Over on the Unproduced Scripts page are fifteen original works for your reading pleasure.

– Don

Over on the TV Scripts and Teleplays Page is the pilot script for Poker Face.

Thanks Matthew for the heads up!

– Don

SILVERFISH

A simple pest problem spirals out of control.

Burn After Reading, Intermission, In Bruge, Fargo, Very Bad Things, Go, American Beauty, and the list goes on… There’s one thing these movies all have in common and that is that their narratives all feature strong elements of tragedy and very dark comedy.

Combining gallows humour with just the right amount of laugh out loud comedy and having an audience buy the blend of both is no easy task. Scenes and taboo subject matter that makes us not know whether to laugh or cry or gasp in horror or cover our eyes can be hard to watch. Tim Wolfe’s Silverfish captures this essence of Black Comedy perfectly, with the addition of also having a very clever plot.

We open on an everyday situation and an everyday bloke. At least that’s what we first think. We are introduced to Blaine Babbitt, described as –

A ‘normal enough looking dude’ in his late thirties.

The thing is, what Blaine is about to do is far from normal –

… In Blaine’s living room a silverfish crawls along the wall.

A red dot appears on its back. Blaine tracks it for a few feet, then…

BLAM!

A puff of plaster bursts into the air.

I don’t know about you but when I’m faced with creepy-crawlies I usually reach for a fly-swatter or a can of bug-spray. Blaine however, has an entirely unique and extreme method of extermination which involves shooting that pesky silverfish with a 9mm pistol.  And if that weren’t enough first equipping said pistol with an infrared laser. Talk about overkill.

What Blaine’s about to discover next though will make your hair curl. Turns out he’s just blown a hole in the living room wall and the bullet has gone straight into the bedroom wall behind it.

Did I mention Blaine’s fifteen-year-old son is home?

Upon realising the potential gravity of the situation –

Blaine staggers to the first door on the left, slowly twists the knob and enters…

Holy shit. Whatever he just saw made his blood run cold.

Did I also mention that Blaine’s wife has chosen this exact time to call?

Oh, and that a neighbour has just turned up because he’s terrified he heard a gunshot?

It’s no spoiler to reveal these details by the way, because where this tale is going and the chain of events that little silverfish has set off, well, suffice to say this is only the tip of the iceberg. Blaine’s about to discover that if he thinks things are bad now, they’re only going to get a hell of a lot worse.

The mark of an exceptionally talented writer is in giving us the unexpected, in subverting our expectations, and in entertaining us thoroughly along the way. With its blend of horror, crime-thriller, tragedy, and comedy of errors, Silverfish is quite simply rollickingly good entertainment. Every time I thought, oh no, that won’t work, or I thought I knew where the story was headed the writer surprised me with something else. The twists and turns of the plot, the characters, the humour, the seamless dialogue – wow!

As a final selling point regarding its broad appeal, I’m going to borrow a fellow writer’s feedback who (after reading Silverfish) posted this. Bear in mind her favourite genre is Romantic Comedy.

… From page one, I could not stop reading… It is well written, engaging and I could not stop laughing (even at the “sick” parts and even though it got a little grim)… This is obviously the work of an experienced screenwriter … It really is golden. I’m still “clutching my pearls” at some of the content but still able to give a definite thumbs up for this script.

Sincerely, Cringing but still Laughing (aka Kathy)

I’m betting this one’s going to be in hot demand. No need to hold a gun over anyone’s head; a few words of admiration via email will do, but my prediction is if you want to hear the words Crowd-pleaser and Award-Winning in the same sentence, you’d best not dilly-dally and get this one in the can.

Production notes:

Budget: Medium to Crowdfunding, but well worth the effort to put you on the map.
Locations: Predominantly a House. Hospital, Car, Drive Through Restaurant. Locations can be improvised/adapted. Minimal SFX.
Talent: Talented Adult Actors with a gift for drama & comedy.

Read the Script (30 page short, dark comedy in pdf format) and talk about it on the Discussion Board

About the Writer Tim Wolfe is an award winning screenwriter and stand-up comedian who has completed a dozen feature length specs. One of those, a murder mystery called “Dalton,” was optioned after placing as a finalist in the 2018 Big Break Contest.

Most recently, his short film “Googly” took home five awards at Cleveland’s 2023 48 Hour Film Festival, including “Best Laugh Out Loud Film.”

Tim is seeking representation so he can stop telling jokes to drunk people throughout the Midwest. Tim can be reach at: TimWolfe2427 (at) gmail.

About the Reviewer: L.Chambers has been writing all her life – especially in her head, and on scraps of paper. It’s only in the last few years she began to get serious about screen-writing. Prior to this she worked in the Features Department for ABC TV as a Program Assistant, and trained as a FAD. She currently works as a freelance web-content editor and lives with her husband (also a screenwriter) in Sydney, Australia.

*This is not in the public domain. You must reach out to the screenwriter for permission to film.

Over on the Unproduced Scripts are the scripts of the August One Week Challenge.

– Don

Over on the Unproduced Scripts page are the entries for the August ’23 “Fever Dream” One Week Challenge.

– Don

p.s. if anyone is interested in acquiring the scripts, please reach out to me for contact info or wait until next week when the writers are revealed.

– Don

Over on the Unproduced Scripts page are seven original works for your reading pleasure.

