You Tube.

About the reviewer: David M Troop resumed writing in 2011 after a twenty-five year hiatus. Since then, he has written about 50 short scripts, two of which have been produced. Dave would like to make it three. He is a regular, award-winning contributor to MoviePoet.com. Born on the mean streets of Reading, PA, Dave now resides in Schuylkill Haven with his wife Jodi and their two lazy dogs Max and Mattie. He can be reached at dtroop506 “AT” Gmail.

Read Turn Me On Dead Man (pdf format)

Find more scripts available for production

This screenplay may not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.

How To Pronounce Hawaiian (pdf format) by Sylvia Dahlby

“A gold-digger makes a friendly wager with her sugar daddy.”

Short and sweet. Less is more. Keep It Simple, Silly (KISS.) In the screenwriting world of character arcs and complex premises, a short and funny story can often be a breath of pure, fresh air…

As it is with Sylvia Dahlby’s efficient two-pager, How to Pronounce Hawaiian. As the script opens, 56 year old Rich and his much young girlfriend Tiffany sit in a convertible, parked in a fast food drive-thru lane. They’re in Hawaii. Somewhere. As Tiffany scours the map, she wonders aloud why Rich grab his trusty GPS. But Rich insists they aren’t lost. On the contrary – he knows exactly where they are. Kealakekua.

Say what?

The word doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue. As the argument deepens, Rich and Tiffany take turns pronouncing the city’s name – each with their own garbled spin. Which inspires Tiffany to offer a small wager. Retrieving a magazine, she flips to a picture of a pearl necklace. If her pronunciation proves correct, Rich will buy the jewelry for her. If his is accurate? Tiffany whispers the offer in his ear. She’ll… well, you know. (Readers – keep those innuendos to yourself, please!)

And with that, the bet is on.

So, how will it end? Far be it from us to spoil the surprise…

Looking for a snappy punchline that’s easy to film? HTPH is your ticket. It’s guaranteed to make you (and your audience) smile. Not to mention attempt to say “Kealakekua” yourself. And Googling “Don Ho.” Say who? We won’t tell.

Pages: 2

Budget: Low, unless you fly to Hawaii and film the fast-food restaurant exterior there. (No little grass shack required.) Three characters round out this story set in paradise. Aloha. 🙂

About the Writer Sylvia Dahlby: I’m a one time advertising copywriter who has fallen in love with screenwriting. I’ve written a handful of features, one has been produced as a Role Playing Game (RPG) and made its debut at CarnageCon. I enjoy writing short scripts since it’s a fun exercise for sharpening my skills; so far one of my shorts has been produced as a student film project, and I welcome the opportunity to have more of my work produced via participation on SimplyScripts. Sylvia can be reached at sylviedahl (a) AOL.

About the Reviewer: California über reader/reviewer KP Mackie is working hard on her animated feature.

Read How To Pronounce Hawaiian (pdf format)

Find more scripts available for production

This screenplay may not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.

Waterfall (pdf format) by Marnie Mitchell

A couple’s constant arguing during a marathon has dire consequences.

Where do story ideas come from? Everywhere. A “what if” idea, a haunting song, a passing image in a mirror. Fleeting memories from childhood… When you’re a writer, everything is game. All you need is a fun idea, and a unique twist to make it fresh…

The inspiration for Waterfall comes from a bit of Americana we all share (and no, STS ain’t gonna tell.) That, and an element most of us can relate to: petty fighting and relationships.

…a couple struggle up a hillside; the last two in a long line. It’s a Warrior Dash type marathon, and neither one is doing well. On top of that, they’re bickering – the barbs getting more heated with every step. She’s thirsty. He dropped their water bottle and broke it. And now he’s slowing them both down. It’s her negative attitude, he replies. He’s tired of the constant bitching…

The fighting escalates to fever pitch. Then, finally, something gives.

A rock – under her feet. Plunging them both into peril. Especially when he loses his footing as well….

Is Waterfall a survivalist drama? Not exactly. More like a tongue in cheek homage. Once the situation escalates, the inspiration comes clear – driven home by the final line before Fade Out.

If you’re a director that enjoys puns in visual form, Waterfall’s likely to be your cup of tea – a twinkling star of a comedy sketch, bringing a smile to the face of jaded readers…

Pages: 3

Budget: Minimal. Locate a hill, and a fit couple willing to do some physical activity. Not a monumental challenge.

