ICE (5-page short mystery screenplay) Written by PAUL KNAUER

Another entry from WEEK FOUR of Simply Scripts’ annual Writers Tournament. One of the top entries, which was assigned a genre and three criteria items under the theme, YOUR HERO IS THE VILLAIN, was Paul Knauer’s clever, who-dun-nit, crime-thriller, the aptly titled, ICE. Paul’s genre was MYSTERY and his three criteria items were; a HAND WARMER, a BAILIFF and a FACTORY. Big props to Paul, by the way – he’s been going beast mode during this tournament, also achieving a top voter’s score in Week Two with his script, LINES (which I also reviewed not too long ago).

Now, as I was reading through the first few pages, I was wondering to myself, “Why the hell is the title of this script called Ice?” I thought that maybe it was a play on words, like maybe somebody got “iced”, or killed. I mean, someone DID get killed in the story, but that’s not why is was given that title. When the mystery of this tale is solved later in the script, I understood – the title also just so happens to be a hint to the mystery presented to us. Which is pretty damn cool.

The story opens as hard-edged, tough-as-nails Detective Brown arrives at a crime scene, along with his assistant, Meg. Still stewing from the previous week’s trial when a man he put behind bars was found innocent and set free, Detective Brown isn’t in the best of moods.

The crime scene, at an abandoned warehouse/factor, is a grisly one – a man named Skip Turner was found brutally gunned down. The police at the scene seem to have ruled it a suicide, but Detective Brown, who recognizes the man, suspects foul play.

Luckily, the murder weapon was recovered at the scene – a gun with the serial number filed off. But Detective Brown is able to trace the gun back to a man named Bruce. It’s apparent that Detective Brown recognizes Bruce when he and Meg pay him a visit – he was the bailiff at Skip Turner’s trial last week.

Though Bruce reported the gun missing the week before, Detective Brown has a feeling about him – during the trial, there was a scuffle in court where Skip elbowed the bailiff in the face, leaving a nice shiner around his eye.

On his way out, Detective Brown grows even more suspicious of Bruce when he spots a few key items at the bailiff’s home – a needle and syringe sitting in a trash can and a couple of hand warmers peeking from beneath magazines on a side table. But HOW exactly are these key items in this case, you ask?

I won’t reveal TOO much here, as part of the fun is discovering how this crime was committed. But let’s just say that the syringe, needle and hand warmers cleverly come into play… along with an ice cube. I know you’re grinding your gears right now, trying to figure it out, but you’ll need to read for yourself to truly enjoy how this mystery unfolds.

After seeing KNIVES OUT recently and pretty much binge-watching every true crime show on every streaming service available over the past five months or so, I really, really needed something else to satisfy my appetite for a good crime-thriller/mystery. And especially after watching UNSOLVED MYSTERIES on Netflix, a show in which the mysteries remain, as the title indicates, unsolved, I needed something with a little resolve. Luckily, I stumbled upon ICE.

The script, obviously, was impressive on its own. But what really impressed me was that such an intricately and cleverly plotted script was written on such short notice, with assigned criteria items to include into the story – all while making those items (specifically the hand warmers) so vital to the story’s stunning reveal. Not only that, but it was all crammed into five pages of script without feeling forced or hurried, packing a punch that some half-hour and hour-long crime shows can’t match.

Incredibly clever, it would be a “crime” for this one not to be produced and seen on screen.

BUDGET: I’d say low to medium – there aren’t too many characters or locations, though the set designer would have to create the illusion of a court room (which could further be cheated with clever film making) and wardrobe would need to be involved for the cop uniforms. Either way, the script is worth whatever budget it will hopefully be given.

ABOUT THE WRITER: Paul is an optioned and produced screenwriter working out of the Kansas City area. His main focus is thrillers and slightly absurdist comedy with heart, most of them about life in the Midwest U.S. His first script, a sitcom pilot titled OH, BROTHER!, placed second in the 2012 Fresh Voices Screenplay Competition and was subsequently optioned. Paul’s diverse portfolio includes several feature thrillers, a couple of comedy features and multiple sitcom pilots, as well as dozens of shorts across genres. He believes that becoming a better writer requires the ability to push personal boundaries. Paul can be reached at: pkcardinal (a) gmail.

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About the Reviewer: Michael J. Kospiah is the award-winning screenwriter of critically acclaimed indie-thriller, The Suicide Theory (79% Rotten Tomatoes – available on Amazon Prime, Itunes, Google Play, etc) and 2020’s upcoming Aussie thriller, Rage. His horror feature, They Never Left is currently in development.