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Thursday, January 18, 2024

Devil’s Due - post author L. Chambers
Devil’s Due
(8 page western/horror short)
A gambler’s plan to rob a preacher meets unexpected resistance.

Okay, saddle up folks, and hang onto your hats cause you’re in for a wild ride with today’s script review of a Western-themed Horror/Thriller, bound to be a crowd-pleaser and have you on the edge of your seats.

Modern-day Westerns or Neo-Westerns have enjoyed a resurgence of late and that’s in large part due to their versatility in being able to successfully combine genres. You only need look at The Power of the Dog, Brokeback Mountain, Rango, Bone Tomahawk, and The Ballad of Buster Scruggs. The list goes on, and this is before we even touch on the popularity of television series like Yellowstone, and videogames such as Red Dead Redemption.

Western-themed Short scripts, however, are noticeably thin on the ground so I’m delighted to showcase Paul Knauer’s mini masterpiece of entertainment and whodunnit: Devil’s Due.

We fade in on –

INT. SALOON – DAY
A two-story den of iniquity. GUNFIGHTERS drink. The BARTENDER serves.
A PIANO PLAYER tickles the ivories.

We are summarily introduced to our hero of the piece, WALT. At least we think he’s the good guy. Only time will tell…

Walt is crusty and dusty – And enjoying that favourite old-west pastime of gambling.

Poker is his game and so far he’s doing very nicely thank you. That is until a man of the cloth enters this fine establishment and disturbs the ambience.

A PREACHER, 62, shuffles into the room, his collar more dirt brown than white.

The room falls SILENT.

The Preacher moves first to the bar, holds out a large burlap sack, already heavy with coins.

PREACHER
The treacherous and the lecherous
shall go to hell, ‘less they be saved first.

Now, I don’t know about you but in my neck of the woods first impressions count for a lot and spouting fire and brimstone is definitely not going engender generosity nor win you any popularity contests.
Walt feels the same way; most certainly not taking kindly to this stranger taking his hard earned, or at least
hard-won cash.

The preacher moves down the line soliciting donations from the bar patrons. When he reaches Walt’s table —

The GAMBLERS toss coins from their stacks–all, except Walt.

Walt, eyes straight ahead, tosses two cards onto the table.

WALT
I’ll take two.

You could cut the tension with a knife.

None of the Gamblers move. Not even the DEALER.

The Preacher reaches for a large stack of Walt’s coins–one of many.
But, Walt intercepts him, slamming his hand on top of the Preacher’s.

Now Walt’s not into courtin’ trouble so he scares up one single coin, tosses it into the bag.

But the Preacher is not happy.

He leans in, whispers to Walt…

PREACHER
There are them that give, them that
take. But, the devil always gets his due.

Sounds like a thinly veiled threat to me.

Preacher takes the bag of money, slinks off upstairs with his spoils.

Now if that wasn’t enough to put Walt off his game, two good ol’ boys burst into the saloon shortly thereafter and attempt to operate a little sting of their own.

DIRK, 32, his face as twisted as his teeth, and MARVIN, 33, prettier
than Dirk, but only because his hat rides so low.

You can tell just by looking at these two that they’re trouble with a capital T, and likely not pulling a full wagon – if you get my drift. They’re perfect for what Walt has in mind, however. After a quick round of poker in which Walt cunningly lets them think they got one over him, things are about to take a turn. Walt’s got bigger fish to fry than a lil ol’ card game and he’s about to make them an offer they can’t refuse.

WALT
There’s a preacher. New in town. Comes in
every day, converts the town’s guilt into money.
It’s a shakedown. Plain and simple. But, it’s a
good one. Very lucrative. I need you boys to
help me steal that big bag of shame he carries.

We split it three ways. You up for it?

They nod.

Hmm, a simple plan. Whatever could go wrong?

Sure enough as soon as Walt’s out of earshot, the boys decide splitting a bag of money down the middle sounds a whole lot better than divvying it up into thirds.

Ever heard of the saying: Never con a conman?

Okay, I’m not going to spill the beans on the rest of the plot, except to say that what follows is a doozy of a story that follows in the tradition of Fargo and No Country for Old Men. Writer Paul Knauer weaves a tangled web of lies, deceit, and double-cross with Devil’s Due, punctuating the narrative with eccentric characters, some lovely comedy touches, and a plot that delivers not one twist, but two.

Overall, what we have here is some darn tootin’ fine storytelling on our hands.

Word to the wise: You want to burn the breeze on this one cause there’s sure to be a stampede. Best get a wriggle on. No hedging your bets, just go all in and reap the rewards.

Read the Script and talk about it on the Discussion Board

Devil’s Due took out first place Writer’s Choice in the Simply Scripts August OWC, with the theme of Fever Dream.

https://www.simplyscripts.net/cgi-bin/Blah/Blah.pl?c-OWC/

About the Writer: Paul Knauer is a produced screenwriter with two features in early development. His main focus is thrillers and slightly absurdist comedy with heart. But, Paul believes becoming a better writer requires pushing personal boundaries, so you’ll notice a thorough mix of genres in his portfolio. Much of his work has universal appeal, evidenced by successful productions in the UK, UAE, and US–and options in Australia, Russia, India, Canada, and Thailand. A recent feature of his was named a 2022 Nicholl Fellowship Quarterfinalist.

About the Reviewer: L.Chambers has been writing all her life – especially in her head, and on scraps of paper. It’s only in the last few years she began to get serious about screen-writing. Prior to this she worked in the Features Department for ABC TV as a Program Assistant, and trained as a FAD. She currently works as a freelance web-content editor and lives with her husband (also a screenwriter) in Sydney, Australia. L. Chambers can be reached at: libbych (a) hotmail.

Production Notes: Talented adult character actors and a few extras are needed for this one. Mostly interior scenes; someone who has a knack for set-dressing to recreate the wild west flavour. A creative director could easily implement a few workarounds to provide for the exterior scenes and the brief scene of actor on horseback. Minor SFX to provide additional ‘magic’. Alternatively, this is the perfect vehicle for you to show off your talents via classic 2D animation or photo real 3D, or if the writer allows to collaborate on graphic comic/novelisation of the project, and submit to sites such as hyperepics.com/

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