About the Writer: An award winning writer AND photographer, Marnie Mitchell’s website is available at BrainFluffs.com. Marnie’s had 5 shorts produced (so far) and placed Semi-final with her features in BlueCat. Marnie can be contacted via her website.

About the reviewer: California uber reader/reviewer KP Mackie is working hard on her animated feature and maybe an update to her bio?

Read Waterfall (PDF format)

Find more scripts available for production

This screenplay may not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.

’Til Death (pdf format) by Rick Hansberry

A marital tiff erupts to epic proportions…

Married couples can find s-o-o-o many things to bicker about. Toilet seat up, toilet seat down, stop hogging the covers, I-don’t-like-the-panties-drying-on-the-rod*. You know, that sort of thing.

For Paul and Jenna, it’s the fancy towels — specifically, how could Paul have had the audacity to actually use them, when he knows damn well they were Jenna’s favorite wedding gift!

In this wildly humorous short, award winning screenwriter Rick Hansberry zeroes in on just how crazy domestic skirmishes can get. As the battle lines in this tale are drawn, Paul and Jenna find every possible way to push each others’ buttons: power tools, flushing the toilet while the shower’s being used, and multiple viewings of Sex and the City (oh, the Humanity!) Reminiscent of Woody Allen or Neil Simon, the snarky, quick witted dialogue escalates to def-con four quickly. It begins with a raging thunderstorm – and ends with a wild-west shootout. Including cleavage. And power tools.

A sneering, jeering bundle of fun, ‘Til Death is totally character driven, and super simple to produce. Did we mention relatable? Well, for some of us it is… 🙂

Pages: 5

Budget: Micro.

About the writer: Rick Hansberry has written/produced several short films, including the SAG Foundation award-winning Branches. He teaches screenwriting seminars and workshops in the Central Pennsylvania area and is presently available for hire for new story ideas, rewrites and adaptations. He can be reached at djrickhansberry – AT – msn, (cell phone 717-682-8618). IMDB credits.

About the reviewers: Scott & Paula Merrow are a husband and wife screenwriting team. Since 2006, they’ve written over 50 short screenplays, several of which have been produced. They tend toward family-friendly scripts, but they’ve written a little bit of everything: horror, fantasy, sci-fi, comedy,… the whole nine yards. They’re reachable at scott-paula “AT” comcast.net

* Especially during that time of month, when my friends are coming over for the game.

Read ‘Til Death (pdf format)

Find other scipts available for production

This screenplay may not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.

“Hold Your Breath”

An aspiring producer creates a unique way to deliver his pitch.

“Sell your story, sell yourself. Be creative, be brief.” And above all, be unique.

Ahhh, crafting an effective pitch. Ever hear about the writer who sent his shoe and a note — “To meet the talented one-shoe writer…” — with his contact information? How about the scribe who arrived with buckets of chicken for producers, only to ask them to supply the napkins? Or, the guy who handed the exec a softball — an actual ball — and declared, “Here’s my ‘soft pitch’ of an idea.”

Going up?

In the short, “Hold Your Breath, prolific writer Rick Hansberry flips the proverbial elevator pitch right on its head. As the story opens, aspiring reality-show creator Jason (24) corners a senior producer in the elevator. The fast-talking kid manipulates his way into the exec’s office, and drops the name of the producer’s boss — network chairman “Don” — who Jason claims is family friend, “Uncle Don.”    

Security is summoned, and Jason threatened with arrest. Does the name-dropping fly? Armed with only 30 seconds and charm, will Jason propel his reality-show concept all the way to the top? And what is this breath-stopping concept anyway? Let’s just say, the story’s surprise employs a trick that’s one for the books…

“HYB” is a clever and fun comedy riff, delivering a creative spin to the traditional elevator pitch that we’re all so painfully familiar with. The doors are wide open — come on in!

About the writer: Rick Hansberry has written/produced several short films, including the SAG Foundation award-winning “Branches.” His first feature is set to be released in the summer of 2014. Trailer available here . He teaches screenwriting seminars and workshops in the Central Pennsylvania area and is presently available for hire for new story ideas, rewrites and adaptations. He can be reached at djrickhansberry – AT – msn, (cell phone 717-682-8618) and IMDB credits available here.