And the August One Week Challenge has begun! Check out the theme: Fever Dream and sharpen your pencils.

– Don

In the world of screenwriting a good opening scene is imperative in grabbing the reader’s attention. It sets tone and atmosphere and is crucial in enticing us to turn the pages.

L.P. Lapierre’s psychological horror New Arrival (6 page short horor in pdf format) kicks off instantly with a very simple OVER BLACK scene, but it’s the horrific overlaid sounds of –

Screeching tires, glass and metal… and a chorus of screams…

– that immediately draws us in.

Over black scenes are used to great dramatic effect in many well revered movies: The classic 60s horror film The Innocents comes to mind featuring the eerie sound of a young girl’s mournful song, Zero Dark Thirty brings back nightmares via harrowing real-life recordings of that fateful day on September 11, Kenneth Branagh’s distress call in Infinity War calls to us from deep space, and Kill Bill Volume 1 features no other sound at the start but the Bride’s labored breathing.

Openings like these that ‘keep us in the dark’ are all the more effective because we’re going in blind but our other senses are heightened, thus conjuring our imagination to fill in the blanks.

A picture may indeed paint a thousand words but some familiar sounds can act as a gut-punch in evoking a nightmare response.

When we do FADE IN on New Arrival it is to –

A BASEMENT

It’s the middle of the day.  Six people are seated around a table, with one empty chair.

One empty chair reserved for –

a clearly distraught Bobby Stranhiem, a young man in his late 20s.

He’s ushered in by an ominous character who goes only by the name of The Caretaker.

The Caretaker circles Bobby and stops behind him.

In what appears to be a soothing gesture – He places his hands on his shoulders

And proceeds to introduce Bobby to members of a support group.

They’re a ragtag group this lot, and strangely attired. SANDY HARRISON, a nineteen year old cheer-leader who looks as though she just bounced in from a pep-rally – Sitting next to her : Forty-year old GEORGE CLEVELAND, very much the spit of a 1930’s gangster – and DWAYNE HOLLY a fifty-year old farmer who looks as if he just stepped straight from that very well known painting, American Gothic.

I’m already on edge and wondering what fate has befallen poor Bobby, and that’s before – The Caretaker addresses the group –

Okay, that’s standard greeting for a support group but something about this whole set-up is very creepy. On first appearance it appears like a benign coming together of like-minded people following a traumatic event, but this scene carries with it an added feeling of dread. As the Caretaker acknowledges Bobby’s suffering, (presumably in the aftermath of the opening scene), he then relays the ground rules of this place and informs Bobby that he will allow him three questions.

Bobby’s first question is:

The rather mysterious and sinister answer to that question is –

He then goes on to inform Bobby that  –

Who the hell is the Administrator?

The rest of the group laugh when Bobby asks this very question.

Okay, so at this point my guess is Bobby has been transported somewhere – maybe it’s prison, or a mental health facility, at worst it might be some cult rehab. He’s obviously here to atone for his sins; he has a chance at graduating – to what and to where we have no inkling – he can’t leave, and he can only have visitors once in a blue moon.

And then Dwayne pipes up with this bombshell:

Bobby is adamant this will not happen to him. He’s nothing like these people, and his wife would never abandon him.

But will it?

Apparently everyone says this.

It’s at this point of utter despair when we think all is lost that we hear –

The sound of VEHICLES approaching from outside –

Oh Eureka! Maybe Bobby’s being saved from this nightmare after all.

They stand to their feet and surround Bobby…

The group quietly makes their way to the flimsy metal door. Sandy grabs Bobby’s hand, Dwayne grabs his other hand. They all share a glance…

All I will say at this junction is, fasten your seatbelts to see what’s coming around the next bend.

Writer L.P. Lapierre skillfully weaves a tale that wrings every emotion from the reader, charting a course that begins with drama, psychological horror, suspense and intrigue, culminating in a completely unexpected final scene that completely took me by surprise by pulling at the heartstrings and packing an emotional punch.

Dare I say, New Arrival is the perfect vehicle for debuting at film festivals, and would be just the ticket for a beginner filmmaker wanting to jump-start their career. Likewise it would be a worthy addition to any seasoned professional’s showreel.

Production Notes:

Most of the action takes place in one room.
One brief exterior location.
Character costumes – easy to find or DIY.
A small ensemble cast. Adult speaking parts, mostly minimal dialogue. Additional Actor/Extras.

Read the Script and talk about it on the Discussion Board

About the Writer: L.P. Lapierre 

I’m a Graphic Designer by day. I have worked in the art department on many productions ranging from feature film to tv. Though I love that side of filmmaking, it is the writing that has brought me endless amounts of joy since my teenage years.

Improving on the craft of screenwriting is my ultimate objective, having fun while doing it is a bonus. Seeing my work on a screen is a tall task, but one that would make all the effort worth it.

About the Reviewer:

L.Chambers has been writing all her life – especially in her head, and on scraps of paper. It’s only in the last few years she began to get serious about screen-writing. Prior to this she worked in the Features Department for ABC TV as a Program Assistant, and trained as a FAD. She currently works as a freelance web-content editor and lives with her husband (also a screenwriter) in Sydney, Australia.

*This is not in the public domain. You must reach out to the screenwriter for permission to film.