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1.

Terri
March 7th, 2012 at 4:02 pm

The problem here is that more thoughts should of gone into this script, short film. You got some vision on this topic but its not engaging. Sorry, too simple and not dark to those festivals standards. Just film it in black and whiite and put more camera angles, and dark lighting and give us a Night Shamalayan ending or an Twilight Zone feel.

This is sorry, no good.

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2.

Randy
March 9th, 2012 at 9:51 pm

Terri,

I agree… for the most part. While a more noir color/attitude toward the cinematography could have been employed to good use, I think that the editing left us without rhythm, purpose, or movement.

I was left wanting less. Sometimes the adage is true… less is more.

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3.

Andrew
March 20th, 2012 at 3:53 pm

I wanted to like this.

The pacing was too slow. It lacked build up and needed visual blocking help badly. Dolly shots or even slider shots greatly improve otherwise static scenes.

I would have been more inclined to see some excitement and watched him go to the station, see children play, pass by old people, birds ascending in slow-motion ect… He again contemplates life as the train whistle blows, then he jumps in front of of it to kill himself as bystanders scream and panic ensues, then as the excitement dies down everyone goes back to there buissness. We crain up and away from his body with the VO of the newsman. From a dramatic point of view, I think it would have been a much more interesting film to show the action rather than imply.

Nice effort though, good job getting out there and making it happen.

Andrew

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4.

aggy
March 24th, 2012 at 12:05 am

i think it could have been better if u work on your camera angles. it felt so disconnected and too far. i like the story just work on it some more. good luck.

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5.

Babz, Agent, Host of Babzbuzz
March 30th, 2012 at 11:38 am

Gets the GREAT TITLE award.

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6.

jaeskyler
June 14th, 2012 at 6:55 pm

This is a wonderful, and well structured film given the time period,the concept is great,the moments of twist is unpredictable,which makes it even better.I really like it.Props to the writer and the director,on job well done.

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7.

jaeskyler
June 14th, 2012 at 7:01 pm

Is a short film not a complete lengthy movie,is must leave audience thinking or laughing or even both.I was doing both.Especially when the character said that doesnt wanna miss his train`,also the letter he wrote to Edward,its just makes me think that someone can look happy and exciting and on the inside,they are so unhappy and frustrated.