Page Count: 5

Budget: Low. Quick shots inside an elevator, a producer’s “office”, a cast of three, plus a couple extras to portray security guards. Plenty of elbow room.

About the guest reviewer for “Hold Your Breath”: California uber reader/reviewer KP Mackie is working hard on another animated feature. Maybe John Lasseter’s in the elevator Rick envisioned for his story? Hey, um, Rick? –

READ THE SCRIPT HERE – AND DON’T FORGET TO COMMENT!!

FOR YET MORE SCRIPTS AVAILABLE FOR PRODUCTION:

PLEASE SEARCH SIMPLYSCRIPTS.COM

OR THE BLOG VERSION OF STS HERE.

All screenplays are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. The screenplays may not be used without the expressed written permission of the author.

Dick Jokes
A stand up comedian discusses the male sex and their urges,
whilst going through a very personal journey.

Who wants to hear a dick joke? Well, nobody in the aptly named script Dick Jokes, by Cameron Grey.

But settle into your seats, folks. You’re going to hear a good one anyway.

As the script opens, standup comedian Redmond is just warming up his routine. Standing on stage at a Baltimore comedy club, he opens well-enough – gets a few laughs and dodges one heckler with ease.

But then Redmond runs into trouble. And one particular line falls flat: “I’ve come all the way from NYC to talk to you about dicks.”

Record scratch.

One female audience member gets up to leave. Redmond stops her, begging her to hear the joke before judging. Her response: he has two minutes to make her laugh or she’s gone. Unwilling to fold, Redmond accepts the challenge and begins telling his tale.

As Redmond digs deeper into his “bit”, we cut to flashbacks of Redmond’s life offstage. What led him to the comedy club tonight – and why is he obsessed about… well, Dicks?

Funny and smart, with a surprisingly grown-up message, Dick Jokes will have you in tears, both from laughter and being genuinely touched. (No, not that kind of touched, perverts!)

Trust us, any script that blends comedic timing with real emotion is special. Especially when dick jokes is the focus!

Believe it or not, this one’s safe for work. And great for festivals, as well!

Pages: 10

Budget: Low to medium. A few actors, several settings and a few costume changes, but if you know of a community theatre nearby, you should have everything you need to tell your own dick joke that’ll slay them in the aisles.

About the reviewer: Mitch Smith is an award winning screenwriter whose website (http://mitchsmithscripts.wix.com/scripts offers notes, script editing and phone consultations. You can also reach him at Mitch.SmithScripts@gmail.com and follow Mitch at https://twitter.com/MitchScripts.

About the writer: I’m a Scottish/Australian writer. Despite being in proud possession of an Ancient Studies degree, somehow I’ve ended up working in architecture, largely doing3d visualisation and project coordination. Not sure how that happened but it pays the bills!

I initially took to writing scripts as some kind of therapy, a release from the pressures of the construction industry and family life. Now I’ve got into screen writing, work and family life is a breeze but looking for the next idea is a stress. Life’s a bit odd…

My first efforts were in drama, but to my surprise comedy seems to be clicking for myself. Interested in Dick Jokes? (And who isn’t?) Then contact me at cammygray1983 “AT” gmail.com

READ THE SCRIPT HERE – AND DON’T FORGET TO COMMENT!!

FOR YET MORE SCRIPTS AVAILABLE FOR PRODUCTION:

PLEASE SEARCH SIMPLYSCRIPTS.COM 

OR THE BLOG VERSION OF STS HERE.

All screenplays are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. 

The screenplays may not be used without the expressed written permission of the author.

 The Mating Dance

When it comes to romance, listening to advice can lead to unexpected results…

Ah – the love story. Nowadays, almost every movie has one. Even genre movies throw in a handful of romance. Milk, Iron Man, The Wolf of Wall Street. Even the animated hit Frozen gets in its share of kissy-cuddly action. It’s almost a required sub-plot B.

For the romantic-comedy, of course, relationships take center stage. Two people “meet-cute.” Life throws obstacles in their way – simultaneously tearing them apart, yet bonding them subtly closer. Just as they realize they’re meant for each other, a misunderstanding causes a tragic break up. Ultimately, the couple reconcile and kiss. The curtain falls. The last scene fades.

Yep, getting to “Happily Ever After” requires some choreographed steps. But even if you’ve heard this song before, doesn’t mean you’ve seen the latest moves.

In her short The Mating Dance, talented writer Marnie Mitchell-Lister puts a fun, original spin on that never-ending ballad of romance…

Separate guests at the Hilton, singles Jake and Marla literally bump into each other at the reservation desk. Their bags become entangled, resulting in several clumsy “dance steps”. When they finally break free, an embarrassed Jake heads for the hotel lounge. Sure, Marla’s cute and all. But Jake’s recently divorced. It’s been awhile since he’s been in the game. To kill time before his flight, Jake impulse-buys a book at the convenience stand: The Mating Dance for Men, by Ramesh Kumar. May as well read up on the latest tips…

After signing out, Marla also stops by the stand. And a book catches her eye. The Mating Dance for Women, by Dr. Padima Sanghi-Kumar. She grabs it, making sure no-one sees… and settles in to read as well.

We all know what comes next. The couples’ eyes meet. Then an awkward pause – mutual attraction in the air. Soon, the Mating Dance begins in earnest. Awkward introductions. Stammered “lines”. The two stumble toward Getting to Know Each Other, aided by contradictory advice from their hidden books. Yep, Jake and Marla could use some guidance. But will they find their rhythm, or drive each other away?

Like the best romance comedies, TMD doesn’t take itself too seriously: alternating “voice-overs” from the books with awkward dialogue between the couple. (Anyone who’s been through a bad first date knows exactly what that’s like.) You’ll be rooting for Jake and Marla instantly. And you’ll want to read this to the end. Because happily-ever-after doesn’t happen when a couple meets. It always clicks at the end.

Comedy indie directors take note… This is one script worth choosing as your dance partner. A fun premise, and easy to film, it won’t be single for too long!

About the writer: Having completed 9 features and over 70 shorts, Marnie Mitchell-Lister has no plans on stopping. Currently, she’s working on a variety of projects; an animated feature, a psychological thriller and a TV pilot about a bored housewife whose quest for excitement gets her in all sorts of trouble. Some of Marnie’s work can be found on her website: http://www.brainfluffs.com.

Pages: 6

Budget: Three simple interiors: a hotel lobby, the hotel lounge, and a shuttle. Two main characters, a couple extras, and two actors with distinctive voices to provide voiceover dialogue, preferably with catchy accents.

About the reviewer: California uber reader/reviewer KP Mackie is working hard on her animated feature. KP’s work is available at moviepoet.com!

READ THE SCRIPT HERE – AND DON’T FORGET TO COMMENT!!

FOR YET MORE SCRIPTS AVAILABLE FOR PRODUCTION:

PLEASE SEARCH SIMPLYSCRIPTS.COM 

OR THE BLOG VERSION OF STS HERE.

All screenplays are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved.

The screenplays may not be used without the expressed written permission of the author.

Warmer
A curious toy designer picks a poor time to put his latest creation to the test

Dolls. Made as innocent friends to play with imaginary children, the typical fictional doll trope subverts this by adding a sinister, often fatal side to them. From Child’s Play to the evil Krusty in The Simpsons, dolls in fiction invariably are associated with horror.

However, there’s no “horror” in Steve Miles’ Warmer, at least from the audience’s perspective. There are no rogue dolls – just Heidi and Abby, twin blonde and brunette Barbiesque inventions by high-flying toy developer Chuck Dunker. Optimistic about his latest prototype(s), he’s ready to pitch them to the CEO of Morton’s Toys.

But just before the crucial dinner/demonstration, disaster strikes. An “accident” leads to Heidi’s head disappearing. Even worse, Heidi and Abby are an interactive hide and seek playing duo – without one, both are useless!

So the dinner/demonstration turns into dinner/description, without Heidi’s presence. Even so, when the daughter of Morton’s CEO brings out an Abby prototype and turns it on, Chuck starts acting awkwardly. Why?

Because Abby’s quest to find Heidi appears to be focused on Chuck – she won’t take her eyes off him!

Worse still, when Abby gets closer to Chuck, Heidi’s silence is broken, very much to Chuck’s discomfort…

HEIDI DOLL (O.S.)
(muffled)
You’re getting warmer!

Where’s Heidi hiding? And why is Chuck so anxious? Read the script and find out – the reveal of Heidi’s hiding place will warm up even the coldest of hearts in amusement!

Pages: 9

Budget: Moderate. Though you know – getting attractive dolls is key!

About the reviewer: Hamish Porter is a writer who, if he was granted one wish, would ask for the skill of being able to write dialogue like Tarantino. Or maybe the ability to teleport. Nah, that’s nothing compared to the former. A lover of philosophy, he’s working on several shorts and a sporting comedy that can only be described as “quintessentially British”. If you want to contact him, he can be emailed: hamishdonaldp “AT” gmail.com. If you’d like to contact him and be subjected to incoherent ramblings, follow him on Twitter @HamishP95.

About the writer: Steve Miles decided to get serious about writing around three years ago. Since then he’s concentrated on putting together a collection of shorts with a goal of finishing up a feature or two by year-end. Oh, and giving George RR Martin a run for his money! Email him at stevemiles80 “AT” yahoo.co.uk

READ THE SCRIPT HERE (AND DON’T FORGET TO COMMENT!)

FOR YET MORE SCRIPTS AVAILABLE FOR PRODUCTION:

PLEASE SEARCH SIMPLYSCRIPTS.COM 

OR THE BLOG VERSION OF STS HERE.

All screenplays are copyrighted to their respective authors. All rights reserved. The screenplays may not be used without the expressed written permission of the author.

Dog Years
The barrier guards at the Large Hadron Collider make a strange discovery that makes them stop and wonder… just for a moment.

I never understood the whole “take your dog shopping with you” thing. Especially since most stores and restaurants don’t allow pets inside. (What’s wrong with places like that, anyway? The presence of dogs makes everything better, you ask me.)

“Hey, Sparky, let me take you from the comfy air conditioned house and lock you inside the sweltering Ford death box. That way, you can watch me eat a foot long tuna sub through the window at Subway. Doesn’t that sound like lotsa fun?”

In fact, whenever I see a dog alone in a parked car, I prefer to imagine he had an argument with his owner, stole the keys, and drove himself there. Maybe he gnawed on a bone until it calmed him down, then drove back home to wag his tail and apologize.

Highly doubtful, I realize, but it makes me feel better than the alternative.

By now, you’re probably wondering how this all ties in with the new short script Dog Years, by super scribe Anthony Cawood.

It does. Trust me. Because maybe there are MORE explanations for such things than meets the eye.

Pascal and Antoine are two security guards at the Hadron Collider, who stumble upon a dog locked inside a car. Pascal thinks it’s weird the car’s been there all day, but Antoine dismisses it as “just someone’s pet.”

Pascal just might let it go at that, if it weren’t for “the sign.” Attached to the dog’s collar, it actually reads FROM THE FUTURE. Explain that one, smart guy.

Still, Antoine blows it off as a practical joke. Or maybe it’s one of those hidden camera reality shows. Still – ultimately – it’s just a dog.

So a defeated Pascal mopes back to the guard’s station.

I won’t expose the ending, but what happens next is a bit – extreme.

A fun quirky script, Dog Years will make you chuckle (and think twice) the next time you see a poodle sitting behind the wheel of that rusty mini van in the Walmart parking lot.

Comedy directors – especially those with a fondness of dogs (and security guards) – should scoot across the lawn, and lap this script up. Quickly!

Pages: 4

Budget: Low. A small cast of only three, and one of them will literally work for kibble. As for the Hadron Collider?  Stock footage can be subbed in. Or just another sign!

Disclaimer: The reviewer wishes to express that no animals were harmed during the writing of this review.

About the Reviewer: David M Troop has been writing since he could hold a No. 2 pencil. His short scripts have been featured on MoviePoet.com, Simplyscripts, and this here one. Currently, Dave is writing this review, but plans to write feature films in the near future and take Hollywood by storm. Well, not really storm – more like a sprinkle. He lives in the comatose town of Schuylkill Haven, PA where he is a proud grandfather, a father of two, and a husband of one.

About the Writer, Anthony Cawood: I’m an award winning screenwriter from the UK with over 15 scripts produced, optioned and/or purchased. Outside of my screenwriting career, I’m also a published short story writer and movie reviewer. Links to my films and details of my scripts can be found at www.anthonycawood.co.uk.

Read Dog Years

Find more scripts available for production

This screenplay may not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.